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nichodemus
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nichodemus
14,981 posts
Grand Duke

A word that causes untold regret in millions people, mass panic amongst in-laws, and years of sad sad domestic training and taming. Marriage isn't as sacred a concept (Has it been though? I'm sure that anguished husbands and nagging wives have always existed) as what people claim in the ''good old days''. Marriage is increasingly a temporal and brief affair, all puns aside. Divorce is on the rise, with single parent households an ubiquitous sight.

So what do you feel about marriage, and how it has changed over time? Is marriage merely a static and unbearably traditional custom that has to be at all costs between a man and a woman? Or is a marriage more aptly an expression of love at it's heart, and thus doesn't matter when genders are concerned? Is marriage good? Bad? Necessary?

  • 35 Replies
nichodemus
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nichodemus
14,981 posts
Grand Duke

I'm just not sure if I want that. When you are married then you feel OK, but when you break up you feel like your head would explode from anger. And even worse is when you have a child. He also suffers from his parents breaking up. Maybe I would find someone that loves me as much as I love her. If I would find someone like that then I've got the biggest luck ever. So you can't really know what will happen in the future.


That's not a problem with marriage, but more a problem of coping with relationships.
thebluerabbit
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thebluerabbit
5,346 posts
Farmer

I'm just not sure if I want that. When you are married then you feel OK, but when you break up you feel like your head would explode from anger. And even worse is when you have a child. He also suffers from his parents breaking up. Maybe I would find someone that loves me as much as I love her. If I would find someone like that then I've got the biggest luck ever. So you can't really know what will happen in the future.


that can happen in any relationship. im pretty sure you will feel very lonely if youl just push love away. besides, its not as tragic as you think. handle it in a good way and the child will not suffer at all. from your personality im guessing you will (if) choose a lady who will have a good approach towards children. sandess is always around the corner.

you will adopt a child... and then what? you wont keep him forever. he will leave home too one day. and what if he will feel bad or guilty that he will leave you alone? that might hurt the child as well and prevent him from following his own path. there is no way to avoid sadness in life so trying to shrink the amount of it by running away from hapiness isnt such a great way to live.

you might get in a fight with the child you will adpot. is that a good enough reason to not adopt one?
Salvidian
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Salvidian
4,170 posts
Farmer

All it is is a legal commitment.


Am I the only one who is against this? Marriage is a Christianity ritual where you are bonded with your opposite sex partner. After death, in Christianity, it is believed that your loved one will always be alongside you.

Not to mention that it is also a bonding ritual in almost every major religion in the world.

Don't be so shallow.
MageGrayWolf
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MageGrayWolf
9,470 posts
Farmer

Am I the only one who is against this? Marriage is a Christianity ritual where you are bonded with your opposite sex partner. After death, in Christianity, it is believed that your loved one will always be alongside you.


Marriage existed before Christianity and even existed in places well before Christianity reached those areas. While it is true that it was and remains a bonding ritual. In the areas where Christianity first took over the ritual was a private affair between a couple. Something the church recognized and hijacked claiming this private ritual meant nothing without them (and by extension God).
Salvidian
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Salvidian
4,170 posts
Farmer

Marriage existed before Christianity and even existed in places well before Christianity reached those areas. While it is true that it was and remains a bonding ritual. In the areas where Christianity first took over the ritual was a private affair between a couple. Something the church recognized and hijacked claiming this private ritual meant nothing without them (and by extension God).


Absolutely. I was merely using Christianity as an example.
Ernie15
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Ernie15
13,351 posts
Bard

Not to mention that it is also a bonding ritual in almost every major religion in the world.


Plenty of nonreligious people get married. Some people these days get married for legal reasons (i.e. green card marriages) rather than because they want to "bond" for all of eternity.

You're entitled to believe whatever you want, but in an ideal nonreligious government, marriage is only viewed as a legal partnership.
melon0111
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melon0111
211 posts
Nomad

Plenty of nonreligious people get married. Some people these days get married for legal reasons (i.e. green card marriages) rather than because they want to "bond" for all of eternity.

