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The Many Uses of OctoCan - The Best Canned Octopus In The World!

Posted Nov 29, '11 at 7:45pm

dair5

dair5

2,479 posts

Fashion

Ever worry about going to school and nkt having anything good to wear? Well with octocan you can go to school and feel confident that you're the best looking person there. Wear it as a hat! Shoes! Gloves! Even as pants! The possibilities are endless!

Warning: octocan can do nothing for people who are already ugly. Do not apply octocan to hair if you have hair, and do use as pants if you are male.

 

Posted Nov 30, '11 at 10:08pm

aamer13

aamer13

263 posts

44. cool candiate name.

want to go up for presidant make octocan your name it sounds cool

this message had brought to you by: ohhhh yeaaaaaa

 

Posted Dec 1, '11 at 1:48am

CommanderPaladin

CommanderPaladin

506 posts

45. Game Assist
Ever play a computer game where you have to push a bunch of buttons really fast and you can't keep up?  Release your OctoCan onto the keyboard, and watch your score multiply!

 

Posted Dec 1, '11 at 5:44am

xAyjAy

xAyjAy

1,683 posts

46. house builder

dont you have enougth money to buy a house? cant you even rent one? OctoCan is the answer! just buy a can of the new Constructor-OctoCan and he builds everything you want!

 

Posted Dec 4, '11 at 6:52pm

aamer13

aamer13

263 posts

47: wig

Are you bald , well Octocan can't help.

this message has been brought to you by: ohhhh yeaaaaaa

 

Posted Dec 4, '11 at 11:32pm

CommanderPaladin

CommanderPaladin

506 posts

^ Aamer, OctoCan can do anything!  And since this thread is about what all it can do, your post is kind of like spam to the subject.

Here's a rework to get things back on track:

47.1: Wig
Are you bald?  OctoCan can help!  Just use the octopus as a wig, or if you want you can use the octo's suckers to pull some new hair right out of your scalp and into a nice new head of hair!

48: Stain Remover
Got an ugly stain on the carpet that brand-name cleaners and powerful acids just aren't getting?  Use OctoCan!  Release that little critter onto the affected area, then just sit back and watch the stain disappear before your very eyes!  Also works on lime scale and hard water deposits, so make sure you get plenty of OctoCans to use as stain removers!

 

Posted Dec 4, '11 at 11:36pm

BoredMartian

BoredMartian

276 posts

49. Homework helper

Is your homework too hard and you can't even understand it. OPEN THE OCTOCAN! It does your homework in a blink! Just erase the extra black ink marks.

 

Posted Dec 5, '11 at 3:15am

Darkfire45

Darkfire45

1,678 posts

50. Balloons.

Have a party soon and you forgot to buy a packet of balloons? Use OctoCan! By pumping in helium and tying a string to it, you can give it out to the kids. Best of all, dying the ink inside the octopus will make pretty colours.

 

Posted Dec 5, '11 at 7:46am

amorboy

amorboy

147 posts

51. nuke !!

are you a crazy terrorist ?? dont you have anough money to buy a nuke ?? well that kind of problem wont ever happen again !!! cause with a octocan nuke you can destroy everywhere you want within a second !!

 

Posted Dec 5, '11 at 3:02pm

MagicTree

MagicTree

360 posts

Environment Protection
Oh noes! The d*mn woodcutters are at it again! No worries! just plant a  SeedoCan in the ground and, within minutes, a massive OctoCan tree! Grows 2-126 OctoCans. For a limited time only!

O.O aarmer, how could you? I'll give you another chance 'cause you didn't know. Now, OctoCan can do anything!

 
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