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Jokes and funny facts

Posted Mar 4, '13 at 9:19pm

pickpocket

pickpocket

5,883 posts

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To find his gay best friend

knock knock
Who`s there?
the chicken.
---
No offense of corse

 

Posted Mar 4, '13 at 9:19pm

Terry_Logic

Terry_Logic

4,222 posts

Less than 7% of people deliberately run over animals on the road.


So that means nearly 7% of all animals you see dead on the side of the road were run over on purpose.

Seems legit.

-An average of two people die every year from farts.


How....do you....?
 

Posted Mar 5, '13 at 12:19am

pangtongshu

pangtongshu

9,708 posts

A scary one..

-Statistics have shown that approximately 30,000 Americans every year suffer with anesthesia awareness (which is waking up during an operation)

Random sleep facts

-People getting only 6 to 7 hours of sleep every night have a longer life expectancy than those who sleep 8 hours.

-Although people born blind donât see images when they dream, they do have an increased auditory, tactile, and olfactory experience

-Scientists havenât been able to figure out why exactly we need sleep.

-12% of people have black and white dreams. Before color television though, the number was 75%.

-You can only dream about faces you have already seen. If you dream about a face you do not recognize..it is either a face of a person you say for a brief moment..or a collection of different faces you have seen made into one face.

-Scientists have determined that counting sheep is ineffective for putting oneself to sleep. Evidently it is too boring and imagining a calming landscape generally works much better.

-Another effective way of helping oneself fall asleep is to try and keep yourself awake (such as trying to keep your eyes open)

-Not sleeping for 16 hours leads to a decrease in performance equivalent to having a blood alcohol level of .05%

-That moment right before you fall asleep when all of a sudden you jolt wide awake has a name â" itâs called a myoclonic jerk.

-The Challenger space shuttle disaster, the Chernobyl nuclear meltdown, and the 1989 Exxon oil spill were all caused to some extent by sleep deprivation.

-Almost everything we know about sleep was all learned in the last 25 years

 

Posted Mar 5, '13 at 5:00am

MageGrayWolf

MageGrayWolf

9,776 posts

Knight

The amount of calories you burn having sex is equivalent to what you would burn raking leaves for the same amount of time.

 

Posted Mar 6, '13 at 8:46pm

ironblade41

ironblade41

530 posts

MageGrayWolf has OVER 9,000 posts.

Anyway,

Why does Snoop Dogg need an umbrella?

Fo'drizzle!

 

Posted Mar 7, '13 at 11:14am

mikacinikac

mikacinikac

393 posts

The cops must be after you, because it's illegal to look that good.

 

Posted Mar 31, '13 at 5:29am

mikacinikac

mikacinikac

393 posts

Blonde jokes:

She was so blonde that she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.
___________

Q: Why do blondes smile when there's lightning?
A: Because they think they're getting their picture taken!
___________

How do you make a blonde laugh on Sunday?
Tell her a joke on Thursday!
___________

A smart blonde, a stupid blonde and Santa Claus play poker, who wins?
The stupid blonde because the other two don't exist.
___________

Q: How do you sink a submarine full of blondes?
A: Knock on the door.

 
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