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The Many Uses of OctoCan - The Best Canned Octopus In The World!

Posted May 29, '12 at 8:56pm

warriorcats123

warriorcats123

108 posts

lady and tramp 2 song player
when you want to hear a song throughm that move just open up the can and stair into the octopusses eyes and it plays the song you want

 

Posted May 30, '12 at 11:45pm

CommanderPaladin

CommanderPaladin

506 posts

#216: Wormhole Portal (a.k.a. "Boom Tube")
     Need to get to the other side of the universe in a hurry?  Open up an OctoCan Wormhole!  Just toss the Octo into the air and state your desired destination.  The Octo's tentacles will adhere themselves to the fabric of space/time, then pull open a portal to the specified location.  Just jump in and go - it's that simple. 
     Warning: Neither the Manufacturer nor the OctoCan Clan is responsible for injury or damage caused if you incorrectly use the OctoCan Portal and end up creating a quantum singularity that sucks up the entire universe, compresses it to the size in a single quark, and then spits it out into an interdimensional nether-region.  Use with proper caution.

 

Posted May 31, '12 at 5:37pm

warriorcats123

warriorcats123

108 posts

spam reporter
tierd of spam open the can and the octopus will do it for you

 

Posted Jun 1, '12 at 12:03pm

light_chaser

light_chaser

659 posts

#218:  Spammer killer,

Ever had someone spam your perfectly legitimate thread?  Ever wanted to kill that troll who is killing your thread?  Well, your in luck!  Because the killer OctoCan with knives on all 8 of its arms, will kill the troll/spammer!

Warning:  OctoCan corp. is not responsible for injuries or lawsuits resulting from improper use of this product.

 

Posted Jun 3, '12 at 10:32am

xAyjAy

xAyjAy

1,683 posts

#219: octo-trainer

are you tired of your diets? do you want to look like a bodybuilder? then buy a can of the new trainer-OctoCan! open the can and put the octos on your body and the octos will move for you! lose fat in a week! look like a bodybuilder in three days!

warning: using this product can tire you out.

 

Posted Jul 15, '12 at 3:47pm

Pieguyme

Pieguyme

542 posts

220. pie. step 1. open can.
step 2. dump in pie crust.
step 3. bake.
step 4. serve. DELICIOUS PIE! YUMMMMMM!

 

Posted Jul 15, '12 at 9:43pm

Bladerunner679

Bladerunner679

1,343 posts

#221: little girl screamer

have you ever wanted to make the sound "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" like a little girl, but your voice is too low? not anymore with OCTOCAN! This amazing will force the octo into your throat, and alter your voice so you can make any sound you want. hooray.

warning: we are not responsible if the sound you make happens to bring about your demise.

-Blade

 

Posted Jul 15, '12 at 9:58pm

Darkfire45

Darkfire45

2,343 posts

#222. Ink Cannon

Trying to defeat the enemy but ran out of ammo? Lost all your weapons during a battle? Then open up a can of Octocan! Just by holding the octopus towards your enemy and squeezing it's head, it'll blast some ink towards them. You can also adjust the volume of the ink by pulling on a tentacle.

Caution: Ink is not dangerous and will not kill your enemy. Octocan is not responsible for any injuries caused by the enemy after use of it.

 

Posted Jul 18, '12 at 11:49am

warriorcats123

warriorcats123

108 posts

223 muteapus
ever wanted your family to mute the computer but they wont not a problem with the new muteapus just hit the computer speakers with uteapus and vola it is muted
warning octocan is not responible for damege to you your family speakers or anything else dameged

 

Posted Jul 19, '12 at 1:13pm

acmed

acmed

1,921 posts

224. OctoPhone

Have an annoyingly large family. Can't wish them a Merry Christmas fast enough? Well OctoCan provides the world's best 8 ear cellular device Octopus phone in the world!

Warning: Do not wrap OctoCords around neck. OctoCan does not like that.

 
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