First, I will post the overall rules, and then I will post the specifics about this week.
Original rules, as stated by Ubertuna:
It must fit the week's theme. It must be submitted by the deadline. It cannot have inappropriate language in it. It cannot be stolen (if you plagiarize, we will find you).
Also:
The poem must be created for this contest A user cannot win two weeks in a row (though everyone is welcome to submit every week!) Only one submission per user will be accepted
As we all know, the winner will recieve a merit, and their poem will be featured on the _Poetry_ page.
OK, on to this week's topic...Again, we are having a style instead of a theme. Also, this week we are having TWO WEEKS to do it, instead of the usual one. Why? Because this will be an EPIC poem. Or, rather, a parody of an epic poem. Generally, epic poetry is very long, and tells the serious story of a heroic figure. Well, this week, the epic figure is YOU! Write a long poem (I'll leave the definition of 'long' up to you, but give it a good go) about the heroic story of you! It can be silly, serious, whatever... just have fun with it. You have two weeks, so have a great time!
What one does is up to them. Whether its skipping gym. Sleeping late. Having fun on a date. Jumping rope. Smoking dope. Popping a pill. Having fun while you chill.
I know this poem was a little bad. If it makes you sad then... Do something that was listed above It might give you a feeling resembling love.
Last year was a year that I'll always regret A year that I know I will never forget But hope is not lost, and I shall not yet fear As today I begin the near-perfect new year
Shake the bubbly bottle of sparkling champagne Let your old sins take a ride on the midnight train And remember that, while you dance on the ceiling That everyone else in the world has this feeling
It's now three in the morning, but we are not tired A sense of insomnia we have acquired An old neighbor yells out at the top of his voice "Hey you counfounded kids, shut off that blaring noise!"
Do we listen? Of course not! We're all adults here He is just an old man, what do we have to fear? But we are mistaken; we have misjudged old pops That crazy old man went and called the cops!
Hurry, everyone out! Before you get detained It may be new year, but those cops won't refrain! You gotta get out without making a sound Or those crazy policemen will take run us all down
A new year in jail doesn't sound nice to me On the first day of new year I want to be free So I guess if you find this a new practice here Think again, because this starts off every year!
The streamers lie tangled on the ground, amongst discarded carcasses from which they erupted. Like rusted hulls the bottles lay empty, Crumbled cake on the floor its consuming interrupted.
The fairy lights flicker down from the walls, As non-sequentially their warm glow fade to grey. Having come to the end the stereo is silent, Why is there no rejoicing for New Years Day?
Down the road lays a mangled mess of metal, The bright red paint black from greedy flames. A few stand around and gaze at the wreck, Faces construing a pain absent of names.
Further along sits a man on the kerb, Like blood from the wounds, stream the tears down his face. The guilt like a flood washes over him, Knowing what he has done, having ended their race.
In the hospital a boy lays dying, The blood from his head staunched poorly by the cloth. His mothers tears from outside are heard, As his father contemplates acting upon his wrath. (said 'roth' right?)
Hearing the words which spell out the end, The man leaves his wife to grieve for their loss. He gets in his car and drives to the wreck, As he rests against the wheel, from around his neck glints a cross.
Looking at the man who sits on that kerb, The father is consumed by anger and pain which clouds all. He storms towards him with the intent of hurt, His fist clenched tightly, planned to be used to maul.
But then he stops. As his angered gaze meets one of guilt. And in that moment of sincerity his anger is washed away. Embracing the man who caused his sons blood to be spilt.