Forums → Art, Music, and Writing → Periodic Poetry Contest - Theme: Touch of Truth (Page 390, due Jan. 28)
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First, I will post the overall rules, and then I will post the specifics about this week.
Original rules, as stated by Ubertuna:
It must fit the week's theme.
It must be submitted by the deadline.
It cannot have inappropriate language in it.
It cannot be stolen (if you plagiarize, we will find you).
Also:
The poem must be created for this contest
A user cannot win two weeks in a row (though everyone is welcome to submit every week!)
Only one submission per user will be accepted
As we all know, the winner will recieve a merit, and their poem will be featured on the _Poetry_ page.
OK, on to this week's topic...Again, we are having a style instead of a theme. Also, this week we are having TWO WEEKS to do it, instead of the usual one. Why? Because this will be an EPIC poem. Or, rather, a parody of an epic poem. Generally, epic poetry is very long, and tells the serious story of a heroic figure. Well, this week, the epic figure is YOU! Write a long poem (I'll leave the definition of 'long' up to you, but give it a good go) about the heroic story of you! It can be silly, serious, whatever... just have fun with it. You have two weeks, so have a great time!
- 3,868 Replies
i want to ask.. how long does it take you guys to come up with each poem..
Um...depends. Took me 20min for my rough draft this time around. 40min to fine tune it.
how long does it take you guys to come up with each poem..
I haven't been doing this for long, this is my 3rd submission, I think? I didn't have a clue what I was going to write until I started. The first poem I wrote about the life cycle of a mountain/volcano that I had to stop in the middle and take a break. I went out side for some walking and thinking, came back to the computer and the rest just came to me.
I received positive critism because I'm no poet but the flow [no sarcasm intended] was there, just glitchy. The rhythm was hitting a few speed bumps but I knew if I kept working at writing more poems, in time I would find my own style.
So, don't get hung up on the time limits, just write from past experience or things you're familiar with, like family discussions, etc.
Try to pace yourself because some topics will come to you fsater than others. It's the same as when your studying a subject you're interested in vs a boring, heavy subject that seems overwhelming. When I pace myself through the boring and heavy tomes those are the ones I learn the most from, remember the best and longest. Perhaps it's a psychological exercise of sorts that I enjoy?
I'm sorry for the rant but I hope this has helped and besides, jump in and get your feet wet.
You may just find a new hobby that you'll have fun with?
It's the first kick a baby gives while still in the womb
It's the final words spoken before we go to the tomb
It's the kiss goodbye as we send our kids off to school
It's the warm embrace we share after a long day spent with tools
It's the kindness we give our neighbors while we cut our grass
It's the harshness we hurl at news of others kicking our country's @ss
It's the people walking and pounding the sidewalks going to work
It's the drivers stuck and waiting in autos on roads going beserk
It's the students daydreaming of a future after english, math and DNA
It's the graduates acceptance of prestigious institutions with a MBA
how long does it take you guys to come up with each poem..
Well, the first version I came up with took me just a few minute, it was literally visceral writing.
The second one was a little bit more fastidious to make, it took me about 30 to 40 minutes I guess...
As for the judging, the more time Alt takes to decide, the more it means our poems were good guys ^^.
I thought it was called the weekly poem contest.. how come it always takes two weeks? ARGH I HATE WAITING FOR THIS STUFF
Geez,this judging was so pathetically easy, it took me like 3 minutes! JAYKAY
Top three and one runner-up. The usual deal.
Getting 4th place, almost 3rd, almost 2nd, with poem tense and dramatic, 201 shows off his poetry skills with this piece!
I quickly run down the ally, not looking back
my footsteps splash loudly in the water below
I feel a sharp pain in my leg
followed be a loud bang.
I've been shot
my pulse is racing
I fall to the ground slowly
down on my knees.
I turn, and feel a bullet race by my face
just nipping the edge of my cheek
I try to stand up
but I am unable to stand the pain.
I fall to the ground once again
my pulse slows down
I feel calm
all my troubles are gone
suddenly, my spine aches like never before
once again followed by a loud bang
I shout in agony, with nobody to hear me
I hear my shooter walk closer and closer to me
He walks in front of me
and immediately, I am staring down the barrel of a gun
I feel a chill race throughout my entire body
and a shock wave smash through my organs
Boom!
and for the last second I am alive, I see how short my life was
how precious the memories were that I threw away long ago
but that's all over now.
My pulse goes to a sudden halt
the shooter kicks my dead corpse,
and rids the scene of the evidence
it's as if I never even existed.
You were being risky here, for sure. Free verse, no rhyme. But it's executed fairly well. The tension here is done perfectly - every line is soaked in the nervousness of a private at war. Punctuation is more important in a rhymeless and meterless poem like this, and your punctuation is solid for the most part, but there are a few placed where you could add a comma or a period to make the poem overall better. The first two stanzas especially are in need of punctuation.
The poem's life starts when conceived
In wombs of minds, from thoughtful seed:
That is the time its heart is formed
And beats for body parts unformed.
For birth has no less labor pains
To bring that mass of flesh and veins
To see the light of day and bawl--
Its heart pumps hard or not at all.
The loveliest of them are spared,
To summer days they are compared,
As others freeze in hibernation,
Stopping hearts for inspiration.
