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Join me tomorrow as we test the manliness of Manly.

ok i am exited to hear you're next therie if i spelled anything wrong please forgive me by the way i will try to contribute something going to sleep now

Ever heard of this theory?
It's a good one from Calclus 1


\\int_{\\phi(a)}^{\\phi(b)} f(x)\\,dx = \\int_a^b f(\\phi(t))\\phi'(t)\\, dt.

Ahhh! SORRY! that link is screwed up.
Alright, here's a better one.

Here's the Stokes Theorem.
It's pretty easy once you get to understand the basic relations and functions.

I believe this.
With my soul.

When a albino kitten born in alleyway is named 'Diabolic' by a human opens its eyes for the first time, the polar ice caps will melt.

You're lucky I'm not a Mod yet

I'm not a Mod yet

yet

You could have just given us the link to the website instead of posting all of that.

ok so i could have done that or i could do this again

Every Pixar movie is connected. I explain how, and possibly why.

Several months ago, I watched a fun-filled video on Cracked.com that introduced the idea (at least to me) that all of the Pixar movies actually exist within the same universe. Since then, Iâve obsessed over this concept, working to complete what I call âThe Pixar Theory,â a working narrative that ties all of the Pixar movies into one cohesive timeline with a main theme.

This theory covers every Pixar production since Toy Story. That includes:

A Bugâs Life
Toy Story 2
Monsters Inc.
Finding Nemo
The Incredibles
Cars
Ratatouille
Wall-E
Up
Toy Story 3
Cars 2
Brave
Monsters University
The point of this theory is to have fun and exercise your imagination while simultaneously finding interesting connections between these fantastic movies. If you hate fun and/or imagination, you probably wonât like this theory.

[SIDE NOTE: All text in blue indicates updated edits since the original version]

Brave is the first and last movie in the timeline. Obviously, this movie about a Scottish kingdom during the Dark Ages is the earliest time period covered by the Pixar films, but itâs also the only Pixar movie that actually explains why animals in the Pixar universe behave like humans sometimes.

In Brave, Merida discovers that there is âmagicâ that can solve her problems but inadvertently turns her mother into a bear. We find out that this magic comes from an odd witch seemingly connected to the mysterious will-of-the-wisps. Not only do we see animals behaving like humans, but we also see brooms (inanimate objects) behaving like people in the witchâs shop.

We also learn that this witch inexplicably disappears every time she passes through doors, leading us to believe that she may not even exist. Donât get ahead of me, but weâll come back to Brave. Letâs just say, for now, the witch is someone we know from a different movie in the timeline.

[Some of you pointed out that the animals in Brave gradually regress back into an animal state, disproving the idea that this is the source of animals acting like humans. My rebuttal is simple. They regress because the magic wears off. Over time, their evolving intelligence grows naturally.]

Centuries later, the animals from Brave that have been experimented on by the witch have interbred, creating a large-scale population of animals slowly gaining personification and intelligence on their own.

There are two progressions: the progression of the animals and the progression of artificial intelligence. The events of the following movies set up a power struggle between humans, animals, and machines.

The stage for all-out war in regards to animals is set by Ratatouille, Finding Nemo, and Up, in that order. Notice I left out A Bugâs Life, but Iâll explain why later.

In Ratatouille, we see animals experimenting with their growing personification in small, controlled experiments.

Remy wants to cook, something only humans explicitly do. He crafts a relationship with a small group of humans and finds success. Meanwhile, the villain of Ratatouille, Chef Skinner, disappears. What happened to him? What did he do with his newfound knowledge that animals were capable of transcending their instincts and performing duties better than humans?

Itâs possible that Charles Muntz, the antagonist of Up, learned of this startling rumor, giving him the idea to begin inventing devices that would harness the thoughts of animals, namely his dogs, through translator collars. Those collars indicated to Muntz that animals are smarter and more like humans than we think. He needed this technology to find the exotic bird heâs obsessed over, and he even comments on how many dogs heâs lost since he arrived in South America.

But then Dug and the rest of his experiments are set free after Muntzâs demise, and we donât know the full implications of that, but what we do know is that animosity between the animals and humans is growing steadily. Now that humans have discovered the potential of animals, they are beginning to cross the line. To develop this new technology, the humans begin an industrial revolution hinted at in Up.

