Starlight
Spread through time and space,
Little white dots-
On an MRI, wink at us-
Menancingly.
What does it mean,
Is as much as we ask, casting our eyes to the heavens,
For we can only know what they-
Might bring.
The rays of light pierce limbs,
Pinning them, setting them aflame,
Blinding eyes,
Piece by piece the world-
Falls to pieces.
I could write any number of poems on this topic, myself, because my current work/training affords me much thought...any number of things that may affect our brain will impinge upon our consciousness, even our awareness. It says a lot for what consciousness is, but it also leaves a lot unanswered.
The above poem is actually about one of the mystery pathologies: Multiple Sclerosis. Look it up sometime, and maybe the poem will make sense.
Anyway, here I am to do the judging. As you all well know, this is an extremely difficult topic to write upon, and the range of entries (and their diminished number) reflected this. There were a number of gutsy efforts, and I hope that I will acknowledge them accordingly. My issue here is, because I've asked for you to express the unexpressable, just how do I judge that which cannot be expressed?
I'll just give it a shot, darn it! I note Parsat was absent from this round, but seeing as Parsat won the last round his poem would have had to been featured separately.
Grand Prize: Zootsuit_riotI DoubtFive senses rule my being.
Am I to trust those, which guide me?
An adage tells me, "I am."
Am I to trust the words of another?
That which cannot be governed by human instinct
Falls into place
There were a few poems that valiantly attempted to explore the quandrary of defining consciousness. I believe this one was the most pithy, even if I'm not sure I agree with its assertions.
Congratulations, zootsuit, you've won yourself this week's merit!
Second Place: squidlidinkTHROUGH THE WORLDI sat.
The breeze of my outer world
surrounded me,
filled my lungs
I sat on the water's edge
on a rock
where fish
had died of
this world's air
I sat
not looking
not hearing
not feeling
tasting or smelling
or even thinking
But I sat
looking
hearing feeling
tasting smelling
and thinking
not through my own body
but
through the world
A rather unorthodox approach, I highly rated this because of its Zen perspective. In a way one might say this poem circumvents the problem of consciousness by examining our relation to our world in a different manner.
Third Place: ganticNever a Perfect ThousandOne door opens
Echoes a nine hundred ninety-nine doors
The room without windows
One door closes
Echoes a thousand and one doors
The room without windows
One door opens
Echoes a thousand and one doors
The room without windows
One door closes
One sound
One window
Wow...this...nearly went over my head. At least I will never perfectly know what goes on in gantic's mind, not least by definition. But this one seems to me to appeal to neurological gated models of behavior, and encapsulates the recursive nature of the process and yet the emergent phenomenon that appears to result, but how we cannot know!
Thus it is a very elegant metaphor, though my sense of aesthetics are not quite as sure if the expression is as elegant to match. I guess that would be why I've judged these entries in the order I have.
So those are the placegetters, but there are more fine (and downright strange) efforts to be commended!
The Honorable Mentions and Hall of OdditiesTilting At Windmills: Adrecka_33, you've put in a strong effort to define consciousness, but ask yourself...would it ever be enough?
The Singalong channel: Zophia's poem was similar but it had a very song-like character to its meter *plays a creepy version of
Teddy Bear Picnic in the background* And it's alllll in your head!
The Matrix Has You: aaroniscool obviously understands the basis of the Matrix, enough said really =)
Surprisingly Good For a Drunkard: tempo013. When I read "gay", I must say I didn't have very high hopes, but I have to admit, the poem ended up being a rather poignant one. The simplicity works strongly in its favor.
The Things That Go Bump in the Night[i]: I would place two separate nominations here- Estel for writing something intense and desperate, Cenere for writing something introspective and despairing. Or should I say, eeeeeeeemo :P
[i]Haiku Corner: Let us compare lynoth's effort, a slightly overwritten (for a haiku) but neat 5-7-5, with, say, kingryan's effort, a rather funny joke that nonetheless commits syllabic travesty by chopping "conscious" into THREE syllables! My god man, what have you done!?
Poems that I'm not sure what to say about: Uhh, _kolak_ and jediboy277...that which is "
oetry" is a wide umbrella indeed. But I must ask. Would you call those poems? They go quite far and beyond what I say "whut" to :P
Remember, relevance is of importance here! There is much to be explored, so think carefully!
Since I already nominated a topic, carry on guys!
