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Rate the above person's joke and post your own.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
yes that's a completely horrible joke.
- 95 Replies
10/10 Now that's genius.
At a meeting in a Soviet factory, a Communist lecturer tells the workers about their bright future in the USSR.
"See, comrades, after this five-year plan is completed, every family will have a separate apartment. After the next five-year plan is completed, every worker will have a car! And after one more five-year plan is completed, every family will own an airplane!"
From the audience, somebody asks, "What the hell are we supposed to do with an airplane?"
"Don't you see comrades? Let's say, there are shortages in potatoes supplies in your city. No problem! You take your own plane, fly to Moscow and buy some potatoes!"
Great joke 7/10 (All everybody needs is more government programs. Ha!)
How do you make a blond drown? You put a scratch and sniff on the bottom of a pool.
????
But still...
WARNING, BAD STAR TREK JOKE...
Why did the computer cross the road?
To get to Data!
Not funny -.- 4/10
A boy walked to his mom and said: Tell the Santa clos that i dont want a PlayStatin 3 anymore!
Mom: But, why you have whised you a PlayStation 3 for along time now.
Boy: But i found one PLayStation in the bassement
(sorry for bad spellign )
Don't really get it... 4/10
Heres a little Christmas blonde joke!
Two blondes decided that this Christmas they wanted to cut down their own Christmas tree. So they drove two hours into the country and walked deep into the woods to find the perfect Christmas tree. They had planned the trip well, especially considering that they were blond. They were dressed warmly with boots, warm coats and hats. They had a chain saw, hatchet, a bag to protect the tree and rope to drag it back to their car. Every detail was covered.
They searched and searched. They had gone to all this trouble, nothing but the prefect tree would do. They searched for hours through knee deep snow and biting wind. Finally, five hours later with the sun beginning to go down, one blonde says to the other, "I can't take this anymore. I give up! There are hundreds of beautiful trees out here. Let's just pick one whether it's decorated or not!"
( "
6.5/10 Okay, but not the best.
A blond goes to Florida and sees a pair of alligator leather boots that she likes. Asking for the price, she is shocked to find that it is 75 dollars.
"What?! I bet I can get it even cheaper!"
"Sure," replies the storeowner, thinking that she's just kidding around.
After a while, though, he looks out of his store to see the blond diving into the swamp, wrestling an alligator out of the water, and blowing out its brains with a shotgun. She flips it belly-up onto a heap of other alligators, then snarls with disgust.
"Damn, this one isn't wearing any either!"
8/10
A priest, a rabbi, and a protestant minister were all in a row boat 100 yards off shore. The oars to the boat had fallen in the water and the holy men were stuck.
The rabbi says "Well, fellas, I'll see you later." He hops out of the boat and proceeds to walk on water to the shore.
The priest says "Well, I'm off as well. I'll see you later." He hops out of the boat and proceeds to walk on water to the shore.
Amazed, the protestant minister swings his legs out over the side of the boat and eases himself towards the water. The rabbi, watching the minister get ready to jump out, leans over to the priest and says "Do you think we should tell him where the stepping stones are?"
Hahahahaha! Nice! 7.5/10
How do you keep a blonde busy for hours?
Scroll Down. --->
<----- Scroll Up.
( "
umm could use some work 3/10
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesnât seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: âMy friend is dead! What can I do?âThe operator, in a calm, soothing voice, says: âJust take it easy. I can help. First, letâs make sure heâs dead.âThere is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guyâs voice comes back on the line. He says: âOkay, now what?
6/10
A blonde went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman. "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
She hurried home and dyed her hair, then came back and again told the salesman, "I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
"Darn, he recognized me," she thought. She went for a complete disguise this time, haircut and new color, new outfit, big sunglasses, then waited a few days before she again approached the salesman. "I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
Frustrated, she exclaimed, "How do you know I'm a blonde?"
"Because that's a microwave." he replied.
umm i dont know what happened so ill just redo it.
a couple of new jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground.He doesnt seem to be breathing,his eyes are rolled back in his head.The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator:My friend is dead! What can I do?The operator, in a calm, soothing voice, says:Just take it easy. I can help. First,lets make sure he is dead.There is a silence, then a shot is heard.The guys voice comes back on the line:He says okay now what do i do?
tennisman i dont get it....
oh wait i just did is it cause blondes are supposed to be stupid......lol 9.5/10
A blonde went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman. "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
She hurried home and dyed her hair, then came back and again told the salesman, "I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
"Darn, he recognized me," she thought. She went for a complete disguise this time, haircut and new color, new outfit, big sunglasses, then waited a few days before she again approached the salesman. "I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
Frustrated, she exclaimed, "How do you know I'm a blonde?"
"Because that's a microwave." he replied.
tennis why did u reply yours? i did because some stuff appeared that werent supposed to be there.
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