[Some have pointed out that Muntz was working in South America before the events of Ratatouille. This is true, but it is not explicitly stated how and when he developed the collars. Also, we know Ratatouille takes place before Up for several reasons. In Toy Story 3, a postcard on Andy's wall has Carl and Ellie's name and address on it (including their last names to confirm). This confirms that in 2010, the time of Toy Story 3, Ellie is still alive or hasn't been dead long. This supports the idea that Up takes place years later.]

In the beginning of Up, Carl is forced to give up his house to a corporation because they are expanding the city. Think on that. What corporation is guilty for polluting the earth and wiping out life in the distant future because of technology overreach?

Buy-n-Large (BNL), a corporation that runs just about everything by the time we get to Wall-E. In theâHistory of BNLâ commercial from the movie, weâre told that BNL has even taken over the world governments. Did you catch that this one corporation achieved global dominance?Interestingly, this is the same organization alluded to in Toy Story 3:

In Finding Nemo, we have an entire population of sea creatures uniting to save a fish that was captured by humans. BNL shows up again in this universe via another news article that talks about a beautiful underwater world.

Lines are being crossed. Humans are beginning to antagonize the increasingly networked and intelligent animals.

Think about Dory from Finding Nemo for a second. She stands apart from most of the other fish. Why? She isnât as intelligent. Her short-term memory loss is likely a result of her not being as advanced as the other sea creatures, which is a reasonable explanation for how rapidly these creatures are evolving.

Itâs likely that the sequel to Finding Nemo, which is about Dory, will touch on this and further explain why. We may also get some more evidence pointing to animosity between humans and animals.

[Some great users have pointed out that Dory is actually more intelligent and shows signs of growth due to her ability to read and communicate with whales. This would actually show signs of how the animals are beginning to change in intelligence gradually.]

And that is the furthest movie in the âanimalâ side of things. When it comes to A.I., we start with The Incredibles. Who is the main villain of this movie? You probably thought of Buddy, a.ka. Syndrome, who basically commits genocide on super-powered humans.

Or does he? Buddy didnât have any powers. He used technology to enact revenge on Mr. Incredible for not taking him seriously. Seems a little odd that the man went so far as to commit genocide.

[A lot of people have been arguing about where The Incredibles actually takes place because we see technology from modern times and the 1980s even though everything has a 1960s vibe. This is cleared by Brad Bird, the director, who says the movie takes place in an alternate 1960s, which means the movie opens in the 1950s.]

And how does he kill all of the supers? He creates the omnidroid, an A.I. âkillbotâ that learns the moves of every super-human and adapts. When Mr. Incredible is first told about this machine, Mirage mentions that it is an advanced artificial intelligence that has gone rogue.

Mr. Incredible points out that it got smart enough to wonder why it had to take orders. The omnidroid eventually turns on Syndrome, and starts attacking humans in the city. Why would an A.I. want to just attack randomly? Do machines have an inherent hatred of humans?

The movie even shows clips of the superheroes with capes being done in by inanimate objects, such as plane turbinesâ¦accidentally.

But why would machines want to get rid of humans in the first place? We know that animals donât like humans because they are polluting the Earth and experimenting on them, but why would the machines have an issue?

Enter Toy Story. Here we see humans using and discarding âobjectsâ that are clearly sentient. Yes, the toys love it Uncle Tom style, but over the course of the Toy Story sequels, we see toys becoming fed up. But wait, toys and inanimate objects arenât necessarily machines, so how do they have some kind of intelligence?

Syndrome points to the answer. He tells Mr. Incredible that his lasers are powered by Zero Point Energy. This is the electromagnetic energy that exists in a vacuum. Itâs the unseen energy we find in wavelengths and a reasonable explanation for how toys and objects in the Pixar world draw power.

By the events of the Toy Story movies, we are in the 90s until 2010. Itâs been 40-50 years or so since the events of The Incredibles, giving A.I. plenty of time to develop BNL.

Meanwhile, Pixar is hinting at dissatisfaction among pockets of toy civilizations. The toys rise up against Sid in the first movie. Jesse resents her owner, Emily, for abandoning her. Lotso Hugginâ Bear straight up hates humans by the third movie.

