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starting at 10:00 AM Pacific time. We apologize for the inconvenience.
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First, I will post the overall rules, and then I will post the specifics about this week.
Original rules, as stated by Ubertuna:
It must fit the week's theme.
It must be submitted by the deadline.
It cannot have inappropriate language in it.
It cannot be stolen (if you plagiarize, we will find you).
I thought of "I've got a theory" from Buffy...
That is a good song.
My very opening line, about understandability, reminded me of Dane Cook's the Atheist Sneeze joke.
"He was so snarky with his *bleep*ing attitude. Yeah, snarky. It's a word."
Your flirty fun,
Mesmerizing me. Your
beautiful body, spending
time together. But,
it's not your body.
It's the way you are.
It's not infatuation,
You're burned inside my heart,
Tattooed to my soul.
What would I do, if I
lost you? My heart would hurt,
Hard, frigid, forgotten you would
never be.
In the end, I think about you,
And it's not your...
Bedazzling body, not your...
Snazzy smile, not your...
Idle eyes, staring into mine.
It's just,
you.
I know it's not very good, spent about 2 and a half minutes on it :P
You are the sun that shines a rainbow into my stormy cloud,
I see your smile beaming out from the dense crowd.
I want to do everything there is to do,
But all I really want is to stay here and be beside you.
I stare at the swirling heavens wishing to be there,
But without you there is no point I wouldn't even dare.
Your smile brightens my day and gives me a future and hope,
When you leave I just want to lay about and mope.
I care, how can I not, when I hold your hand in mine,
Our love, the affection is a powerfulo tool, one that binds.
Like I said I'm not very good at affection so that is all I could come up with
OK ...here is my REAL poem for this weeks theme of "affection".
Moments of Content
Is it just a disposition,
in my mind
Or rather elemental
in its' kind
Does it spring from a sensation
in myself
Or merely a perception
in itself
A result from a reaction
in moments
Or simply subjectiveness
in content
Affection is
Elemental in its disposition
Perceived as a sensation
A subjective reaction
In its moments of content
I just felt like submitting my own poem on the theme because I feel like it, it's based off personal experiences, and also perhaps to spark some new ideas.
I watched your steps with cautious thrall:
I don't want you to slip and fall.
I stayed with you into the night
To make sure that your math was right.
It's funny, but I'm not ashamed,
I know you would have done the same.
Recall the stormy day which brewed
To leave me in an awful mood?
Some beast I was, but still you stayed
Though you were obviously afraid?
It took a walk out on the street
(Which I obliged quite grudgingly)
To return me into selfless sense:
A broken leg from puddles condensed.
Why do I dwell on times that passed?
That level of friendship's been surpassed.
Condolences were my only reaction,
But now you've taught me to take some action;
You taught me to wait, to understand,
And still we walk forth, hand in hand.
Forgot to mention, but it is August 16 now, so entries are closed. Judging will probably be submitted tomorrow.
Judging time!
But first off, a word on the theme. I must say that some of you wrote about the state of love in general, which is fine, but that theme has already been done.
If any of you have read Wuthering Heights, you would know that love can be quite a selfish thing. Indeed, to like something refers to our own feelings and desires for another person or thing. It takes an extra step or commitment to turn it into the level of love, where one actually cares for someone else aside from their own selfish feelings of wanting to be with someone. Another example: Think of Lolita, if you kiddos (or grown-ups) have happened to read that. It's a perfect example of love without affection, which we call a variety of terms: lust and infatuation.
Thankfully, most of you were on the right track with your poems, and I was very glad to read each one. First up, the runner-up!
Runner-up: Best Turn-around Conclusion--Shayneii
Your flirty fun,
Mesmerizing me. Your
beautiful body, spending
time together. But,
it's not your body.
It's the way you are.
It's not infatuation,
You're burned inside my heart,
Tattooed to my soul.
What would I do, if I
lost you? My heart would hurt,
Hard, frigid, forgotten you would
never be.
In the end, I think about you,
And it's not your...
Bedazzling body, not your...
Snazzy smile, not your...
Idle eyes, staring into mine.
It's just,
you.
I'll be honest, from the beginning it didn't seem too promising. I was a bit afraid that it had veered off into a misinterpretation of the theme. However, as it went on, it slowly unfolded into the real subject of the poem, finally breaking it out with a simple, three word statement: "It's just you." Strange as it may seem, that won me over. I don't know why; it just did.
