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thoughts of a freak

Posted Jan 20, '12 at 1:10pm

kegaumongo

kegaumongo

1,846 posts

Moderator

I read your thread from time to time. I think everyone's being a bit harsh on your English. I know grammar is essential, but at least you're doing the effort to write in English. My knowledge of English is limited and I also do my best to write understandable sentences.
Back to the topic, you should use a grammar check program. Maybe you could write the story using Microsoft Word, check the grammar and then paste it here. Besides, punctuation and capitalization are really important. Moreover, you should divide the text into several paragraphs, so it would be easier to read.
Anyways, keep writing. The more you write, the better you'll do it :)

 

Posted Jan 27, '12 at 6:32am

xAyjAy

xAyjAy

1,683 posts

"are you hungry or thirsty?" asked lyz shadowling. she wanted to keep him happy in case he could attack them all. "i would like to have some insects, but bloody meat would be ok too. and some blood with fruit juice, please" answered shadowling.

after he finished eating they went to the trainingsroom to test shadowlings skills so they knew what they must to in case he would go berserk. the door to the room opened. it looked more like an arena than a room and the ceiling was missing. everywhere where obstacles like spikes, holes and broken pillars.

"you can train here if you want" said jack to the shadowling. "how about you show us how strong you are? we have many different fitness devices and weights." in the far distant could they see some soldiers training with weights while other soldier made a trainings fight in a smaller smaller area.

 

Posted Feb 1, '12 at 12:54pm

xAyjAy

xAyjAy

1,683 posts

the shadowling lifted one broken pilar from the ground, threw it into the air and followed it on the ground. before the pillar landed he hit it with his left claw. the pillar splitted into thousand little pieces. "i think this show good enough how strong i am" said the shadowling, looking at jack with his free moving eye.

 

Posted Feb 20, '13 at 2:44pm

xAyjAy

xAyjAy

1,683 posts

should i continue the story? anway, untill i decide weither i continue it or not, here, have/read a new poem:

what is true, what is a lie?
is there really a heaven in the sky?
what if heaven is a lie?
we will know the truth
the time we die
and then we will see
if there is nothing
or a heaven and a hell.
well, may i suggest,
that it does not matter
that life is maybe a test
to see who will get
into heaven or hell
if they exist...
i do not want to shatter
your view and belief.
but what if they are not real
and we insist
that they are real.
can we not all coexist
does it matter
if heaven and hell
do or do not exist?
maybe the religions
are all together
a fragment of
a greater trhuth
or they they are neither
true nor a lie...
so, do not cry,
when someone dies.
who knows, maybe we
can meet them and see
our beloved ones again
or we reincarnate.
who knows the truth...

 

Posted Aug 22, '13 at 4:51am

xAyjAy

xAyjAy

1,683 posts

is it ok if i post some links to two of my short stories? they are in german, but i am too lazy to translate them. i wanted to ask before i posted them.

 

Posted Aug 23, '13 at 12:15am

Ferret

Ferret

6,394 posts

Administrator

You can post links to them I'd say, but the the full stories if they are in another language. :)

 

Posted Aug 30, '13 at 2:45am

xAyjAy

xAyjAy

1,683 posts

yes, they are in another language. i would like to post the two links because  i want to continue these short stories, sometimes even at the same time. both are not finished so i can not post one story after the other one. that is the reason why i asked before i just posted the links.

 

Posted Sep 14, '13 at 4:58pm

xAyjAy

xAyjAy

1,683 posts

so, here are the links to my two german short stories:

Gewinnen ist nicht alles

^ this story is about the card game Yu-Gi-Oh!

v and this story is about a summoner who lost his memory.

Der Vyrwar - Reise der Erinnerung *Version 2.0*

 

Posted Oct 22, '13 at 10:58am

xAyjAy

xAyjAy

1,683 posts

here is another link to a short story about mlp (some friends are helping me writting the first chapter). it´s a story about four young colts who are exploring an ancient temple in the everfree forest. i can´t give more information away without revealing to much (spoilers!). enjoy:

Twisted Fate

 

Posted Dec 10, '13 at 2:51am

metalplastic

metalplastic

114 posts

I imagine something like a National Treasure type of adventure.

 
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