Toys are obviously not satisfied with the status quo, providing a reason for why machines and objects alike are ready to take over.

So, by the 2000s, the super-humans all but gone, and mankind is vulnerable. Animals, who want to rise up Planet of the Apes style, have the ability to take over, but we donât see this happen.

Also, A.I. never takes over humans by force. Why do you think that is? Itâs reasonable to assume that machines did take over, just not as we expected. The machines used BNL, a faceless corporation (which are basically faceless in nature) to dominate the world, starting in the 1960s after the Omnidroid fails to defeat the Incredibles.

In each of the Toy Story movies, itâs made painfully clear that sentient objects rely on humans for everything. For fulfillment and even energy. Itâs hinted at that the Toys lose all life when put away in âstorageâ unless they are in a museum that will get them seen by humans.

So machines decide to control humans by using a corporation that suits their every need, leading to an industrial revolution that eventually leads toâ&brvbarollution. When the animals rise up against the humans to stop them from polluting the earth, who will save them? The machines.

We know that the machines will win the war, too, because after this war, there are almost no animals left on Earth. Whoâs left?

Because the machines tip everything out of balance, Earth becomes an unfit planet for humans and animals, so the remaining humans are put on Axiom (or Noahâs Ark if you want to carry on the Biblical theme where Wall-E is basically Robot Jesus and his love interest is aptly named Eve) as a last-ditch effort to save the human race.

On Axiom, the humans have no purpose aside from having their needs met by the machines. The machines have made humans dependent on them for everything because that is how they were treated as âtoys.â Itâs all they know.

Meanwhile on Earth, machines are left behind to populate the world and run things, explaining human landmarks and traditions still being prominent in Cars. There are no animals or humans in this version of Earth because theyâre all gone, but we do know that the planet still has many human influences left.

[Some have noted that the world of Cars can't be after humans left because there's no pollution shown in the movies. If you look carefully at Wall-E, however, the world is never shown during this time, so we don't really know how badly the Earth was polluted. It's possible that the machines sent humans away to curb overpopulation and fix the environment without them, but the world was drained of resources as a result of machines populating the Earth. That would explain why the machines abandoned Earth entirely, leaving only Wall-E behind.]

In Cars 2, the cars go to Europe and Japan, making it plain that this is all taking place on Earth as we know it. So what happened to the cars? Weâve learned by now that humans are the source of energy for the machines. Thatâs why they never got rid of them.

In Wall-E, they point out that BNL intended to bring the humans back once the planet was clean again, but they failed. The machines on Earth eventually died out, though we donât know how.

What we do know is that there is an energy crisis in Cars 2, with oil being the only way society trudges on despite its dangers. We even learn that the Allinol corporation was using âgreen energyâ as a catalyst for a fuel war in order to turn cars away from alternative energy sources. That âcleanâ fuel could have been used to wipe out many of the cars, very quickly.

[Someone pointed out that "all in all" means the same thing as "by and large" making the connection between Cars and Wall-E even more substantial.]

Which brings us back to Wall-E. Have you ever wondered why Wall-E was the only machine left? We know that the movie begins 800 years after humans have left Earth on Axiom, governed by the AutoPilot (another A.I. reference).

Could it be that Wall-Eâs fascination with human culture and friendship with a ****roach is what allowed him to keep finding fulfillment and the ability to maintain his personality? Thatâs why he was special and liberated the humans.

He remembered the times when humans and machines lived in peace, away from all of the pollution caused by both sides.

After Wall-E liberates the humans and they rebuild society back on Earth, what happens then? During the end credits of Wall-E, we see the shoe that contains the last of plant life. It grows into a mighty tree. A tree that strikingly resembles the central tree in A Bugâs Life.

Thatâs right. The reason no humans show up in A Bugâs Life is because there arenât a lot left. We know because of the ****roach that some of the insects survived, meaning they would have rebounded a bit faster, though the movie had to be far enough in the timeline for birds to have returned as well, though theyâre noticeably less intelligent than the bugs.

[I'll admit, the trees looking similar isn't enough to support the idea that A Bug's Life takes place after Wall-E, but there's definitely more reasons for why it's likely. Also, I'll bring the tree up again later because it appears in Up as well.]

