Stepping out the door of his apartment, he hears a crunch. Looking underneath his shoe was what was always there every freakin morning. Fruit Loops, red fruit loops. He knew who it was. It was Janieâs kid. Xavier? Xylon? Xylophone? Hell he didnât know. He didnât understand the point of naming your kid something crazy. Even though he lost a bet with Mac that he would name his first born son Billy Mays. But he was safe on that deal. He was fired and He might as well take a vow of celibacy. He saw the little twerp running around the halls, dropping red Fruit loops everywhere. He walked up to Janieâs door and banged on it with his fist. âJANIE! GET YOUR DAMN KID OUT OF THE HALLWAYS. IâM REALLY TIRED OF STEPPING ON FUCKING FRUIT LOOPS.â She opened the door. âIs he causing any problem to you?â âYeah, turning the bottom of my shoes to a different color they were beforehand and also leaving rotting fruit loops EVERYWHERE. Yeah thatâs kind of a problem.â âDo you even know his name?â âNope. Donât want to. Donât care.â âFine. Xavier! Get in the apartment sweetie!â The little boy practically sprints inside the studio apartment. She slams the door in Steveâs face. âI can honestly say I hate children.â He grumbles continuing his trek to the down stair corridor. Somehow, without any Drama at all he goes outside. He looks for any traffic tickets or a boot on his â95 Blazer. Surprisingly, there was no kind of paper stuck to his car. Unfortunately, some punk keyed his car over the night. He grinned to himself. âHa. Teenage punks ever hear of touch up paint!?â He unlocked the door, reached over to the glove box, opened it and pulled out his red touch up paint, which was almost empty. âWell, that sucks.â He only got half the scratch filled in. âCrap.â He knew living in the city was going to suck. But he also knew it was better than living in a town that if anyone drove through was reminded of Deliverance. âNow this is a story of how my life got turned upside d-â âHello?â âDUDE, Steve where are you!? Itâs a quarter till four!â It was pretty much his best friend. âIâm on this mystical thing called a road!â Putting on a fake foreign accent. âIt is very great for the great of America!â âWhatever dude, Johan is going to playback the fight card from last night at four. You better hurry!â With his normal voice âWhoâs on the Card?â âUmm... Brock Lesnar v Frank Mir, Rashad Evans v Shogun Rua, and Randy Couture v Shane Carwin.â âSounds good, well Iâm here.â âI know I see that piece of crap you call a car.â He hung up. âAlrighty then.â He got out of the car, locked it, and walked inside. He sat down next to Gordon. âYo.â âDude, were becoming a damn tourist trap.â âNah, gives us someone to Harass.â âYep. While you harass, I get game. Youâre like a wingman that doesnât mean to be one.â âWhatever. Iâm trying to lay off the Billy Mays bet. Speaking of which, I got fired.â Johan laughed in his Ukrainian accent. âHa-ha, you damn bum. Do not worry though. You always know I need a bar back.â âNah Johan. Iâm into more sophisticated work.â âLike what? Working on Silly website? There are a million sites! You think your single one would stand above the rest! Absolutely not!â âOkay Johan. Thanks for the encouragement.â âI say things. I say these things, because I am caring for my friend.â âJack and Coke.â âYou got it!â âJust that easy.â A few moments of silence past when Gordon asks, âAnything going on with that babe Janie?â âThe lady with the little twerp that drops fruit loops like flies?â âYeah.â âDude, sheâs dating the apartment manager.â âYeah, so?â âWould you really want to kiss anything touched by a guy who doesnât know how to work a shower?â âOh. Probably not.â A huge âOHâ just passed through the bar when Brock Lesnar 1 hit Koâed Frank Mir. Everyone was up and reenacting the punch. Suddenly a car alarm went off. Looking out the window, Steveâs Blazer was gone. He went running out of the door with a bottle in hand. âHEY! THATâS MY CAR! HEY! HEY! ASSHOLE!â He threw the bottle at the car. He sat on the pavement and nearly cried âNow whatâ¦â He saw the broken glass on the ground. âWonderful, not only did they steal it, they destroyed it.â Gordon was laughing. Johan was shaking his head. Gordon told Johan âIâm going to go egg him on.â âDo not do this. That is a terrible thing to happen to our friend Steve.â âYeah, and Iâm going to go make fun of him for it.â He went outside and sat next to Steve âSoo, guess your gonna need a ride home? You know since your car just got Jacked and stuff.â Steve grumbled âLeave me alone.â âCome on Steve wouldnât you rather ride in the Honda?â âScrew you Gordon.â âWhat.â He stood up and shouted âSCREW YOU GORDON.â Gordon laughed âAnd what are you gonna do? Hit m-â In between his sentence Steve did the same punch as Brock Lesnar did and knocked Gordon out cold, He took his wallet and told Johan. âHey lets put a couple of rounds to everyone. ON GORDON!â Johan stood at the bar with his jaw wide open. âHoly shit. Have you ever considered MMA?â âNah, Iâm into lazy work.â âAlrighty then.â The drinks poured. --------------------- Steve part deuce. I don't really know where I'm going with Steve. I kind of want to get the mother and step-father involved more to become more influential chracters but otherwise, I don't know. So if you have any Ideas (Must be REALISTIC, Sorry no giant monsters.) please feel free to tell me. I may incorporate it into the next issue.
