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Henrick's Revenge

Posted May 17, '12 at 6:32pm

emochick324

emochick324

108 posts

-~Chapter I~-

I am Shadow-Eyes, Leader of the Shadow-Callers Clan. We are based of three living creatures. The Human,The wolf, and the dragon. We fend for our territories by marking,
fighting, and killing anything that steps foot in it. Anything else will be eaten.Unless its food,we dont need it. Besides, the clan of thirty,can beat the god Henrick.
Henrick is an evil god, red eyes and coal black hair. His eyes decive you into death,and to consicunses.....one of my brothers died because of this. Now people say my purple-black hair and emrald and black eyes mean something, maybe it doesnt, but I will find out.

 

Posted May 18, '12 at 2:28pm

ellock

ellock

285 posts

The chapter could stand to be longer. That is more of a entry to the book, sort of like a background. Other then that, I think it has good potential, just make sure you work on developing your characters.

 
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