Thereâs something strikingly different about A Bugâs Life when compared to other Pixar portrayals of animals, which leads me to believe it takes place in the future. Unlike Ratatouille, Up, and Finding Nemo, the bugs have many human activities similar to what the rats in Ratatouille were merely experimenting with.

The bugs have cities, bars, advertisements, their own machines, know what a bloody mary is and even have a traveling circus. This all assumes that the movie is in a different time period.

The other factor that sets A Bugâs Life apart from other Pixar movies is the fact that it is the only one, besides Cars and Cars 2, that doesnât revolve (or even include) humans.

[Okay there is a a lot of contention over the idea that A Bug's Life takes place post-apocalypse, but hear me out. The reason I am so inclined to push the idea is because of how different the bug world is from the "animal" movies. No other Pixar movie has animals wearing clothing, wild inventions, animals creating machines, or so much human influence like bars and cities. In Finding Nemo, the most human thing we see is a school, and even that is pretty stripped down. But in A Bug's Life, we have a world where humans are barely even implied. At one point, one of the ants tells Flik not to leave the island because there are "snakes, birds, and bigger bugs out there." He doesn't even bring up humans. Yes, there are some humans, like the kid who allegedly picked the wings off of the homeless bug, but that still fits in a post Wall-E world. Also, the bugs have to be irradiated for them to live such long lifespans. The average lifespan of an ant is just 3 months, but these ants all survive an entire summer and allude to being around for quite some time by saying things like "this happens every year." One of the ants even says he "feels 90 again." That works if you accept that the ants are sturdier due to evolution and mutated genes.]

Thereâs another Pixar movie that was supposed to be released in 2012, but was cancelled and replaced with Brave. This movie was called Newt and I believe it might have fit in this part of the timeline post-Wall-E. The movieâs supposed plot: âWhat happens when the last remaining male and female blue-footed newts on the planet are forced together by science to save the species, and they canât stand each other?â (Read here for more)

A movie about an endangered species rebuilding itself could lend itself nicely to this theory, but since the movie was never released, Iâm just speculating.

So what happens next? Humanity, machines, and animals grow in harmony to the point where a new super species is born. Monsters. The monsters civilization is actually Earth in the incredibly distant future.

[Someone wisely pointed out that in Monsters University, the college is said to be founded in 1313. If we're really in the future, then that means the monsters could have reset society and begun using their own calendar. That could mean Monsters Inc. takes place up to 1400 (or more) years after A Bug's Life.]

Where did they come from? Itâs possible that the monsters are simply the personified animals mutated after the diseased earth was irradiated for 800 years.

[Not during Wall-E. I would guess that it took hundreds of years after Wall-E for the animals to become monsters]

Whatever the reason, these monsters seem to all look like horribly mutated animals, only larger and civilized. They have cities and even colleges, as we see in Monsters University.

[An issue some have found is that this doesn't properly explain what happened to humans. I haven't settled on a theory I really like yet, but I'm leaning towards the idea that monsters and machines eventually forgot that they need humans and got rid of them again, not realizing their mistake until all humans died out. Another explanation is that humans just couldn't survive on Earth anymore.]

In Monsters Inc., they have an energy crisis because they are in a future earth without humans. Humans are the source of energy, but thanks to the machines, again, the Monsters find a way to use doors to travel to the human world. Only, itâs not different dimensions.

The monsters are going back in time. Theyâre harvesting energy to keep from becoming extinct by going back to when humans were most prominent. The peak of civilization, if you will. Though a lot of time has passed, animosity towards humans never really went away for animals/monsters.

Monsters must have relied on anti-human instincts to believe that just touching a human would corrupt their world like it did in the past. So they scare humans to gather their energy until they realize that laughter (green energy) is more efficient because it is positive in nature.

[An alternative explanation that fits even better that some of you brought up: The machines and monsters created the time travel doors but realized that messing with time could erase their existence and change history. So, they falsely trained monsters to believe that humans are toxic and from another dimension, making it suicide for a monster to interact too much with their world. Another issue is how the monsters seem to worry about kids "being less scared these days." It's likely that going in the past takes a lot of energy, so the monsters can only go back as far as the practice still returns a profit in energy. To them, they're just moving through the same dimension of time, but the monsters at the top know that eventually, they'll run out. This is why Waternose is so bent on capturing children and enslaving them.]

