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Serious advice from people I don't know.

Posted Jul 23, '14 at 10:44pm

samiel

samiel

431 posts

So I don't like to talk about personal issues with people close to me and I find that talking to an outside source can be helpful. So I have this issue and I have NO idea how to approach it. I noticed my girlfriend has at some point displayed all the tell tale signs of suffering sexual abuse. She has dealt with substance abuse, self abuse, mood swings, depressions, and I'm not quite sure what the official term for it is but she used sleep with a lot of guys, driven from what I believe to be trauma. I don't want her to have to keep it a secret, but I really have NO idea how to oproach the issue. I was just wondering if any body had any experience with this kind of thing and I was wondering if I get some advice.

 

Posted Jul 23, '14 at 11:00pm

EmperorPalpatine

EmperorPalpatine

9,475 posts

Sounds like a girl I know. Just be kind, caring, and supportive. Show that you're there for her. If she trusts you, you should be able to talk about the subject directly.

 

Posted Jul 23, '14 at 11:31pm

samiel

samiel

431 posts

True, but she has alot of pride and I don't think I can approach it head on. I actually did talk to my brother (He somehow only manages to date girls that have suffered trauma) and that was pretty much all he could tell me.*Sigh* Maybe I could stear the conversation one of these days, oh well geuss I'll just do what I can for now. I think I'll go play sushi cat to make myself feel better.

 

Posted Jul 24, '14 at 5:12am

MageGrayWolf

MageGrayWolf

9,798 posts

Knight

I've dated two girls who had been sexually abused and my mom when she was young had been sexually abused. You can straight up ask her. So long as you're supportive and respectful about it there shouldn't be any problems.

 

Posted Jul 25, '14 at 1:54am

samiel

samiel

431 posts

I've dated two girls who had been sexually abused and my mom when she was young had been sexually abused. You can straight up ask her. So long as you're supportive and respectful about it there shouldn't be any problems.

This is the first helpful thing other than "Be there" that i've heard.
 

Posted Jul 28, '14 at 4:32am

Jefferysinspiration

Jefferysinspiration

3,228 posts

I've dated two girls who had been sexually abused and my mom when she was young had been sexually abused. You can straight up ask her. So long as you're supportive and respectful about it there shouldn't be any problems.


This ^

Even if you don't feel comfortable asking out-right, just let her know that if there's something she ever wants to tell you or if there's something she really doesn't want to tell you, it's okay. It's okay for her to have her demons. And let her know if she does ever want to tell you it won't change anything.
 

Posted Jul 29, '14 at 2:54am

samiel

samiel

431 posts

Curiously she has stopped talking to me. I don't think it really matters but she just has such strange habits when it comes to me. She just really is........something else.

 
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