ForumsArt, Music, and WritingSplendor in Memories

2 2798
Max000_Extreme
offline
Max000_Extreme
113 posts
780

The beauteous yesterday
is fading like a blushed twilight
Though nothing can bring back
The hours of sweet treasured past
I will grieve not
but rather find splendor
in its memories

  • 2 Replies
ellock
offline
ellock
388 posts
2,780

The poem is fine, I just feel like it could have more of an ending and more resolution to it. Plus there is no real drive in the poem that compels you to connect with the emotions or story of the poem. I have no problem with the poem and I think it is good, but that is my input. I don't really want to sound like a jerk through so please don't take this like I hate it and think you stink.

wolf1991
offline
wolf1991
3,462 posts
1,955

I can see you're new to the AMW forum. A word of advice from an old hand: don't make multiple threads for your poetry, just keep poetry and shorter works in one, all encompassing thread. Any long work is best to have a seperate thread.

Showing 1-2 of 2