We even see a connection between A Bugâs Life and Monsters Inc. via the trailer we see in both movies. As you can see, the trailer looks exactly the same, except the one in A Bugâs Life is noticeably older and more decrepit, while the one in Monsters Inc. (where Randall is sent via a door) has humans and looks newer.

Look at the picture above. On the left is the trailer from A Bugâs Life and the one on the right is from Monsters Inc. The one on the left looks older and more rundown. Even the vegetation is noticeably dryer and thereâs less of it. The trailer on the right has humans and the frame even includes tall grass and a tree hanging overhead.

[Some have argued that the trailer in A Bug's Life should be nothing but dust. I disagree based on how barely intact other buildings were in Wall-E. They also bring up the bug zapper that is powered by electricity. The zapper could easily be solar powered, just like Wall-E. The bugs probably used it as a light source to signal other bugs to "Bug City." Also, the trailer in A Bug's Life never shows lights in the trailer like it does for Monsters Inc.]

That said, Monsters Inc. is so far the most futuristic Pixar movie. By the end, humans, animals, and machines have finally found a way to understand each other and live harmoniously.

And then thereâs Boo. What do you think happened to her? She saw everything take place in future earth where âkittyâ was able to talk. She became obsessed with finding out what happened to her friend Sully and why animals in her time werenât quite as smart as the ones sheâd seen in the future.

She remembers that âdoorsâ are the key to how she found Sully in the first place and becomesâ¦

A WITCH. Yes, Boo is the witch from Brave. She figures out how to travel in time to find Sully, and goes back to what she believes is the source: The will-of-the-wisps.

They are what started everything, and as a witch, she cultivates this magic in an attempt to find Sully by creating doors going backwards and forwards in time.

[Just to clarify: The theory is that Boo discovered a way to use doors to travel through time on her own, possibly by developing magic on her own. She probably went back in time to the Dark Ages to get more magic from the will-o-wisps.]

How do we know? In Brave, you can briefly see a drawing in the workshop. Itâs Sully.

We even see the Pizza Planet truck carved as a wooden toy in her shop, which makes no sense unless sheâs seen one beforeâ¦(and Iâm sure she has since that truck is in almost every Pixar movie). If you look closely, you can see the carved truck below.

You remember Merida opening doors and the witch constantly disappearing? Itâs because those doors are made the same way from Monsters Inc. They transport across time and that is why Merida couldnât find the witch later in the movie.

[A lot of people have brought up how easter eggs are scattered throughout all the Pixar movies. I barely scratch the surface, but a great theory offered by some that I support is that these easter eggs are planted by Boo either intentionally or accidentally as she travels through time to find Sully. Some support for that is the fact that every easter egg in Brave lies in her workshop.]

But wait. How did Boo travel in time in the first place, and why is she obsessed with wood? Boo must have discovered that wood has been the source of energy all along, not just humans. The machines and monsters in Monsters Inc. use doors because theyâre made of wood and found a way to use that energy to travel in time.

[Many have pointed out how the door that banishes monsters is metal. That's probably because wood is used to harness this magic, and using a metal door would stop a banished monster from going back through it.]

Obsessed with finding Sully, Boo travelled across the Pixar universe using doors.

[It's even possible that the wood from the tree in A Bug's Life is the source of Flik's ingenuity, due to his fascination and respect for seeds growing into trees. The tree also bears a resemblance to the one in Up that Carl and Ellie frequented, which could be the source of Carl's wild creativity in using balloons to transport his house. This also explains why Flik and Heimlich from A Bug's Life show up in Toy Story 2, which would be centuries before their time. Boo was trying to go to the future and could have fallen short by landing in the post-Wall-E time. She would need wood to keep time traveling, but there's not much around yet, so she stumbles upon the tree in A Bug's Life. She could have accidentally brought back a few bugs with her when traveling backwards in time.]

So Boo went back to the Dark Ages, probably because she could use plenty of wood there for her experiments or to study the will-o-wisps. We know that her first encounter with Morâdu ended with her turning him into a monstrous bear, but he regresses.

She probably wanted to turn him into a bear because Sully resembles a bear, and she is still trying to figure out where Sully comes from.

Does Boo ever find Sully? I like to think so. He surely reunited with her at least once as a child at the end of Monsters Inc., but eventually, he had to stop visiting.

