ForumsArt, Music, and WritingPeriodic Poetry Contest - Theme: Touch of Truth (Page 390, due Jan. 28)

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DragonMistress
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DragonMistress
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Blacksmith

First, I will post the overall rules, and then I will post the specifics about this week.

Original rules, as stated by Ubertuna:

It must fit the week's theme.
It must be submitted by the deadline.
It cannot have inappropriate language in it.
It cannot be stolen (if you plagiarize, we will find you).


Also:

The poem must be created for this contest
A user cannot win two weeks in a row (though everyone is welcome to submit every week!)
Only one submission per user will be accepted

As we all know, the winner will recieve a merit, and their poem will be featured on the _Poetry_ page.


OK, on to this week's topic...Again, we are having a style instead of a theme. Also, this week we are having TWO WEEKS to do it, instead of the usual one. Why? Because this will be an EPIC poem. Or, rather, a parody of an epic poem. Generally, epic poetry is very long, and tells the serious story of a heroic figure. Well, this week, the epic figure is YOU! Write a long poem (I'll leave the definition of 'long' up to you, but give it a good go) about the heroic story of you! It can be silly, serious, whatever... just have fun with it. You have two weeks, so have a great time!
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Parsat
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Parsat
2,180 posts
Blacksmith

Alt has contacted me to take on judging duties from now on, because, good student he is, he's quite busy. I will release my judging in a moment.

I will also say that although I'll be judging, there will almost certainly be times where I will not be able to judge due to my own duties. In those cases, I will attempt to take the initiative to contact a competent, active poet around here to conduct a guest judging. This will hopefully have the effect of mixing things up a bit and prevent delays.

Zaork
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Zaork
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Nomad

Huzzah! Are you taking control of the reins permanently? Or will Alt return?

Parsat
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Parsat
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Blacksmith

Yes, I will be the poetry judge from now on, until I inevitably get burnt out.

All of the poems that I read, with few exceptions, were images of despair, of struggle, and of the will to survive. There's something about the water and the fact that it can be the begetter of life and death that captivates us. So without further ado, let the judging commence!

Bronze: The Remnants of Colonialism--Zaork


This is where the title goes
The poem is further down below

Listen closely and you'll hear
The cries of seamen from the pier
The noblemen who sacrificed
The very essence of their life
It is not a tale of woe
A mere warning from below

Each year the fleeting boats return
To the ocean to roil and churn
The feeble minds of commandeers
Leaves a taste of dying tears
Profit sought and profit gained
But none to use for none remained

Children left on the shore
Telling tales of grand rapport
Their fathers battling 'gainst the tide
For the purpose of some pride
The truth of which they will not learn
'till they surrender what they yearn

A parade leaves earthen land
Leaving past, present, sand
Hoping to glean of a time
Something past the threat of grime
For when they venture past the eye
There is not place to say goodbye

Floating on enclosed wood
Given the rights a coffin should
Surrender to the wroth of swell
Before the chiming of the bell
Marching, enveloped in the sea
Left with ambiguity

This is not a tale of woe
But a warning from below


While Zaork hails from lands down under, I know in America that colonialism is heavily romanticized as a momentous event in history...from the youngest ages we are those "children left on the shore" being told "tales of grand rapport," and we fail to realize the bleakness, and in some cases, the destructiveness that this colonialism lead to. This, I feel, is the heart of the poem, and in an age where we think we have explored every corner of this earth and ready to move on to the outer realms, this serves to remind us of the pain and the cost and the will we need to move past the Earth.

Silver: An Uncertain Evolution--wolf1991


Resurfaced

Here be the depths that we have crawled
To wake on this broken shore.
Where blood has run and men have cried
Forgotten hopes, dashed dreams and more.

Blasted iron sky, that once was iron blue
When we sang beneath the waves.
When dreams were far and we were young
And drowned men spoke of haunted graves.

Where rhythm beats a lost on lonely hearts
And the days are nothing new to us
So that we are tempted to crawl onto blasted shore
So that these metal workings be wonderous.

Ah sweet and bitter taint that was once us.
Once where things we above us, when we were new.
When we hid beneath the sea, the cold hearted mistress
That stole our souls and made us pay our due.

Oh, but we be wiser now. For the years have passed us.
And this forsaken land shall we haunt
And give those who hold life dear something to dread.
Something to make there lives seem to be a taunt.

Where in the ramblings of our minds,
Of our hearts and souls that be forfeit.
We will ponder no more our underwater prison
Of that place we shall forget.

We pray you heed these dark words well
We pray that you know our cause
For we will walk on this dead shore forever now
And should you see us, your life shall pause.



This poem harkens back to the image of the primeval, that first creature emerging from the depths onto a deserted land. And indeed, we see from the poem that little has changed from that first terrestrial encounter. The world is still a bitter struggle of the fittest, but where claws and teeth were once our weapons, they have been replaced by "metal workings" and iron. Great use of metaphor, although it would have been greatly helped by a more "epic" meter.

