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Shark7996
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Shark7996
373 posts
Nomad

This is a dumb thing that I wrote, and I think it's blissfully stupid!

If you're ever surfing the internet and come upon a link for "www.7days.com", DON'T CLICK IT! Here's why.
When you get to the page, you will see a bunch of smiling bunnies and happy dancing trees. Then, everything will start to frown and die. Your computer will instantly go back to where you were, and the link will be gone. Then, the phone will ring. You will pick it up, and all you will hear is heavy breathing. Then..."Let me tell you about a great new product..." It's a TELEMARKETER! For the next six hours, every other time the phone rings, it will be someone trying to sell you USELESS JUNK! Then, after six hours of this unbearable torture, you will get a call from the White House. The president will want you to go to Africa to get back the world supply of cheeseballs from an evil disco crime lord. However, your plane will crash in the jungle and you will be stranded there. Thus ends day one.
On day two, you will make your way to the crime lord's fortress, surviving on pomegranates that you find in your pocket. You will come across a yellow brick road, a stalker who thinks he's Santa, and a rabbit who says he's late for a date or something like that.
On day three, you will make it to the evil fortress, and will have to break in using only your socks, a toothbrush, and a chihuahua you found in your pocket. Fortunately, you have a portable DVD player and the second season of MacGuyver. You break into the fortress, but will keep getting caught and having to restart the level. Finally, you will find a secret area with an invincibility cheat and use it to easily defeat the crime lord in a dance-off.
On day four, you will return home to find that your best friend has been frozen and that your father has a really cool robot suit and a lightsaber. You will never get along with your father ever again, but will put your friend in the living room, where he will be a good conversation starter at parties.
On day five, you celebrate national cape day. Unfortunately, your cape gets caught on a jet fighter as it takes off. You barely survive the fighter's next three dogfights, and, as it lands, you realize that national cape day is tomorrow, and decide to just not celebrate it this year.
On day six, you will start a band, become famous, then break up the band when you find out that your drummer has secretly been meeting with the bass player to get them both to have solos. You will lose all your money and will sleep on the streets that night.
On day seven, you decide to join a group of hobos. Unfortunately, you never get used to the taste of baked beans, which makes it hard for you to fit in with the other hobos. You will die that night next to your best friend in the whole world, a baseball named Rawling. Bet you wish you never went on that website now!

Before you ask, sorry, I'm never writing any sequels for this.

  • 5 Replies
kingryan
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kingryan
4,196 posts
Farmer

Ohk.....Lets check that website....Its not really possible....Invisibility Cheats and stuff like that....

Quite Entertaining though!

Well Done

KingRyan

masta_cheef
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masta_cheef
670 posts
Nomad

Hey is it okay if I make my own ridiculous 7 days story? anyway here's the story

Day One: If you go to a website called "Newgrounds" you will immediately be so overwhelmed by all the swearing and violence and inappropriateness that your computer will explode along with your house.

Day Two: You are now on the street living in a trolley, until your arch nemesis arrives and takes your trolley "Stop thief!" you yell.
"It's Ikea's property now dumb a*s!" So now you have no trolley but then you are overjoyed to see something! A Lolcat!

Day Three: "I can has cheezburger?" asks Lolcat. "No! I don't has a cheezburger to giev you!" You reply. You find a cardboard box with an Xbox controller. "I think I will name you Xboxy!" You say to the controller. "No! Mai nayme is Lolcat!" says Lolcat. "Not you!"

Day Four: You, Lolcat and Xboxy set out to get a job. Lolcat buys a website domain and does extremely well with I can Has Cheezburger . Com, Xboxy gets a job as a controller for the Xbox 360 but you get nothing.

Day Five: Having no money or food you decide to try and steal money. You can see a dropped wallet which looks very conveniently located. "Wow! That wallet is very conveniently located!" you shout in joy. You pick it up and find 50 dollars. "Cool! I found 50 dollars. I could buy loads of stuff with this." But unfortunately the money and wallet disappear into thin air.

Day Six: You die.

Day Seven: Up in heaven, you are told that what happened to you was a complete misunderstanding. And you are given another chance at life!

REWIND REWIND REWIND

Day One: Instead of typing in the URL you switch off the computer and go play Xbox 360 instead. "I iz not gona 4getz u." You swear you heard Lolcat but it's not possible.

THE END

shermzx
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shermzx
564 posts
Nomad

7days .com?

it's some web hosting site no bunnies=(

Zophia
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Zophia
9,435 posts
Scribe

That was - funny in an interesting sort of way. Nice use of random.

firetail_madness
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firetail_madness
20,593 posts
Blacksmith

Wow, I liked both stories!

Could be interesting.

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