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A giant number 5.....

I wish all skinny people were fatter than fat people.

Granted but it makes the fat people skinny which means they get fat and so on until the everythings dead from mass obbesity.

I wish that i knew the meaning of life.

You know but it scares you so badly you go into a coma and your family cant afford to support a human vegetable so they pull the plug

I wish for a pet monkey

The monkey has every disease ever discovered and undiscovered.

I wish for a mod to reply to this forum.

he does, and perma bans you.

i wish i had a magic vending mechine that couldn't fall over, i can put anything in, and anything can come out.

In goes the girlfriend, out comes a boyfriend.

I wish that the vending machine would fall over.

it falls over you

i wish for another gun

You get the gun but you hold it the wrong way and shoot yourself.

I wish for nothing.

you're nothing,bummer,get a life and stop posting this wish,it's been here for like a 10-15 times already

i wish tarzan was real

Wish granted, but Tarzan swings in through your kitchen window and kidnaps your mum.

Woops!

I wish playaholic wouldn't call me "nothing". ;(

granted,he calls you when you're wearing nothing

i wish for a large hammer

A hammer falls from the sky, hits you on the head and knocks you into a coma.

Oops, again.

I wish for a nice lunch today. ;P

you get a nice lunch,but bad trouble with the wish maker...

i wish to invent a motorized roller blade