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The Many Uses of OctoCan - The Best Canned Octopus In The World!

Posted Nov 30, '12 at 1:27pm

MagicTree

MagicTree

773 posts

258: OctoCan-dy
Have a sweet tooth but are allergic to dairy? Can't stand liquorice? Then OctoCandy is for you! With enchanced, 74% more sugar-filled tentacles, marshmellow eyes, ice-cream ink and much more, this delish fish is perfect for sweet-tooths everywhere. Get it now!

 

Posted Dec 3, '12 at 11:41pm

theEPICgameKING

theEPICgameKING

1,017 posts

#259: Japanese Culture
Something so original, JapanOctoCan is here! Simply open it up, and learn first-hand just what role octopi play in Japanese society.
DANGER! DANGER! KEEP ALL FEMALES AT LEAST 500 FEET AWAY. OctoCorp is NOT responsible for any injury, etc. Caused by marital relations between a JapanOcto and a girl.

 

Posted Dec 4, '12 at 5:36am

PwnajLeadah981

PwnajLeadah981

634 posts

260. Energy Source
Running out of fuel? Use OctoCan's OctoInk! It can instantly adapt to any fueltank and it has an unlimited use! An OctoCan also comes in as a decoration.

 

Posted Dec 4, '12 at 3:34pm

MagicTree

MagicTree

773 posts

#259: Japanese Culture
Something so original, JapanOctoCan is here! Simply open it up, and learn first-hand just what role octopi play in Japanese society.
DANGER! DANGER! KEEP ALL FEMALES AT LEAST 500 FEET AWAY. OctoCorp is NOT responsible for any injury, etc. Caused by marital relations between a JapanOcto and a girl.

I did that! Look;
248. Octo!Japan
Do you love Japan? Do you love OctoCan? Well now, with Octo!Japan, you can have two of them in one irresistible little manga-style octopus! Octo!Japan can speak and write fluent Japanese, it's ink is perfect for hirigana, kangi and katakana characters and you can even chop off some of it's tentacles for instant sushi! What's not to love about Octo!Japan?


261: Evolutionary Line:
Is your average OctoCan boring you? Do you wish that OctoCan had 8 more legs or a third eye? OctoLution is a new product, that comes with many different parts! You may get an eye, or a few tentacles of wings to add to your squishy friend! Then apply the parts (with OctoInk glue of course!) and wait a few days before the OctoCan can fully use these new parts. It'll make any OctoCan special!
Note: Parts differ from packs.

263: OctoLotion!
Is your skin not smooth enough for you? Is the sun burning you? Just apply OctoLotion to your body and wait for brilliant results to emerge!
Note: OctoLotion may or may not contain OctoPoop. Heh heh.
 

Posted Dec 4, '12 at 4:45pm

theEPICgameKING

theEPICgameKING

1,017 posts

Oh. Did not notice that.
Redo #259: Octoboxing
Take this sport up a notch with the OctoBoxer! Comes with matching set of red and blue trunks. Send him into the ring with another OctoBoxer and watch them duke it out with their tentacles! Compete in the NOBC (National OctoBoxing Championship)! Winner gets a free OctoCan!

 

Posted Dec 4, '12 at 5:43pm

StormWalker

StormWalker

6,539 posts

#264: Having trouble with your car? Or maybe your ride-a-mower? Maybe you're computer's too slow. Well, with this Octocan/magic edition, all you have to do is let the Octo go to work, squeezing its slimy tentacles through whatever needs fixing. WARNING: Not to be used in ways involving lemons. SIDE NOTE: And not lemons the fruit, either. Lemons the I-don't-feel-like-explaining.

 

Posted Dec 4, '12 at 6:27pm

pokemonrocks126

pokemonrocks126

484 posts

265
unhacker
mad at a hacker want revenge use this new product just put it on your computer and it will get rid of the hack then it will go to the hacker and grow huge and tourte the hacker with things like chinese water tourtre and tickle tourtue then it will do grusume horrid things to the hacker then pop it open with its tentecales

 

Posted Dec 4, '12 at 6:43pm

StormWalker

StormWalker

6,539 posts

#266- Bothered by people sending Unhacker Octos at you? Being tickled and being popped open with 'tentecales'? Well, buy this SUPEREPICPIANOSHIELD varation of Octocan! Just swallow the Octo live, and you will suddenly sprout piano keys out of your mouth! These piano keys will prevent the Unhacker Octo from getting anywhere near you, and the unfortunate torturor Octo will be gnashed to a pulp!
WARNING:Effects are permanent.

 

Posted Dec 5, '12 at 9:26pm

pokemonrocks126

pokemonrocks126

484 posts

267 your unhacker octo just get pwned well send this out its the new unbeatbleultimateunhackerocto

not only will it do the same things as the original it will be amune to paino teeth and anything else

 

Posted Dec 6, '12 at 2:49pm

MagicTree

MagicTree

773 posts

267 your unhacker octo just get pwned well send this out its the new unbeatbleultimateunhackerocto

not only will it do the same things as the original it will be amune to paino teeth and anything else


This is SPAM. And this has happened before. Don't make me report you.

268: OctoCan: 2012 edition.
Is the apocalypse getting on your nerves? Do you want the End of The World to be a bit smoother? All you need is a packet of OctoCan: 2012 Edition! This mighty Octo will protect you from any apocalypse. Zombie Invasion? Sorted. Armageddon? Done. Last Judgement from God/gods? No problem. This Octo will supply you with food, weapons, vaccines and mercy from the gods. No need to worry about December 22nd, because of new OctoCan: 2012 Edition!
 
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