ForumsArt, Music, and WritingPeriodic Poetry Contest - Theme: Touch of Truth (Page 390, due Jan. 28)

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DragonMistress
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DragonMistress
1,058 posts
Blacksmith

First, I will post the overall rules, and then I will post the specifics about this week.

Original rules, as stated by Ubertuna:

It must fit the week's theme.
It must be submitted by the deadline.
It cannot have inappropriate language in it.
It cannot be stolen (if you plagiarize, we will find you).


Also:

The poem must be created for this contest
A user cannot win two weeks in a row (though everyone is welcome to submit every week!)
Only one submission per user will be accepted

As we all know, the winner will recieve a merit, and their poem will be featured on the _Poetry_ page.


OK, on to this week's topic...Again, we are having a style instead of a theme. Also, this week we are having TWO WEEKS to do it, instead of the usual one. Why? Because this will be an EPIC poem. Or, rather, a parody of an epic poem. Generally, epic poetry is very long, and tells the serious story of a heroic figure. Well, this week, the epic figure is YOU! Write a long poem (I'll leave the definition of 'long' up to you, but give it a good go) about the heroic story of you! It can be silly, serious, whatever... just have fun with it. You have two weeks, so have a great time!
  • 3,868 Replies
Gantic
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Gantic
11,891 posts
King

You guys need to pick up the pace. It's been almost two weeks since the round closed.

AatosLiukkonen
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AatosLiukkonen
66 posts
Nomad

You got it Gantic. I'll have the results up in a bit.

killersup10
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killersup10
2,739 posts
Blacksmith

You guys need to pick up the pace. It's been almost two weeks since the round closed.



Yet you allowed the other poetry contest to do the same....



up upon this grave
lie a man named dave
dave forgot to shave
so he craved and craved
for time to shave



his face was smooth and clean
intill he found a majic bean
the bean was thought of as a teen
a teen that really needed to clean
clean the house,'cuz he was mean



So this was the story of dave
the man who forgot to shave
we should all hope for dave
the mean teen who had to clean.....


To random to even......and horribly written......
Max000_Extreme
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Max000_Extreme
113 posts
Peasant

nit
wit
get
rid
of
kit
of
smelly
arm
pit

Max000_Extreme
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Max000_Extreme
113 posts
Peasant

It shines upon our rice
It smells gorgeously nice
I can devour it more than thrice
Till I have my head full of lice
It will be forever mine
And I can hear it twine
From a million miles
From the kitchen
It is the magnificent chicken

Max000_Extreme
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Max000_Extreme
113 posts
Peasant

Sorry guys for writing so much because I actually love this

nichodemus
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nichodemus
14,990 posts
Grand Duke

The round is already over guys.

killersup10
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killersup10
2,739 posts
Blacksmith

The round is already over guys.


*sticks tounge out*Would have thought that a contest that was desparate for writers just a few weeks ago would love to have a extra poem or two....oh well.
skydragon720
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skydragon720
343 posts
Nomad

It shines upon our rice
It smells gorgeously nice
I can devour it more than thrice
Till I have my head full of lice
It will be forever mine
And I can hear it twine
From a million miles
From the kitchen
It is the magnificent chicken


Very interesting.

Maverick4
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Maverick4
6,800 posts
Peasant

What part of "the contest has been over for three weeks" do you not understand?

Skeleton_Pilot
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Skeleton_Pilot
1,361 posts
Blacksmith

People are clearly anxious for a new round... since this round has been running for nearly an entire month, what harm could it do to initiate a new theme and go from there?

JereN
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JereN
189 posts
Peasant

sooo...when do we get a new round....have been way over a year since I last participated and would like to write something here again ....

killersup10
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killersup10
2,739 posts
Blacksmith

What part of "the contest has been over for three weeks" do you not understand?


