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Parental Controlls: Are they nessecary?

Posted Aug 2, '13 at 9:24pm

blk2860

blk2860

4,405 posts

No, I never had them, and I grew up fine.

-Spirit

 

Posted Aug 4, '13 at 7:45am

MacII

MacII

1,369 posts

My thought would be that people will and should pretty much do as they see fit.

 

Posted Aug 4, '13 at 8:25am

MacII

MacII

1,369 posts

ps OK so my answer while sincere and truly the gist of anything I'd have to say on it I realize may come across as somewhat flippant.

Are you a kid yourself asking?

I don't know, first of all I reckon where I live (the Netherlands -- you know, that Sodom & Gomorrah of all things vile and evil ;) ) may be a lot more liberal regarding some things than may some other places be. (Then indeed, rest assured things aren't as clear-cut over here, either, and may vary widely locally and individually!)

Then I don't have kids myself, a conscious decision I may add, but it doesn't stop me from wondering how I would go about these things. Let's say sexuality assuming that's one thing we're talking about I have no objections to whatsoever on any puritanical grounds, however one thing that caused me great struggle as a child was this near-universal and absolute pressure to conform to all kinds of gender stereotypes, the subtle and the not-so subtle; what being a man or a woman (a boy or a girl) and your sexual orientation and its expression and yada yada and all of it should really be all about.

I hated it, and should like to think I managed to pretty much liberate myself from all that nonsensical jazz, but not without (quite some) struggle, indeed (of the mind, as well as practical, and down to physical threats and confrontations, and ostracism and what have you). Perhaps a necessary part of growing to maturity, let's leave that question aside for the moment.

But so if I thought mainstream society as well as "youth" culture and all that was pretty pressing in my time, I can only imagine what it would be like for kids growing up now, and there to my mind seemingly being a lot less alternative choices, to boot. I think this pressure to conform seems to currently be only greater, and if you step out of line, you truly will be stepping out of line.

I mean what with music channels and stuff being only fuller with that much harsher and cruder stereotypes, there now being kiddie bands aimed at toddlers (!), and all that stuff. (Then indeed, over here at least there regularly being amazingly adult-themed TV on at what I would consider children's hours i.e. the early evening, not to mention again what the general advertising industry throws at you.)

Now would I, however, seek to keep them from being confronted with or exposed to it? Hard to say, maybe to a degree, and I would wish for them to just have better stuff on their minds at a certain age, not all this commercial and stereotyped garbage; but I think mostly I'd rather not, and instead discuss the accompanying and underlying issues together, in the hope of offering them a context to it all, and for them to learn to make up a mind of their own.

Easier said than done, no doubt (hey, I said I don't have any for a reason ;) ), and surely I'd be seeking to keep it playful while I were at it; discussing a thing to death with children when they don't have the mind for it surely can be another disastrous approach.

Well, hope this may be something of an answer :)

Bottom line then, I think my watching porn at age 13 or so caused me a lot less harm than being faced with this full-on non-stop stereotyping all day long, at school, at home, on the streets, on TV or the radio, at the cinema, indeed in pretty much all of your culture.

But so as a parent, might I use some such control? I don't know, I'd probably try to minimize it, but I can well see myself using them to some degree. For the kids' part, I'd advise to focus less on the boobs and butts you don't get to see, but more on so what do I really make of these gender roles thrown at me. How do you really feel about that? Do or will they make you happy? Are there alternatives to it?

 

Posted Aug 8, '13 at 9:00pm

xXxDAPRO89xXx

xXxDAPRO89xXx

4,393 posts

I've lived a normal life without controls. I personally don't like them and think of them as a limit to your life. (which they pretty much are)

 

Posted Aug 9, '13 at 1:23am

MysterDuck

MysterDuck

104 posts

If you're good with your kids and if you believe them, then no. If they're sneaky,
and something, I would say maybe. I never had parental control, my parents believe me and I never hide or lie to them

 

Posted Aug 9, '13 at 2:52pm

thebluerabbit

thebluerabbit

2,917 posts

yes, definitely. to those who say they didnt have parental control... what kind of games existed when you were a child? im 20 and the coolest games around that even grown ups would play were the lion king, mario, sonic, and even pacman. maybe some years ago id say theres no need to it but today its a whole different thing.

well first of all id be pretty disapointed if a child knew he shouldnt play something and he does. even more disapointed if a parent didnt even pay attention to what the kid is buying... we wouldnt need that if parents were responsible enough. but... games are so much easier to get today that there really SHOULD be parental control.

when i was a kid the worst things in video games were plenty of blood, bad graphical zombie explosions etc. today things are much more graphical, horror games are way better and they add sexual themes, bad language and whatnot to many games. i personally wouldnt want a 5 year old to play a 18+ horror game with inner organs flying and rape scenes (and personally, if that existed in video games when i was a child then im greatful i didnt play any of those stuff)

 

Posted Aug 9, '13 at 4:43pm

Ishtaron

Ishtaron

83 posts

I find them to be a nuisance but I'm neither a parent nor a child.  Parents should have a way to control what their children are watching or playing and parental controls provide an easy way to do that.  They're also an effective way of shutting down the people that want to ban M/R rated content for everyone.

The Lion King was an awesome game thebluerabbit but it was far from the most mature game out there.  There have been extremely inappropriate games pretty much since video games were first invented.  Custer's Last Stand is infamous for it's horribly adult content and was released in 1982 on the Atari 2600.

 

Posted Aug 9, '13 at 10:59pm

EmperorPalpatine

EmperorPalpatine

5,011 posts

Parents should have a way to control what their children are watching or playing and parental controls provide an easy way to do that.

But it's like saying "Don't jump in the puddles" and roping off a single puddle. It only blocks what the parents have direct control over. Sure, it's temporary comfort for the parents, but most kids will find access elsewhere as soon as they can. Or they overload when they're older. I recently saw a 20/20 episode where many teens in a strict LDS community sneak out and get wasted because they don't know their limit. Total restriction isn't the answer. Education is.

bad language

I learned all the words (well, the main ones) from kids at school by 3rd grade. Blocking games and shows won't help that. Teaching self-control so they don't repeat it does.

i personally wouldnt want a 5 year old to play a 18+ horror game with inner organs flying and rape scenes (and personally, if that existed in video games when i was a child then im greatful i didnt play any of those stuff)

Pretty sure inner organs flew in Mortal Kombat. Good times, good times.

Custer's Last Stand is infamous for it's horribly adult content and was released in 1982 on the Atari 2600.

Wasn't it Custer's Revenge?

 

Posted Aug 9, '13 at 11:35pm

Salvidian

Salvidian

3,950 posts

Allowing your children to watch and play whatever they want leads to desensitization. A little bit of desensitization helps reduce culture shock when they get older, but too much is bad. That's where you get kids who don't have reaction to bad things anymore.

 

Posted Aug 10, '13 at 6:49am

Akatia

Akatia

1 post

As a kid, my computer didn't have any Parental Controls. My father helped me a lot and I was smart enough not to go on virus sites and stuff.

 
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