Thanks for the entries, guys! Since I'm already a little late I'll post judging immediately. I think Blue Elephant really enjoyed reading them, and all of them made me laugh for different reasons. I won't post rationale this time, but if you want feedback I will be certainly happy to give it.
Here are the results:
Bronze: ChromeDeathRazor
Silver: Maverick4
Gold: Nichodemus
Ivory: MagicTree
Congrats, MagicTree, for the win. Wordplay, they say, is the lowest form of humor, but I'm a person of low tastes.
For the last contest of the year, we're going to be doing something a little different. The theme for the rest of 2012 is going to be "Year's Best." Basically, I want you to look through all the poems that you've written this year, pick one that you like the best, and revise it before submitting. If you haven't written anything this year you're satisfied by, don't let 2012 be a disappointment! This is the only contest where the "original submission" rule will be waived. I want to see your best work. Submissions will close Tuesday, January 1, 2013.