Okay something happened with the " <-- Don't really know so here a reedit./ Just because I care. Ignore the first post and look at this one. ========================================= "Stepping out the door of his apartment, he hears a crunch. Looking underneath his shoe was what was always there every freakin morning. Fruit Loops, red fruit loops. He knew who it was. It was Janie's kid. Xavier? Xylon? Xylophone? Hell he didn't know. He didn't understand the point of naming your kid something crazy. Even though he lost a bet with Mac that he would name his first born son Billy Mays. But he was safe on that deal. He was fired and He might as well take a vow of celibacy. He saw the little twerp running around the halls, dropping red Fruit loops everywhere. He walked up to Janie's door and banged on it with his fist. "JANIE! GET YOUR **** KID OUT OF THE HALLWAYS. I'M REALLY TIRED OF STEPPING ON ****ING FRUIT LOOPS." She opened the door. "Is he causing any problem to you?" "Yeah, turning the bottom of my shoes to a different color they were beforehand and also leaving rotting fruit loops EVERYWHERE. Yeah that's kind of a problem." "Do you even know his name?" "Nope. Don't want to. Don't care." "Fine. Xavier! Get in the apartment sweetie!" The little boy practically sprints inside the studio apartment. She slams the door in Steve's face. "I can honestly say I hate children." He grumbles continuing his trek to the down stair corridor. Somehow, without any Drama at all he goes outside. He looks for any traffic tickets or a boot on his �95 Blazer. Surprisingly, there was no kind of paper stuck to his car. Unfortunately, some punk keyed his car over the night. He grinned to himself. "Ha. Teenage punks ever hear of touch up paint!?" He unlocked the door, reached over to the glove box, opened it and pulled out his red touch up paint, which was almost empty. "Well, that sucks." He only got half the scratch filled in. "Crap." He knew living in the city was going to suck. But he also knew it was better than living in a town that if anyone drove through was reminded of Deliverance. "Now this is a story of how my life got turned upside d-" "Hello?" "DUDE, Steve where are you!? It's a quarter till four!" It was Gordon who pretty much his best friend. "I'm on this mystical thing called a road!" Putting on a fake foreign accent. "It is very great for the great of America!" "Whatever dude, Johan is going to playback the fight card from last night at four. You better hurry!" With his normal voice "Who's on the Card?" "Umm... Brock Lesnar v Frank Mir, Rashad Evans v Shogun Rua, and Randy Couture v Shane Carwin." "Sounds good, well I'm here." "I know I see that piece of crap you call a car." He hung up. "Alrighty then." He got out of the car, locked it, and walked inside. He sat down next to Gordon. "Yo." "Dude, were becoming a **** tourist trap." "Nah, gives us someone to Harass." "Yep. While you harass, I get game. You're like a wingman that doesn't mean to be one." "Whatever. I'm trying to lay off the Billy Mays bet. Speaking of which, I got fired." Johan laughed in his Ukrainian accent. "Ha-ha, you **** bum. Do not worry though. You always know I need a bar back." "Nah Johan. I'm into more sophisticated work." "Like what? Working on silly website? There are a million sites! You think your single one would stand above the rest! Absolutely not!" "Okay Johan. Thanks for the encouragement." "I say things. I say these things, because I am caring for my friend." "Jack and Coke." "You got it!" "Just that easy." A few moments of silence past when Gordon asks, "Anything going on with that babe Janie?" "The chick with the little twerp that drops fruit loops like flies?" "Yeah." "Dude, she's dating the apartment manager." "Yeah, so?" "Would you really want to kiss anything touched by a guy who doesn't know how to work a shower?" "Oh. Probably not." A huge "OH" just passed through the bar when Brock Lesnar 1 hit Ko'ed Frank Mir. Everyone was up and reenacting the punch. Suddenly a car alarm went off. Looking out the window, Steve's Blazer was gone. He went running out of the door with a bottle in hand. "HEY! THAT'S MY CAR! HEY! HEY! *******!" He threw the bottle at the car. He sat on the pavement and nearly cried "Now what?" He saw the broken glass on the ground. "Wonderful, not only did they steal it, they destroyed it." Gordon was laughing. Johan was shaking his head. Gordon told Johan "I'm going to go egg him on." "Do not do this. That is a terrible thing to happen to our friend Steve." "Yeah, and I'm going to go make fun of him for it." He went outside and sat next to Steve "Soo, guess your gonna need a ride home? You know since your car just got Jacked and stuff." Steve grumbled "Leave me alone." "Come on Steve wouldn't you rather ride in the Honda?" "Screw you Gordon." "What?" He stood up and shouted "SCREW YOU GORDON." Gordon laughed "And what are you gonna do? Hit m-" In between his sentence Steve did the same punch as Brock Lesnar did and knocked Gordon out cold, He took his wallet and told Johan. "Hey lets put a couple of rounds to everyone. ON GORDON!" Johan stood at the bar with his jaw wide open. "Holy ****. Have you ever considered MMA?" "Nah, I'm into lazy work." "Alrighty then." The drinks poured. --------------------------- Steve part deuce. I don't really know where I'm going with Steve. I kind of want to get the mother and step-father involved more to become more influential chracters but otherwise, I don't know. So if you have any Ideas (Must be REALISTIC, Sorry no giant monsters.) please feel free to tell me. I may incorporate it into the next issue.