The whole "three weeks" part.
Parsat
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Parsat
2,180 posts
Blacksmith

Hi there, because the judging has taken so long, I've decided to take matters into my own hands. I've been a former judge here and there, and although I'm no longer as active as before I still lurk around. I've noticed that nothing has been going on, and so I've decided that perhaps it would be best for the sake of the contest for me to put the mantle back on. If wolf would like to post his judging at last, then his decision can supersede mine.

Wood: Nichodemus


The Art of Love

Caressing her sculpted curves
Laughter tinkling with silvery mirth,
As she coyly and softy murmurs,
Sweet nothings in hushed whispers.

Dimmed the subtle romantic lights,
Sun's orange glow welcomes our Night,
And the curtains came running home,
Our loft bedecked with silk and chrome.

Seductively stroked your cool neck,
Quickly without decorum or tact,
Flung your thin drenched dress away,
Let the connoisseur have his way.

Kissing your sensual lips,
Not a protest, splendid dear,
As I tilted back and took a sip,
Of that heavenly cold beer!


The poet combines a deliberate quaint style with one heck of a setup to bring us the art of love, brought to you by Heineken. While there are intriguing alliterations and excellent word choices scattered throughout the piece, I feel that the rhythm was rather choppy...in this case a strict metrical scheme over an accentual scheme definitely would have been preferable. In addition, the home/chrome rhyme was definitely too much of a giveaway, compromising the careful setup of the piece. Still, an admirable piece.

Silver: Maverick4

Hey there,
You seem a little lonely.
Why don't we walk for awhile,
And take strides to forget the past?

But how foolish of me.
For that would require an effort
On your part,
And you have none to spare.


A poem need not elegance of word nor elaborate schemes to be a poem. Anyone who has undergone a hard breakup will instantly relate to this poem. The last stanza is, in my humble opinion, brilliant in its deadpan bitterness and startling conclusive quality. The set-up that this poem creates in its terseness is very well done. Had the poet not changed his submission, I believe that this poem could and should have taken the prize. Alas, break-ups and fate can be quite cruel...

Gold: TopRank_

Juliet is Dead

paradise was hard fought
then burned to a mound

heaven sank to hell
candles in the ground
they found

an angel with a voice
the way of peace she taught

perfect light
perfect shadow
perfect sound

as dawn subsides to day
perfection flew away

everything has demons
devils in that way
to betray

but some angel
will be found

perfect light
perfect shadow
perfect sound

but in that short time
she was the light itself

light without flaw
but not without it
inside herself

light without shadow
is a song without a sound

perfect light
perfect shadow
perfect sound

perfection flew away
as fringe subsides to fray

as the poison touched her lips
perfect light, perfect kiss

no more

nothing is perfect


In the past, I thought that Romeo and Juliet was a pretty stupid play. How could it be that a couple meets, courts, marries, consummates, and dies in 3-4 hours? But after falling in love and having my own heart broken, I think I realized how deeply Shakespeare understood the power of the star-crossed lover, the search for perfection that ultimately defeats itself only after a taste of that perfection, and ironically enough, the stupidity of young love. I think your poem, understood as a response to Romeo and Juliet, reflects these qualities very nicely. To me, each repetition of &quoterfect" represents a candle on the ground each...you place and place and then you run out and they all burn away into oblivion. There are still places to undergo further revision--I feel that the angel/demon theme is vague and could be drawn out--but the effort I see here is genuine.

So unless wolf objects or the general outcry is sufficient, TopRank_ takes this contest. The theme, which will run until October 8, shall be Full Moon, in honor of the harvest moon and the Chinese/Japanese/Korean/Vietnamese Mid-Autumn Festival. I encourage you all to read some ancient Chinese poetry on the moon; it's quite fascinating and will help you become a better poet. Thank you all, ladies and gentlemen, and have a good night. I cannot say whether I will be around to judge again, but one thing is sure: I will be watching, and I will be waiting.
nichodemus
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nichodemus
14,990 posts
Grand Duke

I wish I could carry them lanterns as I did when I was a child. Oh well, real life calls, festivals stalls. Thank you Parsat!

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