But her love for Sully is, after all, the crux of the entire Pixar universe. The love of different people of different ages and even different species finding ways to live on Earth without destroying it because of a lust for energy.

And that is the Pixar Theory. More will be added to it, undoubtedly, when Pixarâs next movie The Good Dinosaur comes out in 2014.

[The Good Dinosaur is supposed to be about an alternate universe where dinosaurs never went extinct because a meteor never wiped them out. They have humans as pets in this alternate reality. My theory is that this "alternate universe" explains why so many things in Pixar's universe are different from ours. It's because evolution was never interrupted by a world-wide catastrophe. Humans evolved into supers and animals gained sentience faster, accelerating the apocalypse for resources that could do the same to our timeline. Oh, and Dinoco from Toy Story and Cars is a loose, but fun connection to speculate on.]

Until then, if you have anything to contribute or correct, donât hesitate to bring it to my attention. Thanks for reading, and for a visual of the timeline with dates, click here.

Also, if youâre wondering whether or not Planes fits into this theory, read my full take on that subject here.

Like what you read? Connect with me further via twitter@JonNegroni. Iâll follow back if you seem like a real person. You can also subscribe to this blog by clicking the âfollowâ button in the top-left corner.

Donât forget to check out New Professional News, a list of headlines essential for any new professional, updated daily at 8am.

All images courtesy of Disney/Pixar

by the way have you read all of the first one?

How Manly is Manly?

I'm sure all of you know by now that @Imthemostmanliestman is indeed very manly. But I'm sure most of you have been wondering, how manly is manly? Well I will explain that to you now. If I could do this in the form of a song I would, but I'd rather your ears stay attached.

So I've recently asked Manly a random series of manly questions for him to answer, which were: What is your favorite food? What is your height? Do you wear cool shades? Do you know how to build a nuclear reactor? Do you know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Do you have 11 toes? Why does my ear sound like a crushed can? Are you aware of the Gantic appocalypse? And finally... What atom were you born on?

Now lets start with, What is your favorite food. Let me tell you which food groups contain manliness, meat, grain, and fats. Everything else is woman's territory. Now his answer was Chinese, which fortunately contains lots of meat. So it seems his favorite food is manly after all. Lets continue shall we?

I asked him his height. Now let me remind you, the taller the person, the more manly they are. 6 feet is manly, even if you are just a millimeter shorter you are not manly. What is manly's height you ask? 5'9 unfortunately. So Seems manly's height is not manly after all.

So I asked manly if he has cool shades. This doesn't actually have to do with manliness but I'd thought you'd all like to know he wears transition lenses. Ok lets move on before this gets akward.

I asked him if he knew how to build a nuclear reactor, he replied with "What do you think?" So I imagined that he threatened me with a weapon of some sort, so that is indeed very manly.

So it appears that Manly does know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop. He however didn't tell me, which is cowardly and unmanly. So he's a failure at that.

The next 2 questions actually had nothing to do with manliness either. Was just asking him because he's a secret doctor.

Now it is unfortunate to say that Manly is Gantic's co-conspirator. So after this we're going to beat him up ok? Good. But he was very manly to admit that. So he gets some manly for that.

And finally he was born on the atom Dave, if he was born from an atom with a cool name he would be manly. And lucky enough Dave is a cool name. So that is manly.

So lets do some math. (Oh gawd how do I do this again? I think I add this and then subtract by the same... ah screw it.) Thanks to me and my wonderful math skills, it appears that Manly is only 70% manly. So make sure you go and tell your friends that manly is 70%.

Tomorrow, join me in my theory about how smooth pang's skin is.

Perhaps I need to one day do a theory on why an edit button hasn't been added yet.

@ImTheMostManlyMan

You clearly have not read my comics in the AMW section.

My theory is that my ill-fated gym etiquette from about a month ago that got me banned for a while should not have been deleted because if it had been left on, everyone who saw it would have laughed so hard that they would suddenly gag out on themselves and realize that they should get off the computer and go do something with their lives like start a movement or find a cure for dyslexia, which is a good thing.
*catches breath*
That's my theory.

