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Feghoots, Lunch Pines, and Long Puns

Posted Dec 24, '12 at 5:27am

nichodemus

nichodemus

11,853 posts

Knight

Nate and Lever is just far far too long.

 

Posted Dec 24, '12 at 9:45pm

Gantic

Gantic

6,771 posts

Moderator

If anyone has an original Feghoot to post this would be the thread for it.

 

Posted Dec 27, '12 at 2:23pm

R2D21999

R2D21999

8,110 posts

Not sure if this is original I found it on a website.

Prof San Holo was busy at his lab. He was experimenting with splicing genetic material from rams into eggs of bees, thereby creating bees with useful traits of the ram. With global warming,  certain species of flowering plants flourish while others perish. The idea was to give the bee the ability to digest leaves and grass to make honey and thereby reduce the need to be reliant on nectar and pollen from flowers.

The first splicing was a disaster. The bee digestive system became dysfunctional.
The second attempt disrupted the honey production with lactose contaminant
The bee grew tiny horns in the third!

He then tried DNA from a sheep and Eureka! Yes indeed. It worked because he 
Made the Fourth Bee with Ewe.

 

Posted Dec 27, '12 at 4:47pm

Gantic

Gantic

6,771 posts

Moderator

If it's not yours, don't post it.

 

Posted Dec 27, '12 at 7:38pm

R2D21999

R2D21999

8,110 posts

Oh it has to be mine, oh sorry.

 

Posted Jan 27, '13 at 2:31pm

Gantic

Gantic

6,771 posts

Moderator

Sheeple

Little do people know, their fates are controlled by sheep. They bear great resemblance to the Fates of Greek mythology, with the only difference being that they are sheep. The sheep spin lifeyarns from the wool of the mother sheep, measure them, and cut them. As with handspun wool (or hoofspun), lifeyarns are lumpy in varying degrees. These are the lumps of life, so to say. It is these lumps that make one life different from another. Small lumps are little moments. Big lumps are momentous changes. Some yarns came with bigger lumps and more lumps, as some lives are fraught with more fret and fray, though not all lumps were bad because one man's trash is another man's treasure.

Like humans, like all creatures, these yarns are not spun to be alone. These lumpy yarns are woven together into tapestries of communities. Where lines crossed, people crossed. Where lines twined, people twined. Where lumps clustered, the community changed, the human spirit rose above in a monumental and sometimes unbelievable historical events. But these clusters of lumps exist in an unstable equilibrium and with time, the conditions may shift and change the position of clusters in such a way that, like a memory or a tear in the fabric, it isn't the initial conditions that shepherds the future (though it is the seed), but the effect of an effect that steers the course of future events. And it propagates from phenomenon to phenomenon. Indeed, people's futures are greatly controlled by the ewe-knitted states of a miracle.

 

Posted Jan 27, '13 at 9:31pm

R2D21999

R2D21999

8,110 posts

Ohhh another one... and it's hard again. *looking so hard*

 

Posted Jan 27, '13 at 10:33pm

Gantic

Gantic

6,771 posts

Moderator

It's always in the last line.

 

Posted Jan 27, '13 at 10:41pm

R2D21999

R2D21999

8,110 posts

Pbbbf I knew that. *looks and sees it* Ohh I know what it is but I don't wanna ruin the fun.

 

Posted Jan 29, '13 at 9:18pm

StormWalker

StormWalker

2,799 posts

*staring at it*
*staring at it*
*staring at it*
Nope, I don't see it.

 
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