Forums → The Tavern → In the Service of our Dark Lord and Savior, Cthulhu
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100 million years ago, the Great Cthulhu entered into his period of hibernation, awaiting the time from whence forth he would emerge to bring to the Earth much evil and destruction. So it has been written by the Prophet Lovecraft.
So too, has it been written, that the Dread Cthulhu would spring forth from his slumbers and quench his thirst and hungr upon the blood and flesh of those dwelling in this realm. Such a fate is unavoidable, for unlike Hastur the Unspeakable we are ordained to dwell among the surface in the dust. So it has been written by the Prophet Lovecraft.
It is then my duty to you, my fellow citizens, to warn you that such a time is near. Cthulhu is soon to emerge, and upon those who have faithfully awaited his coming he will visit immediate and relatively painless deaths. However, those who doubted his existence and sid not prepare will be violently and completely destroyed in what is sure to be a long and agonizing affair.
The final awakening of our Dark Lord and Master is soon upon us, and the time is quickly running out where you might make yourself a useful servant of His most Sinister and Malicious Master. Please post to signify your own enlightenment, that you might serve as a living testament to the unfaithful.
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn.
- 39 Replies
Cthuhlu will rise again and destroy everything upon the Earth. He is not the center of worship of mankind for nothing. He is the greatest of evils, the most terrible of travesties, the most malevolent of gods. To even consider such a question is an acceptance of the impossible.
I accept impossibilities all the time because it's the only way to stay sane.
"Khlûl'hloo" or "Kathooloo"
Look, Cthulhu. I don't have a problem with you taking over the world, but can you at least change your name to something easier to say? Thanks.
Your soon to be dead loyal subject, Xeano321.
Be gone, blasphemer! The Dread Cthuhlu has power overall who dwell on this surface! You have ears, but you do not listen! You have eyes, but you do not see! You deny his most Terribleness with your mouth, while your heart screams forth its praise born of innate fear! You have the gall to use the Prophet Lovecraft in your ramblings, but will not pay His most Malevolent service? May you be consumed ten thousand times over! Be gone! Be gone!
You Heathen! What do I care about this surface? My ears listen to the mad words of Nyarlathotep. My eyes gaze across the universe and beyond. Soon the Fungi will take my brain away to see things you can't begin to understand. Praised be the Necronomicon which has opened my very eyes! Praised be the Dreamer Lovecraft who has so much more to offer than that primitive worship you perpetuate, adoring but a lesser deity in the Pantheon. I will be gone, do not worry. Gone to see other universes, gone to see Darkness and Chaos and consume my mind in insanity!
Cthuhlu will rise again and destroy everything upon the Earth. He is not the center of worship of mankind for nothing. He is the greatest of evils, the most terrible of travesties, the most malevolent of gods. To even consider such a question is an acceptance of the impossible.
Ok, I have another question, why doesn't Cthulhu relax? Like maybe do some Marijuana or something? I'm not telling him how to live, I'm just saying he should use his options to be happy. =p
Look, Cthulhu. I don't have a problem with you taking over the world, but can you at least change your name to something easier to say? Thanks.
Not to mention, there is no nickname for someone like Cthulhu. I am named after a so called "creature of myth" and I have a nickname, Mino. What do you call Cthulhu? Cth? Hulhu? Cthu? Nope, none of them are as catchy.
Not to mention, there is no nickname for someone like Cthulhu. I am named after a so called "creature of myth" and I have a nickname, Mino. What do you call Cthulhu? Cth? Hulhu? Cthu? Nope, none of them are as catchy.
how about lu? or tooloo?
I'm not telling him how to live, I'm just saying he should use his options to be happy. =p
Burning ant hills makes certain humans happy. Cthulhus wrath, I think, is quite comparable to this situation, except that the 'ant hill' he'll be burning is Earth. Oh, and there's also that revenge part...
Not to mention, there is no nickname for someone like Cthulhu.
You know, I think a being like Cthulhu is sort of too nightmarish to really have a nickname. After all, a nickname is sign of familiarity; there's no familiarity with Cthulhu, only terror and alienation.
And it's disrespectful towards all future victims.
or tooloo?
How is that shorter?
Ok, I have another question, why doesn't Cthulhu relax? Like maybe do some Marijuana or something? I'm not telling him how to live, I'm just saying he should use his options to be happy. =p
He is dreaming. Soon he will awaken.
One does not tell Cthuhlu how to live. It is by the grace of Cthuhlu that we continue living, until the day he awakens.
Not to mention, there is no nickname for someone like Cthulhu. I am named after a so called "creature of myth" and I have a nickname, Mino. What do you call Cthulhu? Cth? Hulhu? Cthu? Nope, none of them are as catchy.
To quote the Prophet Lovecraft:
"And yea, he shall be called Master, Dark Savior, He Who Lies Dreaming, The Dreaded One, and The Great Consumer. But by all will he be known as The Cthuhlu, even upon the moment of their consumption."
You know, I think a being like Cthulhu is sort of too nightmarish to really have a nickname. After all, a nickname is sign of familiarity; there's no familiarity with Cthulhu, only terror and alienation.
And it's disrespectful towards all future victims.
Even as your mouth denies him, so does your heart adore him.
Ill try to scream out in the ocean his name and say "lz be awaken Cthulhu our almighty dark lord"
How do I study the language of Cthulhu and everything do I need a book of magic of Cthulhu, ANYTHING, I'm ready to worship the almighty dark lord
How do you even pronounce that?
The human tongue is not able to properly speak the language of the Old Ones. However, Kuh-too-loo is a common pronunciation of He Who Lies Dreaming.
I'a! I'a! Cthulhu fthagn!
Cthulhu fthagn!
I win again!
On that same note, does anyone ever wonder if they're too... monodimensional?
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