It was the year 2008, it was Winter at that moment and every family in a small town were all having Christmas. One boy named Jayson was not exactly satisfied with his family's Christmas Traditions, Every year Jayson would only get $20 as his present, nothing more and nothing less. He wasn't very satisfied because Christmas was the only day he would receive money and he would soon waste it all.
Just across the road a boy the same age as Jayson named Johnathan was having Christmas with his family as well. But he was a very satisfied boy, every year he would receive many presents that Jayson would otherwise not receive at all.
One day Jayson went to the town's Graveyard, this is where he would usually hangout because nobody comes here at night and he had the place to himself. Suddenly as he was walking through the Graveyard he heard a loud snarling noise, a chill went down his spine and he screamed, "Who's there?! Show yourself!" the snarling noise became louder and a Wolf with red and black fur and glowing red eyes approached him.
Jayson backed away due to fear of the sight of this beast. He ran away screaming in terror but the wolf easily caught up and soon tore Jayson apart bit by bit. As morning arose the Townspeople hear a scream from across town. A young girl had found the torn remains of Jayson's body, they quickly went to the site and buried Jayson's remains.
After the day of the burial they once heard another scream, another victim's life had been taken and now it was the life of the boy named Johnathan who lived just across the street from Jayson. Johnathan too was buried. After wards more screams have been heard each day and more bodies were soon buried...
Finally, After 9 days of bloodshed and non-stop slaughter. The word "Fangthane" was burned into the ground where the children laid dead, Now every night they would hear the howling of Fangthane and once a person went to the graveyard at night. They wouldn't come out alive...
I think you could expand upon this. Add more of a story. Like, for example, the village(or whatever) to hunt down the wolf. Don't just end it with the feeling that the wolf is still alive!
the second paragraph seems useless... unless you are going to expand on this, which we hope you will, then... and I reccomend revision I can't do my own but that doesn't mean I can't find errors!
Hm... Reminds me of a superstition about the Black Hounds that protect graveyards... But it doesn't kill it, it only tells you, you are going to die soon. Good story non the less, and I think he ended it just fine, I am fairly sure, he was implying the wolf was of supernatural origin, so killing it is not an easy feat.
