ForumsArt, Music, and WritingPitch White

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Ajal
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Ajal
135 posts
Nomad

We were just leaving the house, Me and my little sister, Not knowing what this day would have in store. I am in grade 8 but she is in grade 2. Our schools are close, About a 3 minute walk away. i walk her to school now. We were walking down our walkway and we heard a loud smash. It was across the road, in Sarah Snapps house. Sarah is a 35 year old woman. She is nice enough she bakes us Christmas cookies. Although they taste like Dog Droppings and are hard as rock we still appreciate them. Mom was still outside saying good bye to us and told us to go over to see if everything was alright.

My bratty little sister, Carry, said she was too scared to go over. Stupid excuse, Atleast mine was good, I told her we were late.

Mom said she would go over and see what happened.

  • 8 Replies
Zophia
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Zophia
9,435 posts
Scribe

Hmm, somewhat interesting but very short and cut off. I assume this was either done on a whim, or to be continued?

Ajal
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Ajal
135 posts
Nomad

Be continued, I am afraid my computer will shut down while i am writing.

plokkey
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plokkey
4,572 posts
Jester

Be continued, I am afraid my computer will shut down while i am writing.


Save your files?? Nice story so far.
firetail_madness
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firetail_madness
20,593 posts
Blacksmith

Need to improve your grammar and capitalization a little bit, but it's very suspenseful, you chose a good spot to stop.

firetail_madness
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firetail_madness
20,593 posts
Blacksmith

Also, I'm interested to know why you called it "Pitch White"

plokkey
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plokkey
4,572 posts
Jester

Well obviously he didn't finish the story so you wouldn't know.

firetail_madness
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firetail_madness
20,593 posts
Blacksmith

That means he must have thought over what the rest of the story would be about, or else the title would be irrelevant. I'm going to take that the title has something to do with the incident, but I'm not sure.

Write on!

plokkey
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plokkey
4,572 posts
Jester

Be continued, I am afraid my computer will shut down while i am writing.


I would say he already has the story in mind.
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