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Science Jokes

Posted Aug 1, '12 at 11:10pm

Darkroot

Darkroot

2,879 posts

@1zth If only, the neutrino got bad measurements to the knee.

It is not a bug but a feature.

 

Posted Aug 25, '12 at 9:19am

Mosi91

Mosi91

70 posts

Just found this sensational one:

Several scientists were all posed the following question: "What is 2 * 2 ?"

The engineer whips out his slide rule (so it's old) and shuffles it back and forth, and finally announces "3.99".

The physicist consults his technical references, sets up the problem on his computer, and announces "it lies between 3.98 and 4.02".

The mathematician cogitates for a while, then announces: "I don't know what the answer is, but I can tell you, an answer exists!".

Philosopher smiles: "But what do you mean by 2 * 2 ?"

Logician replies: "Please define 2 * 2 more precisely."

The sociologist: "I don't know, but is was nice talking about it".

Behavioral Ecologist: "A polygamous mating system".

Medical Student: "4"
All others looking astonished: "How did you know ??"
Medical Student: "I memorized it."

 

Posted Aug 30, '12 at 9:37am

Mycal101

Mycal101

312 posts

A student recognizes Einstein in a train and asks: Excuse me, professor, but does New York stop by this train?

 

Posted Oct 6, '12 at 4:48am

Mosi91

Mosi91

70 posts

What is Pi?

Mathematician: The number Pi is a mathematical constant that is the ratio of a circle's circumference to its diameter.

Physicist: Pi equals 3,1415927 plus/minus 0,00000005.

Engineer: Pi is approximately 3.

 

Posted Oct 6, '12 at 11:54am

TheMostManlyMan

TheMostManlyMan

4,744 posts

Johnny was a chemist's son but Johnny but Johnny is no more, what Johnny thought was H2O was H2SO4.

 

Posted Oct 6, '12 at 5:26pm

Skulltivator

Skulltivator

647 posts

Endothermic reactions? I learned about those before they were cool.

 

Posted Oct 6, '12 at 10:51pm

kellynmcfinch

kellynmcfinch

135 posts

jokes eh?

 

Posted Oct 7, '12 at 5:49pm

Skulltivator

Skulltivator

647 posts

jokes eh?


No. What gave you that idea?
 

Posted Oct 7, '12 at 5:56pm

mdv96

mdv96

1,021 posts

What's the chemical formula for iron oxide?

I don't know, my chemistry is a little rusty!

 

Posted Oct 7, '12 at 8:04pm

skydragon720

skydragon720

348 posts

One day after sleeping badly, an anatomist went to his frog laboratory and removed from a cage one frog with white spots on its back. He placed it on a table and drew a line just in front of the frog. "Jump frog, jump!" he shouted. The little critter jumped two feet forward. In his lab book, the anatomist scribbled, "Frog with four legs jumps two feet."

Then, he surgically removed one leg of the frog and repeated the experiment. "Jump, jump!" To which, the frog leaped forward 1.5 feet. He wrote down, "Frog with three legs jumps 1.5 feet."

Next, he removed a second leg. "Jump frog, jump!" The frog managed to jump a foot. He scribbled in his lab book, "Frog with two legs jumps one foot."

Not stopping there, the anatomist removed yet another leg. "Jump, jump!" The poor frog somehow managed to move 0.5 feet forward. The scientist wrote, "Frog with one leg jumps 0.5 feet."

Finally, he eliminated the last leg. "Jump, jump!" he shouted, encouraging forward progress for the frog. But despite all its efforts, the frog could not budge. "Jump frog, jump!" he cried again. It was no use; the frog would not response. The anatomist thought for a while and then wrote in his lab book, "Frog with no legs goes deaf."


What's the chemical formula for iron oxide?
I don't know, my chemistry is a little rusty!


SNORT!SNORT!

 
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