Gold: Broken Cog in the Machine--FallenSky


You are all alone in the crowd;
Unhindered by the bureaucrat's rhythm
However hard you desire not to go
Your thoughts are on the treadmill of you feet
For you dance that step in a sluggish fashion

A day like any other, but not less special;
You did not dream of never waking up
So upon that marvelous night of emptiness
You build the base of a succesful journey
Men at work, drink your coffee, drink it

And as the metro follows its course
You ponder why you were rewarded
With a night of dreamless sleep
Just enough thinking to make you dense;
Which is very few, almost naught in fact

All the thoughts they made you miss
That station so important
So you wonder where you'll end up;
Surely in a coffin if not at work
But a little change might not hurt

As the metro stop, free from all its people
You descend as the last of them robots
Wind yourself up and climb the stairs
To a sunny beach nearing water
Is it worth living the same day over, you wonder

You take off your brown and shiny shoes
To feel the life between your toes
The churning warmth of the earth
Melts into refreshing cold
As you march into the sea, never to come back

What will the boss say?
What will your colleagues think?
You don't care as your nose fills up
And all becomes terribly white
Surprisingly blank...

You slowly open your eyes, in an hospital bed
Your muscles weak from months of sleep
The woman sighting vacantly near
Let go a scream of surprise
And start to cry as she rush towards you

Doctors flow in the colorless room promptly
To witness the miracle
And as you're clueless, you think;
''That first breath tasted like
I just passed a few minutes underwater...''


I felt that this poem seemed to break the mold in everything it did. The free verse, the unusual repetitions, and the settings it posed, where the theme was individuality in the midst of conformity... It sets up with an excellent beginning about the banality of life, but when the character steps out he steps onto a sight that one would not expect to see. Instead of ignoring it, he moves on...and he becomes the spectacle. He becomes the man who experiences joy for life, not life for joy. And that is different. I corrected a few spelling mistakes, but it doesn't give you an excuse to give yourself crap about your control over the English language. Congratulations, Fallen, and please contact a mod for your merit.

Our next theme, due two weeks from now (October 4, AG time), will be Mythology. And just to spark ideas, remember that mythology isn't just limited to the Egyptians, the Greeks, or the Norse. Do a little research, and explore mythology: Chinese, Japanese, Arthurian, West African, Aztec, Mayan, Native American...the list goes on. Hope to see you guys then!
FallenSky
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FallenSky
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Peasant

Parsat being judge of the poetry thread; I always felt something like that was bound to happen sooner or later.

I corrected a few spelling mistakes


Sorry, I have this bad habit of not rereading my posts before posting them, and this other habit of checking my keyboard while typing hence the little flaws in my grammar ^^.
Thanks a lot, and good luck to all for next theme!

Parsat
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Parsat
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Blacksmith

Parsat being judge of the poetry thread; I always felt something like that was bound to happen sooner or later.


It's happened way sooner. I was judge of this contest from August to October of 2009. After that, I conducted three emergency judgings for wistress and moabarmorgamer when they were judges. So it's nothing new to me. If I'm not mistaken, I started the trend of naming the places after various metals/materials in contest.[citation needed]
wajor59
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wajor59
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Nomad

Thanks Parsat for judging. I had a feeling Fallen's was going to win a merit.
Mythology is going to be fun and I don't which to choose. I feel like a kid in the mall at Christmas time.

HahiHa
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HahiHa
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Regent

Mythology? Wee, what a great theme to try my first poem! 2 weeks should be enough to avoid making it a failure^^

FallenSky
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FallenSky
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Peasant

It's happened way sooner. I was judge of this contest from August to October of 2009. After that, I conducted three emergency judgings for wistress and moabarmorgamer when they were judges. So it's nothing new to me. If I'm not mistaken, I started the trend of naming the places after various metals/materials in contest.[citation needed]

Sorry Parsat, I had various bouts of unactivity in the past, hence my meager 3000 Ap even given my ancienty on this site ^^. That and the fact I'm all but a spammer.

wolf1991
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wolf1991
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Farmer

This poem harkens back to the image of the primeval, that first creature emerging from the depths onto a deserted land. And indeed, we see from the poem that little has changed from that first terrestrial encounter. The world is still a bitter struggle of the fittest, but where claws and teeth were once our weapons, they have been replaced by "metal workings" and iron. Great use of metaphor, although it would have been greatly helped by a more "epic" meter.


Duely noted. Thank you for the review. And I'm still trying to figure out how I managed to place.
1337Player
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1337Player
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Peasant

Congratulations to Fallen for winning this Poetry contest! And to the others that tried so hard(-ly).
I've never entered into the Poetry contest before, so give me a few days to work on this. Er yeah. Mythology is it? *Researching*
*Cough* I'm not going to be the first one posting my poem...

wolf1991
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wolf1991
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Farmer

The Myth of Love

Come all ye who hath looked upon greatness
And see that the truth of love is naught
But an never ending series of unyielding compromise.
Wherein that which is strong, is but riddled
With holes that doth break upon the waves of commitment.

