Can I hear a yay!
You know why? I forgot today is early out. I love Mondays, because they're early out days. Tuesdays, not so much. But this means that judging will be received a good three hours earlier than planned.
Yay!
Bronze Medal Goes To...
Green fills the sky
in the warm days of summer,
but it changes
with the coming of autumn
To a brilliant collage
of red, yellow, n' orange.
short on time, but brilliant
As winter approaches
the sky becomes bare;
just sticks jetting up to the sky.
but as springs comes around
A new green appears
bringing life to the once dead sky.
As the cycle repeats
again and again,
our lives continue on normal.
But just looking up just once
on the green lined sky
It can make a bit of a difference
By Waluigi
I liked the word choice, especially the use of adjectives, and the message in it. But the rhythm seemed rather rough, and I personally think this poem might be improved if you added rhyme to the lines, or perhaps an onomatopoeia here or there would likely add character. But that's just my opinion, and it's a good poem already.
Congratulations on winning the Bronze Medal(6th place), Waluigi.
Iron Medal Goes To...
The Savanna
Lions rest,
Zeebras feed,
Animals are free,
and they are filled with glee.
Untill hunters come,
they kill these animals,
they eat their flesh,
those evil men.
After this,
settlers come,
they build high towers,
they build concrete jungles.
Where are the animals?
Those original natives?
They're lost, dead,
hunted, bewared.
This is what's happening,
as savannas disappear,
where are our natural comrades?
Those beautiful things.
By OperationNilo
I liked the message about the hunters coming and the natural habitat and creatures disappearing, as it feels like a story is being told within the poem(as is with many of these poems). And although you started to repeat yourself a few times, I did enjoy reading it, and that's really what counts.
Congratulations on winning the Iron Medal(5th place), OperationNilo.
Silver Medal Goes To...
The environment
When nature sees us
I think I'll go out
And buy a prius
I'll go hang out
With my good friend Michael
And together
We'll recycle
Forget boring fish
Ditch icthyology
My favorite subject
Is ecology
The environment's great
The best I have seen
It is my favorite thing
To just go green
And it sure is a shame
That in 2004
We did not have the option
To vote for Al Gore
By TerryLasVegas
I enjoyed this one a lot. The rhyming was excellent, but what really made it stand out was the humor, the last few lines in particular. Although a few lines become too short or too long to fit into the rhythm, it's still an excellent poem and a great representative of the theme.
Congratulations on winning the Silver Medal(4th place), TerryLasVegas.
Gold Medal Goes To...
White blankets shroud the bare brown trees
I wince to harsh winds sting
in dreams I feel the Summer breeze
and see the leaves of Spring.
The gold of Autumn far behind
as shadows creep on rime
and ice-filled clouds that turn one blind
to blue skies lost in time.
wait to watch the birds return
and smile at waves on shore
when Winter yields to Summers burn
like every one before.
By Devos12
This one is extremely good; the rhyming and rhythm in particular earned it this spot. Also, the word choice and use of adjectives gave it a little extra spring and character. An excellent poem. Not really much to improve on here except for the grammar(which you should not listen to me about, as I am a notorious Grammar Nazi.)
Congratulations on winning the Gold Medal(3rd place), Devos12.
Platinum Medal Goes To...
Nuclear Devastation
Firing the hearts of all dead men,
Seeks an atom of the end.
It will split, its neutron collide,
In volatile gamma override.
Chain reaction screams of fire,
Rising a mushroom clouded spire.
The fallout is as we say,
"The mind will have a final day."
When we settle, we all compile,
A sighted sound of lethal vile.
With the destruction, a free light appears,
Then intensity it burns and sears.
The woods around, all combust,
As if it was destructive lust.
The trees are shrubs and grass around,
All scream and see and flung around.
In the meadows, uranium settles,
Burning in boiling glowing kettles.
It causes our genes to shift and change,
For a mutagen it carries mange.
Over time, our blood decays,
Leukemia treatment fills our days.
Cancer and blindness are all consuming,
And devastation leaves us fuming.
We sit back and watch the days,
The mutated blood bath of our friendly bays.
We fish our mutants,
And all we see are heavy pollutants.
By TSL3_needed
This is a poem I really enjoyed, despite the darker tones(honestly, if you expect me to have qualms with dark influences and whatnot in poems, then you are clearly unaware that it was I who created and sustained the Morbid Literature thread for quite some time), the rhythm and rhyming was outstanding, as well as the word choice, and this is easily deserving of first place(if another competitor had not arisen). And honestly, it tells a solemn truth, for this was the fate of many affected by nuclear fallout such as in the Chernobyl project or the bombing of Hiroshima. In conclusion, an amazing poem with an even better message. Honestly, even I can't find anything to criticize about this poem, and that's saying something!
Congratulations on winning the Platinum Medal(2nd place), TSL3_needed.
Diamond Medal Goes To...
I Miss You In This Old House
I wonder how I'm supposed to feel,
When you're gone from my life,
Lock the house, it's a prison seal,
This place reeks of burning strife.
No there's nothing to say for salvation,
Tap tap this house grows old,
Torn wallpaper and wilted carnations,
And when I left you took my soul.
Cars roam the dusty highway,
Clouds flit by, it's a silent picture,
You call everyday and I said it's okay,
But all I think about is my departure.
Empty dark windows mirror my eyes,
But the time is ticking slow,
As I gaze at the orange gold skies,
I see the fireflies' ambient glow.
The shift is almost over this time,
The plane ticket's already in the drawer,
Tattered rag wiping up the grime,
Cold drops from the broken shower.
It's a hollow house I stay in,
The wooden floorboards creak sadly,
Brown curtains flapping in the wind,
I still need you so badly.
Two years and they'll let me go,
Now the finals grains in my hourglass fall,
As I observed the falling snow,
Cardboard boxes are lined in the hall.
And I'll be back before long love,
I feel a stinging cold numbness,
Sitting by this lonely warm hearth,
You know love is my biggest weakness.
The dawn of the day is breaking,
Finally because I miss you honey,
Keys in hand, my door is locking,
Light floods in the house, it's sunny.
By Nichodemus
This, ladies and gentlemen, is an exemplary poem, and it will be the one taking home the merit this week. Not only is just about everything flawless, from the grammar to the rhythm to the choice of words to the rhyming, it takes a different stance on the environment, instead describing one's own home. And it is also, I believe, the only poem to apply onomatopoeia(the "tap tap", which really adds character to it. The message, well, while it's solemn, I think it's about a breakup, and one of them just can't handle it. Again, I have nothing to criticize here(which, as I have already said, is a miracle in itself).
Congratulations on winning the Diamond Medal(1st place), Nichodemus. Contact Carlie for your merit.
Congratulations to all those who won a medal, and for those of you who didn't, well, it was very hard to choose, so keep trying. I would also like to thank all of you for participating.
New Theme Is: Repetitiveness
That's right, the new theme is repetitiveness. Which could have a wide variety of responses, from deja vu(someone thinking something's happened before), to the drab life most of us have, waking up every day to the same routine of going to work or school, or how the same things happen every year, how it could change, someone's take on it, etc. etc. Let your imagination go. But you'd better get cracking on it, because the
New Deadline Is: Monday, November 16
Good luck on the poem. See ya later!