And now, the winner of this week's poetry contest:
Winner: Moments of Content--Wistress
Moments of Content
Is it just a disposition,
in my mind
Or rather elemental
in its' kind
Does it spring from a sensation
in myself
Or merely a perception
in itself
A result from a reaction
in moments
Or simply subjectiveness
in content
Affection is
Elemental in its disposition
Perceived as a sensation
A subjective reaction
In its moments of content
Wow. Amazing...I think this poem really shows the power of word choice. It's amazing how a single long word can describe so much with its connotations and denotations. Not only that, but there's rhyme! My only criticism is that it seemed a bit aloof for a "warm" topic, but that seems hardly fair. Very good job, Wistress, please contact Carlie or Strop about your merit. You are this week's winner!
Now for the next theme...I'll keep it short. The theme this week is: The Hunter or the Hunted. Will you choose to write on the thrill of the hunt, or will you choose the chilling fear of the hunted to base your poem on? Submissions will be closed on Friday, August 28.
Your affection is my perfection of a terrible day.
When I come home my work is done and I can be with you.
Everyday we play the game we will never be the same.
I can only blame my affection at you.
I can only stay with you when you toss and turn and we have me fun.
Everyday
My
Work is done.
<Holding my award> I'd like to thank Parsat and all of my fans ...OK ..enough of that ...
Really? Me? Wow ...thanks so much, I am just glad you took the poem in it's content and understood the way it was suppose to sound, which was more more like an analysis of affection rather then the feeling of affection.
Once again, thanks Parsat!
Meh. Don't really like it, but hey! I could still win by default lol.
I can't free myself
I'm trapped in your hell
I run and hide
But I know you can see me
My soul, darkened inside
I just want to leave
But I can't walk away
Cuz you're following me
And that's where you will stay
The blood will drip
The breathes will heave
No matter how you choose it
Or what you believe
I'm going to die
As you follow me
But I will not cry
This is history
Its only a game
By: Mav
I hide in my blind
Tracking the man that
Ruined my life
He must pay
Bullets with wings,
My FALCON 12 mil,
My chance to avenge
All these years
I've got him now
Addrenalin courses through
My veins. Its just like
Some World War Two game...
Exitement build. But I
Put it down. It will...
Ruin my shot to
End all the mis'ry
This man I'm 'bout to
Kill, kill my family
Burned my house, and
Left me for dead there
I prepare to squeeze
The trigger. One shot,
One Kill, Then Ping!
A shot rings out loud
But its not mine, for
Just inches infront
Of me, lies a bullet
I've been seen here.
Once adrenaline
coursed through my veins, now
Cold animal fear
Freezes me up tight
Years spent hunting,
Years I've wasted
To be given away
At the last moment
Far across the way,
Though I'll never hear
It, a lone sniper
Answers his radio.
"...Tango Down"
---
A FALCON 12 mm is a Canadian sniper rifle.
Just a funny story, but I was playing an airsoft match, and shot somebody. For whatever reason, instead of 'Tango', I said 'Mango' instead, which earned me the nickname 'Mango' whenever I play airsoft. . . .
Its only a game
By: Mav
I hide in my blind
Tracking the man that
Ruined my life
He must pay
Bullets with wings,
My FALCON 12 mil,
My chance to avenge
All these years
I've got him now
Addrenalin courses through
My veins. Its just like
Some World War Two game...
Exitement build. But I
Put it down. It will...
Ruin my shot to
End all the mis'ry
This man I'm 'bout to
Kill, kill my family
Burned my house, and
Left me for dead there
I prepare to squeeze
The trigger. One shot,
One Kill, Then Ping!
A shot rings out loud
But its not mine, for
Just inches infront
Of me, lies a bullet
I've been seen here.
Once adrenaline
coursed through my veins, now
Cold animal fear
Freezes me up tight
Years spent hunting,
Years I've wasted
To be given away
At the last moment
All is lost. Game Over
No reset or pow'r
No extra lives,
Gone, dead, over
I lie there, filled with
Numbness, awaiting the
Next bullet, sure to
Follow the first one
Far across the way,
Though I'll never hear
It, a lone sniper
Answers his radio.
"...Tango Down"
---
I was copying from note book, and a few stanzas didnt copy over... ???
Thread is locked!