I agree and that's why divorces are rising. people are rushing into marriage without any purpose other than money and immigration or just stupid people. But divorce was much more severe a long time ago. in biblical times (exodus i believe) "unfaithful" spouses would get stoned to death.
thepunisher93
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thepunisher93
1,825 posts
Nomad

me and my girl have choosen to not marry because it will only cost alot of money and we both see it as unnessecery. it will only give us trouble if we want to split for some reason in the futher.

on the counter side tho is marriage not only some formal BS. but has it a few advantentes according to the law about marriad and living together or just living together.
those reasons could be a reason for us to marry on paper (we did consider it) but all the party around it and formal BS isn't ment for us and we don't want to.
(almost the same reason why we don't have kids)

because of such mind set you ppl are having a dengerously low birth rate.
nichodemus
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nichodemus
14,981 posts
Grand Duke

Sorry to spoil all your Christian dreams, but atheists have the lowest divorce rates in America.

cesar3333
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cesar3333
4 posts
Nomad

Marriage sounds pretty hard thing for me.I don't think i'd be able to live with someone that long

Xzeno
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Xzeno
2,301 posts
Nomad

Sorry to spoil all your Christian dreams, but atheists have the lowest divorce rates in America.
WOAH ABOUT.COM! THAT'S THE MOST RELIABLE SOURCE ON THE INTERNET! AND IT'S IN THE ATHEISM SUBSECTION, MEANING IT WAS WRITTEN BY PEOPLE INTERESTED IN ATHEISM, WHICH MAKES IT MORE, NOT LESS, LIKELY TO PORTRAY THE INFORMATION IMPARTIALLY!

If some of our more thickheadedly partisan debaters didn't get it, what I'm saying is that about.com is unreliable in general, and that being in the atheism subsection makes it even less reliable, because interest groups have an interest in portraying themselves in a positive light while portraying their opposition in a negative light.

Sorry to spoil all your atheist dreams, but atheists are just as petty and irrational as theists.

As for the actual topic, I'll write an essay on marriage after I finish an essay on gender relations for another thread.
nichodemus
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nichodemus
14,981 posts
Grand Duke

WOAH ABOUT.COM! THAT'S THE MOST RELIABLE SOURCE ON THE INTERNET! AND IT'S IN THE ATHEISM SUBSECTION, MEANING IT WAS WRITTEN BY PEOPLE INTERESTED IN ATHEISM, WHICH MAKES IT MORE, NOT LESS, LIKELY TO PORTRAY THE INFORMATION IMPARTIALLY!

If some of our more thickheadedly partisan debaters didn't get it, what I'm saying is that about.com is unreliable in general, and that being in the atheism subsection makes it even less reliable, because interest groups have an interest in portraying themselves in a positive light while portraying their opposition in a negative light.

Sorry to spoil all your atheist dreams, but atheists are just as petty and irrational as theists.


Research came from the Barna Group, and evangelical Christian Sect, which would have been interested in actually portraying how atheist are more likely to divorce.

So, read before dissing again. What the more thickheaded people don't get is where the article is based on.
thebluerabbit
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thebluerabbit
5,346 posts
Farmer

If some of our more thickheadedly partisan debaters didn't get it, what I'm saying is that about.com is unreliable in general, and that being in the atheism subsection makes it even less reliable, because interest groups have an interest in portraying themselves in a positive light while portraying their opposition in a negative light.


... you do realise that the world pretty much devides into theists and atheists. who WOULD make such a statement accept for atheists/theists? and when it comes to science and knowledge i will go with what atheists tell me.
Ernie15
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Ernie15
13,351 posts
Bard

you do realise that the world pretty much devides into theists and atheists. who WOULD make such a statement accept for atheists/theists?


You basically just said everyone is an atheist or a theist. Who else would be left to make said statement if you've categorized and ruled out everyone already?

I'm not really interested in the rest of the thread now that it's getting into a religious debate. I'm just confused about this one particular thing you said.
thebluerabbit
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thebluerabbit
5,346 posts
Farmer

You basically just said everyone is an atheist or a theist. Who else would be left to make said statement if you've categorized and ruled out everyone already?


what??? its obvious the world devides into theists and atheists. can you think of anything else? thats exactly my point. he said that since atheists made that statement its "unfair". the only other group of people that would make a statement like that CAN ONLY be theists so his reason for saying this statement isnt valid is pretty pointless.
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