Three people are in a plane. A child, an old man, and (former president) George W. Bush. The plane starts to crash, and there are only two parachutes. George Bush says "well I'm the smartest man in the world, so I'll take one!" and jumps out the plane with a parachute on. The old man says to the boy "you can take the other parachute, you have your entire life ahead of you." The boy says...
"It's okay mister, we can both have a parachute. The smartest man in the world just took my backpack."
[more of a playground-style political joke, but it's still an old favorite]
Three people are in a plane. A child, an old man, and (former president) George W. Bush. The plane starts to crash, and there are only two parachutes. George Bush says "well I'm the smartest man in the world, so I'll take one!" and jumps out the plane with a parachute on. The old man says to the boy "you can take the other parachute, you have your entire life ahead of you." The boy says...
"It's okay mister, we can both have a parachute. The smartest man in the world just took my backpack."
George Bush and Saddam Hussien find a Genie together. The each get one wish. Saddam wishes that his country was surrounded by a wall high enough that no one can get in to attack. Then George smiles and wishes that it were filled with water.
A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?"
Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me capitalism. Your Mom, she's the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the Government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you the people. The nanny, we'll consider her the Working Class. And your baby brother, we'll call him the Future. Now, think about that and see if that makes sense,"
So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad had said.
Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper. So the little boy goes to his parents' room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed. The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now."
The father says, "Good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about."
The little boy replies, "Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being ignored and the Future is in deep shit."
I love the political jokes Bill Hocks made (fuck it I loved ALL of his jokes lol):
"I loved when Bush came out and said, "We are losing the war against drugs." You know what that implies? There's a war being fought, and the people on drugs are winning it."
"Here you go America, you are free to do as your government tells you"