And all the rest, aborted things,
Are drowned in ever-bubbling springs.
No blood is shed--hearts palpitate--
No, Lethe's fate is more sedate.
For them the silent darkness shall await.
Another great composition from Parsat. As usual, your rhymes are acrobatic, and your rhythm is formed quite well. The way you follow the theme is creative and cool. You're able to craft a poem, as usual, with a wonderful meter or rhyme to accompany it. Your poem is agonizingly close to 201 and Zoark's poems, and it took me a while to decide this placing.
With his 2nd poem and an admirable repertoire of words and rhytmes, we have Zoark with a narrow second place over 201 and Parsat's poems!
Haemodystopia
I call my position
trudging this vile corpse
as an unpaid physician
Ambitions and dreams
not designed for me
the constrictive endothelium
is all I can see
The closest to aspirations
I will consume
removal of a fluid
by a vacuum
A virulent overlord
controls without knowledge
unable to refuse
I am part of the sewage
I resent my existence
yet I cannot cease
even my actions
are controlled by the beast
I inhabit and maintain
without my skill
this decrepit carcass
would surely be nil
If I could rebel
form a mutiny
I would be hunted
destroyed by family
Alas and alack
at the end of my life
replaced without thought
tenderness nor strife
I adore it when people stretch the theme and come up with something great like this. You've created a rhythmic spell, a magical meter and rhyme, and a tension amplified by the acrobatic rhyming and vocabulary. I can't stress enough how much I love how you can float on the surface of dark mood without slashing your wrists and listening to Fall Out Boy. Everything present here works towards creating an eerie atmosphere. Fantastico. My only criticism would be that you don't use any punctuation, which can add a lot to the flow. But you've crafted this well enough that it doesn't have a huge impact on the flow of the poem, which is great either way.
And a close win - almost a tie between 3rd and 2nd place, we have Fallen with a pulsating submission!
A doleful soul is rocked by a pulse;
Mournfullness
Dismalness
As precious as a diamond in a bulse
Echoing in this nourishing water
The beat is unbearable
And I'm left to dabble
Given food, food for thoughts meager
Its been there since it started living;
Dejected
Depressed
Engrossed in a boredom ever flourishing
Bathed in the reverberant sounds
Of the outer and the inner
My sanity of a few pounds
Keeps me wriggling like a dreamer
It waits and ponders, helpless and alone;
Boredom
Tedium
Both dead and alive in the distinct tone
A sudden churning is moving my body
Am I finally getting out?
Escaping this captive bout
At last, light douses my eyes vividly
But the faitful bearer died by giving birth;
Gleefully
Joyfully
A discordant sacrifice of no less mirth
Now how I miss that ubiquitous pulse
Cooped up in that haven's heat
Surrounded by the organic dulse
Where are you mommy, I miss that beat...
There's a Dwight Shcruteness to this poem, because he too recounts his birth in an episode of The Office. The pulse here is living - it makes me feel like an erythrocyte, or a right ventricle in the heart of a newborn. Like the other members of the top three, you have acrobatic rhythm, rhyme, and vocabulary, and the addition of the offbeat pulse running through it all gives a primordial life to this piece. It's slick, smooth, sophisticated, and wins a narrow first place over almost everybody else who entered this round.
Beecause of the large number of quality poems, Imma make a list of honorable mentions who I wanted to place.
Wolf1991
Moonfairy
Wajor59
LEGEND_beast
Coldplaya
Hectichermit
All of you guys on this list were as good as the people who ended up in the top four here. I must congratulate the AG poetry community for being as awesome as at least 27 simultaneous sneezes.
Fallen, get yer merit~~~
New Theme: Shock
Deadline: Friday two weeks from now, unless the entries are as awesome as the ones in this round, where the submissions end with the judging post. Judging over the weekend, as usual.
DAMN IT!! I fucking needed that merit really badly! Oh well I guess.
Wow...It means a lot given the overall quality of the submissions, this was quite a struggle...
I feel bad for wolf though, his piece of work intimidated me into thinking it'd sweep its way through to the top!
Nonetheless, congratulation to everyone, and thanks again to Alt for another wonderful judging!
Good luck to all for next round.
**** IT!! I ****ing needed that merit really badly! Oh well I guess.
Who needs a merit? What are you going to do with one?
Just saying.
Now see, Fallen, we encouraged you to spend just a few more minutes on your original and it paid off.
2014631, your merit is coming! I'm affraid the heat is really on because "shock" rocks for a topic!
Thank you Alt, I'm honored with an honerable mention this round.
OK everyone, let's have some fun...
I would take my hat off to you, alas I am not wearing one. Bien fait mon ami!
Wait so only the person who came in first gets one merit? *sob *cry
*disappointed *Swears angrily *walks away (
Thanks wolf, I wish you the best of luck for Parsat's up with you on this round ^^.
Shock
I wake up to find blood every where
And I could do nothing all else but stare
As I whimper and cried, Â i started to pray
For i felt my very own life drain away
As I knew that my time has come
To go back what I came from
I neared the end of my adventure
But nothing else but the dark to venture
My life now feels so old
Now I feel nothing but the cold
Thread is locked!