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Gantic
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Gantic
11,847 posts
King

Gantic has a thread and will weave a cloth. This is a thread brought to you by Gantic & Co. Bringin' change to a constantly changin' world.

The title of the thread will become apparent later, but to start off:

Three Cowboys

Just to make things clear, there were never three cowboys. Just two. One of them's got the solar-powered laptop, the other's got the rubber ducky, but they're both mavericks, all three of them. It was my idea to throw in the third cowboy, but he's as real as any of the others. The solar-powered laptop and the rubber ducky were my idea, too. So were the two cowboys. To make things clear: There were no cowboys.
In the vast emptiness of the Moobes, a black craft shaped like a horse, christened the Star Straddler, cruised to what was only a small but sparkly blue-and-green marble. The captain had his boots up on the dash as his craft crawled along the moobe that would bring him to the planet that the Moogle Navigator had found. As the craft touched down on the surface, only one thought was on the captain's mind: "The Space Cowboy has landed. In Armor Games."

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kingryan
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kingryan
4,199 posts
Blacksmith

.....Ok....Intertererereresting...very...random...A solar powered laptop and a rubber ducky?

lol...This should be made into a flsah movie...

KingRyan

Zophia
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Zophia
9,464 posts
Bard

That's pretty awesome.
Very interesting way of writing~
Please continue!

Strop
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Strop
10,835 posts
Herald

Hoo boy, Douglas Adams, eat your heart out!

Gantic
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Gantic
11,847 posts
King

Three Cowboys

The Space Cowboy landed the craft in an empty grassy field. Checking the methane fuel meter, he set his craft into graze mode and the metal horse began eating the grass. Although he landed in what he thought was an empty pasture outside of the main city he saw as he descended, he was not alone. A massive man mountain wearing a wide-brimmed hat and fur chaps stood in front of his craft. As he approached, he realized that the man wasn't actually wearing any fur, the man was the fur. Furthermore, he had a nose ring and horns.
"Howdy!" the furry man mountain said.
"You're a talking buffalo man!"
"Bullman, actually. I thought a space cowboy would actually know who Buffalo Man is. And you know, while we're at it with names, how can one be a 'cow'boy. I mean a cow's a you-know and you're a... You aren't...? Never mind."
The Bullman rested his left... um, hand-hoof thing on a rubber ducky around his waist, but the Space Cowboy didn't want say anything about it. He raised his right... hand hoof up to show the splendour of Armor Games, but all the Space Cowboy could see were spammers in the distance being slapped with steaks hot off a barbecue.
"Welcome to Armor Games."

Strop
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Strop
10,835 posts
Herald

This definitely has a bovine flavour to it.

Mmmm. Steak.

kingryan
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kingryan
4,199 posts
Blacksmith

Mmmmmmup....

Ok...then...
I want to eat some beef....

KingRyan

Strop
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Strop
10,835 posts
Herald

And upon really chronic spammers shall I pelt prairie oysters!

slliM
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slliM
1,465 posts
Peasant

How much pure awesomeness was that made of?

Let me check my awesome-meter.

dude that was 100% pure awesomeness!

Very random though.

I like your style of writing very much.

I love AG references in stories...

kingryan
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kingryan
4,199 posts
Blacksmith

And upon really chronic spammers shall I pelt prairie oysters!


Err...ok....

Strop you are becomming more and more Spammy I see...must be part of the bo...ZIP! MOVED TO BOGAN WARS...

Whens the next story installment?\\

kr
Gantic
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Gantic
11,847 posts
King

I've still got the taste of steak (sauce) on my mind.

And upon really chronic spammers shall I pelt prairie oysters!


Those things are awful.

Whens the next story installment?\\\\

I'm trying to update this fairly regularly. It depends on whether I decide on what to write and what to save for a future installment.

This one might actually be much longer.

Three Cowboys

The Bullman introduced the Space Cowboy to the sites and sights of Armor Game City citing the notable persons. A rather large shield-shaped building towered over the meager housing of the citizens. This was the sheriff's office headed by the liaison to the higher powers. The sheriffs, or magistrates as they were referred to whenever they felt the need to sound more important than they truly were, had the power to eject all persons into orbit by means of slingshot or trebuchet; the choice was up to the launchee, except for the most heinous, who were subject to the whim of the magistrate. The duo approached the front doors of the building, but were stopped by two armored guards.
"Halt! None shall pass by order of the Queen Magister," the guard on the left exclaimed.
The other guard rapped him on the head with his halberd. "It's Queen Magistrate! A magister's a dude and not even the same as a magistrate. Didn't you read man pages?"
"Dude. We got female knights and you worry about me calling the Queen Magistrate a dude? And yeah, I read the man pages."
As they argued, the Bullman and the Space Cowboy entered the sheriff's office.
"Here we are," the Bullman said. He turned to the Space Cowboy, noting his expression. "Yeah, it's usually this empty."
"Then who administers the law?"
"That would be the Rainbow Gang. You saw the spammers being slapped with Steaks of True Meat? Yeah, the Rainbow Gang is quite busy. They never passed the magistrates test--they are too uptight you know, down with the book, strict to the rules," the Bullman explained.
"What?"
"The Moobes are libertarian, you know? Free to do... just don't annoy people, especially not the 4... Never mind."
At that moment, they heard the strangest wail. A goose had entered through the front door. A snippet of the argument outside slipped through before the door slammed shut. "And yeah, I know her name is not 'Charlie'."
The goose wailed, "Oh someone help me. The Rainbow Gang took my beau gander at bowgun point. All he was doing was resting on the bough 'gainst the trunk of the sword tree and they cited him for sleeping in public!" She waddled to the Bullman and the Space Cowboy. "Pleae help. My beau gander was taken. He's wearing a blue Union cap and brogans. I always told him those boots would be trouble. His feet were killing him, so he flew up to a tree to rest."
"Yep," the Bullman said. "This is Armor Games."
kingryan
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kingryan
4,199 posts
Blacksmith

I'm sure AG isn't this crazy? Geese?

KingRyan

slliM
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slliM
1,465 posts
Peasant

Lol.

Yup This is ArmorGames.

That's like the awesomest.

Danstanta
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Danstanta
1,714 posts
Jester

OMg! !

This is interesting, you should make a novel! Or even a book! If that's equal!?

Strop
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Strop
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Herald

"I could do with some foie gras."

"Isn't that bad for the geese?" Arthur asked.

"F*** the geese," Ford said.


At least that's how I remember it, hahaha. So there are the moobes, the rainbow gang...the four, the female not named Charlie...the magistrates...

That's crazy dude.
Gantic
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Gantic
11,847 posts
King

This is nothing compared to what could happen.

Armor Games is as crazy as it is. Reading all the stuff that passes through @_@//. It's not as crazy as some of the places I've been, not even a little bit. (Sadly, people here take pride in their sanity.) But at least there's hope. It's always the writers and artists that are a little out there. Musicians are comparably normal.

This is interesting, you should make a novel! Or even a book! If that's equal!?

I already gave up on my NaNo and am not about to start on another such project, not soon anyway. My mind can't seem to take more than small steps in any direction that's structured. I've mostly resolved to compiling snippets from abandoned projects to make anything longer than a ten page essay. It works rather well, so that's what I'll do. Write bits here and there.

I'll add something tomorrow.
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