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Rules of a Horror Movie

Posted Apr 14, '13 at 7:38pm

blk2860

blk2860

3,686 posts

Rule 12: Always carry a weapon from Clue.

Don't quite understand this one.

Rule 12: The crazy old man with the lazy eye is always right.

Since when? What movie?

Rule whatever: Do not rip off Zombieland.

This list is for if you're actually INSIDE a Horror movie. Like a character in one, not an actor.

Alright, here's the list:

Rules of a Horror Movie Alpha Version 0.2

Rule 1: Never split up. No exceptions.
Rule 2: Showering, is a HORRIBLE idea.
Rule 3: If you think you're safe, you probably aren't.
Rule 4: Don't be a hero.
  Rule 4-1: Be a Survivor.
  Rule 4-2: I think your life is more important then an awesome story for the front page.
Rule 5: Don't stay in secluded locations.
  Rule 5-1: Especially not camps, cabins, or lakes.
Rule 6: If your friend acts strange, don't take chances.
Rule 7: The police are generally useless.
  Rule 7-1: They'll show up just after the Protagonist has killed the Antagonist.
  Rule 7-2: Though the Antagonist isn't dead...
Rule 8: Never investigate Haunted houses or the like.
Rule 9: Don't go traveling when a mental patient escapes.
Rule 10: Do not, under any circumstances, accept odd gifts.
Rule 11: In this case, don't face your fears.
Rule 12: Be Alert. Never Sleep.

 

Posted Apr 14, '13 at 8:21pm

nichodemus

nichodemus

11,842 posts

Knight

Still, you die much quicker when you split up. Usually, when investigating what's going on, people try to split up, to cover more ground. The ghost isolates them and kills them off, one by one, and the others don't even know, so their guard isn't raised, and they're not on alert.

You can't do anything about the ghost most of the time. It's wherever it wants to be, at anytime.

The point is you're equally screwed against that type of a supernatural evil regardless of being in a group or alone. But if the enemy is physical and you've got a group, generally the risk is lower than being alone. Of course, there are some problems with a group. You'll get noticed easier. If there's something like a zombie outbreak and the group is large and poorly armed, it could spread quickly.

That I don't dispute. What issue I have is that the OP does not discern thoroughly the various horror sub genres, but instead lumps everything under a broad umbrella which makes the rules seem disorganized and over generalizing.

 

Posted Apr 15, '13 at 1:12am

LlordMaso

LlordMaso

40 posts

Maybe there should only be two rule...
Don't be afraid and stay alive :P

 

Posted Apr 15, '13 at 3:11am

Jacen96

Jacen96

2,147 posts

Rule 13: get Burt Gummer on your side.

Rule 14: look for a police telephone box

Rule 15: EXTERMINATE

Rule 16: Find a twinkie

~~~Darth Caedus

 

Posted Apr 15, '13 at 6:32pm

Somewhat49

Somewhat49

1,608 posts

You can't do anything about the ghost most of the time. It's wherever it wants to be, at anytime.

So basically your rules of how to survive a horror movie is:
1. You can't survive unless you do, you have no way to fight the possibility of you dying, it just happens or it doesn't.

I'd say as one rule, carry 3 flashlights, a handheld gaming system (for something to take your mind off of your horrible situation) and a lot of batteries.

 

Posted Apr 15, '13 at 10:02pm

pickpocket

pickpocket

3,322 posts

Rule whatever: Sex=death, but jerking off is acceptable.

 

Posted Apr 16, '13 at 11:09am

Jacen96

Jacen96

2,147 posts

Rule whatever: Sex=death, but jerking off is acceptable.

Yes it is, very deadly.

~~~Darth Caedus

 

Posted Apr 16, '13 at 11:46am

nichodemus

nichodemus

11,842 posts

Knight

1. You can't survive unless you do, you have no way to fight the possibility of you dying, it just happens or it doesn't.

That would be it for a ghost movie, yes.

 

Posted May 8, '13 at 10:09pm

Kreitmaker

Kreitmaker

259 posts

Here's another rule:

Use practical effects, not CGI, if you want a believable horror movie.

 
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