Me and my dad were coming home from Target and we saw a Geico car enter the highway. The funny thing is that the driver had his blinker on for about 3 miles and was drinking a smoothie while driving with his head back. That is NOT safe driving. Bad advertising.
Alright, at lunch me and some friends walked over to McDonalds and saw a hearse in the parking lot. Didn't stop us from eating there, but made us laugh.
My brother and I were walking home from a local store down our street when we seen some skaters from school trying to grind down a church steps railing. Ofcourse one ended up with a crouch full of bar. Look painful but was hilarious.
Yesterday i accidentally shot myself in the foot with a bbgun...twice, the second time i got scared cause my friend jumped up in front of me and i pulled the trigger...then the first time i was reckless and tryed to scratch my foot with it and well BANG!!!
Oh man, I have the greatest story ever. This happened just the other night.
So anyways, it's nearing the end of summer and me and some friends decided to go out an get totally wasted.I mean, eat your girlfriend, fuck your dog, pet your pizza drunk. So anyways we have this huge bonfire going (one of my friends lives on an acreage) and we break out the drink. Shots, highballs, beer bongs, you name it, we did it. So anyways we were getting pretty rambunctious and one of my friends decides it would he funny to punch one of the girls there in the nose, just to see if he can break it. It was hilarious, but I don't think she understood that it was a joke. So anyways she starts screaming and flipping the f*ck out squirting blood everywhere. So I yell, ki9ck her in the teeth, maybe she'll shut her w*ore mouth, so he does just that. So now she's rolling around on the ground just making noises and we start asking the question everyone asks themselves when they're drunk enough to f*ck fuck a tiger in the a*s and think you're doing it a favour, "Do you think that you can make bacon out of humans?". Short answer, yes. Long answer, YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!
