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An Emotional Story Part-2

Posted Aug 28, '09 at 8:05pm

Moabarmorgamer

Moabarmorgamer

8,674 posts

Sonny, could I re-write your Repent for Something story? So I could show you what might be a little better for your next story?(there will be a next story, right?)

 

Posted Aug 28, '09 at 8:26pm

Moabarmorgamer

Moabarmorgamer

8,674 posts

Here, sonny. Just to give you an idea of what might help your next story. Stronger vocabulary, less spaces and periods. That will help you.

Once there was a boy. His name was Jason, and he was not like other boys. He constantly irritated his family, abusing others and swearing. He was a disgrace. Once his father was given policy papers and money of another person. He kept it on the table in his room and went out. As Jason saw it he tried to open it to see what is in it. When he opened it a huge amount of cash came out. Fear gripped his heart. Afraid he would be arrested, he ran to America, seeking sanctuary, and leaving his family behind.
But his father became the scapegoat for Jason's crime. He was sent to jail for attempting to steal money, which Jason had done. And his father said not a word against his son. He still loved his son, after all he had done. And he suffered in prison.
His son got very hurt because his father was getting punished because of his faults.
His son felt pain and regret. His father was being punished because of Jason's own faults, taking the blame for something he didn't do. And he felt this because despite his delinquent ways, he still felt awful for what he had done. He wanted to repent for this serious mistake. He went to be admitted in the U.S. Army. After two years of service, Jason did a very brave and selfless thing, saving his own regiment. For this, he was awarded the Medal of Honor, and earned respect and power among the military. Now was his time to repent for what he had done. With tears flowing from his eyes, the former delinquent stepped into his car.
His falsely accused father was escorted out of prison with two guards, for a walk. He had watched many prisoners leaving, bailed by their relatives. And every time he had hoped and prayed that his son would come and save him, that he would repent. For two years he had hoped this. But now he knew his son would never come. And still his father felt sad. What had happened to his son? Would he ever see him again? Burying his head in his hands, the father felt very alone.
Then a shining car came towards the jail. Jason's father wistfully thought how lucky some man must be, to have a relative so powerful, thoughtful, and respectful he could bail him out of jail. But when his once-disgraceful son stepped out of the car, the father was flabbergasted, and his eyes were filled with tears of joy and happiness both. His son came to him, and he too had tears in his eyes.
"Father...I am sorry," Jason said, bowing his head in sadness and respect. And he took his father home, a father who could be proud of his son for once.

By Sonnydude

 

Posted Aug 30, '09 at 9:34pm

VoteSocialist

VoteSocialist

994 posts

This story makes me laugh very hard at times...:)

 

Posted Jan 10, '10 at 8:08am

SonnyDude

SonnyDude

312 posts

Thanx Moat, my next story will be like this....

 

Posted Feb 28, '10 at 9:40am

SonnyDude

SonnyDude

312 posts

Hey plzz give an idea of an Emotional story, so I can write one.

 

Posted Aug 10, '12 at 5:15am

SonnyDude

SonnyDude

312 posts

Waiting For another Story???

'An Emotional Story Part- 3'

 

Posted May 30, '14 at 5:41am

SonnyDude

SonnyDude

312 posts

Hey!!! I am back.

 

Posted May 31, '14 at 7:05am

SonnyDude

SonnyDude

312 posts

You can post your emotional stories here too!!!

 

Posted Jul 1, '14 at 2:49pm

SonnyDude

SonnyDude

312 posts

Where are all the story lovers??

 

Posted Oct 5, '14 at 9:53am

SonnyDude

SonnyDude

312 posts

Yo I'm Back to write another story.

Will come shortly......

 
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