Forums → The Tavern → Anger: A common affliction

I'm not sure about all of you folks, but I tend to notice that I am quite quick to anger. Even when I consider myself to have very good restraint, that's all inherent in my self-esteem issues in that I don't believe I could hurt the nerdy guy with glasses and no muscle. Otherwise, I'm a complete sack of anger and angst who would, in any other circumstances, kill that person who said that I didn't look amazing in this fedora and tuxedo (and I do look good in it, you jerk).

A few weeks ago, I was driven to such anger that I punched a wall. It was the corner of a drywall and I didn't realize there'd be a painful stud right below the surface. Needless to say, I broke my knuckle for a good 3 weeks, and my pinky knuckle will always be displaced for the rest of my life. It was during the time that I lazily threw my crippled hand into a sling that I realized I have no outlet for my anger.

Most would say "Well you're okay at writing, use that ANGRAR to make a good piece!" and I would usually say that's a good idea. Until the first time I tried writing something whilst angry. I wrote a dastardly little piece called "Mother<censored> Apocalypse", about how god said "lol i hat u guyz" and then decided to have a different apocalypse for each nation.

Needless to say, it sucked. I'm ashamed to still have it on my computer, actually- there, deleted. Not only was the work that I pumped out freaking terrible, but it was also rushed and not even completed. Why? Becuase when I'm angry I don't have the mental ability to do much else besides destroy (be it things around me or myself). I don't have the required focus to even throw my fists at a punching bag.

Not to mention, the only thing that tends to put me out of a rage is substantial pain to myself. So even when punching the punching bag until there's nothing left to punch, until I'm bleeding in the fists I won't be satisfied.

"Then do other artsy things! Throw paint at a wall and call it a mural!"

First off, I hate doing that, because I never really see abstract art as anything more than colors meant to set a mood. Secondly, I still don't get the satisfaction from throwing my body around like a lunatic. Hell, when I get angry enough I tend to just let myself go into a self-induced tremor where I'd consciously shake my body around and throw my body at anything in the general vicinity in some kind of incredibly child-like tantrum.

"Uh... kill people?"
You know why this one isn't a good idea.

Too long; Didn't read
How do you cope with anger? Becuase I tend to have a whole lot of problems coping with my own emotions. Painting a smile on my face and making jokes doesn't work since it usually instigates more anger, and punching things isn't satisfying unless I'm causing harm to myself. I also don't have enough focus to do artsy things.

brb punching bears