Right. There is nothing (or nearly nothing) subtle about the poetry form of the limerick. It's crude, it's lewd (not on this forum, but take my word for it, it's very lewd), and it's full of stuff that makes you say "duuuuude..."
...see what I'm trying to demonstrate here is that the art of spitting out a limerick is actually quite difficult. I go on and on and on about the importance of being able to balance rhyme with sentence structure and coherence and in this form, where the rhyme scheme pretty much makes the structure, this is of instrumental importance. Success in this regard was mixed, and so the placement depended nearly solely on both your ability to do this as well as thematic consistency. Keep practicing! It is good for your language skill.
Grand Winner: Zootsuit_Riot
Poetry is very subtle;
When it clicks, it's like popping a bubble.
Those who don't get it,
May choose to forget it.
They say it's not worth the trouble.
I picked the first one as it had an acceptable rhythm and packs a greater punch as simile was more appropriate than metaphor in this case. See how it flows and it centers around one idea, without using any extraneous ideas? Extra points here for the subject matter- this is truly a step above.
Congratulations, Zootsuit, you have won a merit! Just message me on my profile and I will make it so.
Second Place: mvpguy22There was a lass called Ms. Pocket,
She loved to light big rockets,
With a BAM KA-BOOM,
And a lot of fumes,
Her eyes flew out of their sockets.
This is a classic limerick, and I'll have you know it was a close contest between this and first place. I liked this one because it has everything a slapstick limerick should have, from the exposition to the sound effect and the somewhat gross ending. In these respects, it's almost perfect!
Third Place: LynothSo close! Superb setup and everything...but that last line is dreadfully difficult to sort out.
There once was a dancing man
When he'd dance he'd often land
On his large behind
Which seemed to mind
So in foam he covered its span
"So he covered its span in foam" would have made a better punchline but would ruin the rhyme. What to do, then? ...I can't think of anything but if you can, please tell us!
And now for...well instead of the usual honorable mentions, I'm going to, for this round, show you something called the
Hall of Oddities!
Hall of Random PunchlinesCholokid: "He had a sweaty armpit."
Thanks, we really wanted to know...that...Adrecka_33: "Stupidly you stare/Like a little mare/Tell i spray you with mace"
sniff...that makes ninja pony sad.
Jediboy277: "and then exploded with a sigh!"
I didn't know that was even possible!fst6: "His ninja feet make a clop clop"
Yeah, I gotta admit. I'm really cool and stuff but probably not cool enough for that to make a punchline...unlike the time where Mr Burns shuts down TV and starts up his own comedy show where even his appearance on set raises a laugh. "Honey, I'm home!" *laugh* "...already?" *laugh*...Hall of Almost GreatsManUtd4life096: I think I mentioned earlier that your limerick could have been totally awesome if changed but the change would require the limerick to be too inappropriate for AG...I will hint at what I mean:
Ever since John was a baby,
His family branded him crazy,
His mates thought him wussy,
They then saw...(you fill out the rest),
And realized he was a lady!
And remember. I didn't say that, no sir I did not!
Shayneii: The idea was awesome, but if you had just changed one line (and a couple of details) it would be epic win-
There once was a man named Joe,
With his stomach, he had a bad row.
Like the cough of a moose,
He let one loose,
And flattened his house with the blow!
And of course, the entries vying for
Dishonorable Mention, because silly me, I've encouraged people to become competitive on this front. What have I done...
Kingryan aka bogan:
There once was a man,
who lived in a dingy can.
He had few mates,
And Victoria was his state,
And so he was a bogan!
Did you know there's a TV show on SBS called
Bogan Pride? The horror!
And the unusually cruel offering from Pazx, aka noob:
Strop is a ninja, so bad on AG,
He lets in much spam, that we all can see,
He FAILS, and dies,
with no single try,
And I'll get banned for this, you'll see.
Gee, which do I pick? Do I pick the one that reads worse or the one that is more full of fail? To be honest none of these really had much zing in them :P So how about this? I'll give Kingryan the DM, and ban Pazx from AG for a day?
Nah, just kidding. This week the dishonorable mention goes to Pazx because he was trying
way too hard to get it...and that's made of fail :P Sorry Kingryan, that's what you get for being a bogan!
Pazx, your forfeit is for every post you make for the next week, you must add a signature at the bottom that says this:
---
Strop says I fail
AND SO IT ENDS!
