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that's in like secret agent movies. And since i'm making another post i might as well put up a joke

Marriage is like a game of poker. You start out with a pair, and end up with a full house!

Pixie arn't those jimmy carr? :-D He is well funny.

~EGG JOKES~
How does an egg drive?
'They egg-celerate and break'

How does an egg leave somewhere?
'They use the egg-sit'

Why do eggs go to school?
'To get egg-ucated'

What do you call an egg on safari?
'An egg-splorer'

------
Why were E.T's eyes so wide?
Because he saw his phone bill..

Why were E.T's eyes so wide?
Because he saw his phone bill.

The discharge from my **** >_>

Pixie arn't those jimmy carr? :-D He is well funny.

ohhhh that's not nice to say! But funny lol

yeah me too. I like classics upgraded. Lol that didn't make too much sense did it?

Ok here goes some woman:whycant hellen keller drive? cuz shes a woman. did you see the picture of hellen kellers father? neither has she. why dont women drive? cuz theres no highway between the kitchen and the laundry room. why did the woman cross the road? idk but what the hell is she doing out of the kitchen?

I didn't get that nater(0_o) sorry but it doesnt make that much sense. Does anyone get it?

A blonde had just totaled her car in a horrific accident. Miraculously, she managed to pry herself from the wreckage without a scratch and was applying fresh lipstick when the state trooper arrived.
"My God!" the trooper gasped. "Your car looks like an accordion that was stomped on by an elephant. Are you OK ma'am?"
"Yes, officer, I'm just fine" the blonde chirped.
"Well, how in the world did this happen?" the officer asked as he surveyed the wrecked car.
"Officer, it was the strangest thing!" the blonde began. I was driving along this road when from out of nowhere this TREE pops up in front of me. So I swerved to the right, and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was ANOTHER tree! I served to the right and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was ...."
"Uh, ma'am", the officer said, cutting her off, "There isn't a tree on this road for 30 miles. That was your air freshener swinging back and forth."

hi everyone thankz for commenting and for now the winner is xverb with
[quote] 5 guys walked into a bar the sixth one ducked

My dirty joke is better:

Pig in the mud.

A blonde had just totaled her car in a horrific accident. Miraculously, she managed to pry herself from the wreckage without a scratch and was applying fresh lipstick when the state trooper arrived.
"My God!" the trooper gasped. "Your car looks like an accordion that was stomped on by an elephant. Are you OK ma'am?"
"Yes, officer, I'm just fine" the blonde chirped.
"Well, how in the world did this happen?" the officer asked as he surveyed the wrecked car.
"Officer, it was the strangest thing!" the blonde began. I was driving along this road when from out of nowhere this TREE pops up in front of me. So I swerved to the right, and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was ANOTHER tree! I served to the right and there was another tree! I swerved to the left and there was ...."
"Uh, ma'am", the officer said, cutting her off, "There isn't a tree on this road for 30 miles. That was your air freshener swinging back and forth."