You all stand amazed by such profound thoughts
Such as love. Dearest of fools you be, for what is great
About the suffering of men who hath given themself
Whole heartedly to some sordid affair in which
Their beating breast lies bare and broken.

Wherein all that speak of freedom, shall find
The slovers noose shortly 'round thy neck.
And they call this love. 'Tis but slavery dear fools.
You know naught of what you hath wrought in the peril
Of such profound and misguided trust in another.

To submit, they claim, is but the noble act in itself.
To submit, I claim, is to lie broken and bleeding
Upon the side of the road. While those who hath found
What all those seek pass on by. Nary a word to be said
To those who suffer so miserably at the behest of others.

Love. Oh how we misguided ourselves into thinking it,
Of all things, was the noble purpose by which we live.
Fear this purpose no more. For I have come to free you
From such dellusions such as love. Dear fools who hearken
At my door unceasing. Love is the lie that all men tell.

Do not live within love.
Do not give heed to love.
Do not accept love.

Love is the god of our new religion.
Love is the religion of man.
Love is naught but a lie.

Freakenstein
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Freakenstein
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Jester

I very much wanna participate in this....I got some ideas, but I need time to think. It would take me time away from the awaiting of permission for Beta, of course. Maybe through this poetry, I can use the ideas from this poem to directly put into the story itself! Shweet... *downs a pill*

thisisnotanalt
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thisisnotanalt
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Shepherd

Well, I'm glad I was able to judge the poetry contest for a while~

Judges come and go . . . and Parsat is an awesome one. I look forward to entering whenever I have the opportunity, and show the newer entrants Altian style to the max.

Parsat
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Parsat
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Blacksmith

By the way, I promised you guys some research I did. Basically, there are a few ways to measure judge performance:

1. Number of judgings: People who can do more before burning out might be better at judging, although it runs the risk of going stale.
2. Average time from setting theme to posting the judging.
3. Median time.
4. Standard deviation. The higher the standard deviation, the more erratically the judge tends to judge.

Note that in this data, judging done by another person is attributed to the judge who started the theme, because this was the time needed to get somebody else to judge the contest.

So here's the list, with the above points in order.

DragonMistress: 8 judgings, 10.375 day average, 9 day median, 4.98 SD. Shortest 6 days, longest 21 days.
Strop: 5 judgings, 10.2 day average, 10 day median, 2.68 SD. Shortest 6 days, longest 13 days.
UberTuna: 9 judgings, 12.2 day average, 8 day median, 7.56 SD. Shortest 6 days, longest 23 days.
NoNameC68: Only judged one contest, which he never got around to judging. It was finally judged by Adrecka33 after 38 days.
Adrecka33: 5 judgings, 10.6 day average, 10 day median, 2.79 SD. Shortest 8 days, longest 14 days.
Wistress: 7 judgings, 8.5 day average, 9 day median, 1.61 SD. Shortest 7 days, longest 11 days. First judge to be a nonconsecutive judge.
Parsat: 5 judgings, 15.4 day average, 13 day median, 7.09 SD. Shortest 9 days, longest 26 days.
Moabarmorgamer: 15 judgings, 9.4 day average, 7 day median, 3.92 SD. Shortest 6 days, longest 15 days.
thisisnotanalt: 12 judgings, 14.4 day average, 13.5 day median, 5.02 SD. Shortest 9 days, longest 22 days.

Overall, it took judges an average of 11.7 days to judge. This is not all that bad. And yes, if you look at the data, I am probably the least timely judge out of them all, with the highest average time spent on judging.

Here's a chart on how every judge did on each judging:

http://i477.photobucket.com/albums/rr134/Parsat/judgingtime.png

Kinda messy to read, but you can see from this data that most judges start well and then spike up as they lose interest. From these results, we can formulate a general Model of Judge Behavior.

http://i477.photobucket.com/albums/rr134/Parsat/judgemodel.png

Although no judge has gone on long enough for the data to be conclusive, my guess is that if you go long enough, the behavior of a judge is like a sine curve: Ideally the only thing keeping them from judging is busyness, and not a lack of interest. If that is the case, then you would expect to see peaks where the judge is busy and dips where they have time. Perhaps, in the most ideal situation, it would be a straight line, because they would remember to call someone else to judge for them.

Unfortunately, the data does not support this. Instead, in the scenarios we have, judge behavior takes on the form of a logistic function, where it is easy to get involved at the start. After that, there's generally a rather sudden increase when combined pressures of life and general "don't feel like it" moods result in delayed judging.

Hypermnestra
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Hypermnestra
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Nomad

Pretty colors...

But dang you must have a lot of time on your hands. It would seem that Moabarmorgamer is the best judge as of yet, not as in judging, but in terms of timeliness and length of judging.

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