5'9 unfortunately. So Seems manly's height is not manly after all.

it appears that Manly is only 70% manly.

pang's Great Skin

I'm sure all of you are totally aware that pang's skin looks great and you always wonder how pang's skin feels. While I can't tell you how it feels, I can definitely tell you how smooth it is and I shall explain how smooth each body part of pang's really is. Now please follow me into my basement as I shall explain it.

As you all know, pang is a male female. For those of you who don't know, well now you know. Its difficult to tell the smoothness of pang's skin because pang is both genders, so I will first tell you the smoothest part of pang's skin. Ever wondered why pang hates his P to be capitalized? Well he hates it because it starts with the same letter as his smoothest body part(which he loves) that's right, pang's smoothest body part is pang's pinky. I mean why wouldn't it? pang always does crossfit with his pinky. Its obvious he keeps his pinky well smoothed.

Now lets do his most unsmooth... her most hairiest body part of all... her thigh. That's right, pang's most unsmooth body part is the thigh. Guess why. Chicken thigh. pang's most hated food in the whole world is chicken thigh. Because it reminds him of her unsmooth thigh. She can't help it if his thigh is too hairy and unsmooth. She thinks the creators of this dish are making fun of her, by making the chicken thigh fried, which represents pang's thigh, and the chicken thigh grilled, which represents his dream of her thigh being as smooth as... grilled chicken thigh. pang has hidden her shame ever since, but its ok pang... show the world your leg! Show the world how unsmooth it is and tell them you don't care!

And that my young padawans, is why pang should be respected. Join me next time in my theory about... Well its either a theory about Riptizoid101 or something else. You'll see when it comes.

Its been awhile since we discussed about users and their secrets. But that time has given me many ideas on theories. I will give the one which I promised last week.

Riptizoid's Bold Trap

I'm sure all of you know about Riptizoid's club/clan/crew/alliance/strip club. But do you know the reason for his making of the FGA? Well I'll explain it to you now.

I'm sure some of you know that some of the most active, popular, hot, strange, and feminine users are there. Well why are they there? To have fun with each other of course. But why did Rip invent the FGA? Well, would you believe me if I said its because he wants to make a trap? Of course you wouldn't because 'Rip is a nice guy' or 'Rip is too busy coming up with bad pickup lines to make a trap'. But I will explain it to you now.

As I've said before some very known users are there; pang, Storm, Sal, Gandalf, Nilo, Nurv, Matrix, me, etc. But what some of you may or may not know is that Moderators have also been there. I've seen 3 of them so far, Frank, Moe, and Devoid(I saw him once I don't know if he goes back anymore.). Rip invited them to the FGA, not knowing the trap they would soon be apart of. Rip gave each of the moderators a glass of wine, the most delicious wine in the world, but it was also the most drunkest(that's a word right?) wine in the world. The worst part is they even begged for more, so each sip only made them more dizzy and confused.

Another thing, the users again. Yes I've brought them up like 3 times now, you're probably screaming at me to get to the point with this. Well you see, Rip brought these users together because they're known by the community for their personalities. Rip wants to gain control of these users so he can be the ruler of the community. He wants the fame and the fortune but why does he want this? I will tell you the story of Rip, before he came to ArmorGames.

Riptizoid was sent to a school in Europe because he told too many bad pickup lines and it was becoming a nuisance, so they sent him to Europe because he was just so freaking annoying. Well the first day Rip got there, he was bullied and by bullied I mean he was poked alot... he doesn't like getting poked. Then a kid named Daniel Radcliffe stood up for him in the hallway after being poked by a gang. After that Daniel and Rip became best of friends. Or so he thought. One day while walking to his substitute home after school, Rip decided to walk into a dark alley for no complete reason. Then everything went wrong. Daniel jumped from behind a dumpster and surprised Rip. Rip was surprised at first but saw that it was just Daniel. But then Rip became the most scared he ever had in his life. Daniel poked him, hard. Rip moved to America the next year after hiding under a bridge, and discovered a horrible truth, Daniel Radcliffe became famous.

So Rip spent years plotting his revenge. But why on ArmorGames? Because there was a rumor that Daniel once said the word armor and games in the same year. So Rip decided to get revenge by controlling the ArmorGames community. He thought he could get revenge by doing this.

And that's my theory on Riptizoid's revenge. Join me next time for a theory about everyone's favorite unicorn.