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Written Nothings

Posted Jan 28, '09 at 7:10pm

Gantic

Gantic

6,842 posts

Moderator

A Red Motor

I once had a red motor that didn't work properly. It was marred too, re doormat. (Using it to bridge a gap to a door wasn't a smart idea. A mat would have had a tamer odor.) I then realized its artistic value and considered it for an art demo or something, but the art people told me to do more art. Like they knew anything about door art. Me and Tom swore to dream or rot. Made me think about how I had my arm rooted in modernization, so we made a OMO retard to the engine, but it fell apart. Said Tom: Err? Ado about nothing! That's what it is. We'll never get into an art room, Ed. Moral: A red motor is useless. Then a moderator banned me after figuring out my code.

 

Posted Jan 29, '09 at 11:00pm

Gantic

Gantic

6,842 posts

Moderator

The Raptor Survival Club

I was the only one prepared. I had the vision. The sole surviving geneticist was successful in creating an adult-height theropods, raptors we called them, to eliminate the zombies. Initial trials were promising. Field tests were phenomenal. We celebrated until Ian realized that zombies don't reproduce. Henry, the geneticist, had disappeared in the midst of the party. Maybe he knew the raptors would need a new food supply. Zombie tactics were useless. Shotguns, chainsaws, makeshift cudgels. I was prepared. I had plans for Raptor-proof doors and barricades. Once the fortifications were built, we started building Robots to eliminate the Raptors.

 

Posted Jan 30, '09 at 1:04am

Strop

Strop

10,823 posts

Moderator

Then a moderator banned me after figuring out my code.

I hate you :'

 

Posted Jan 30, '09 at 9:55pm

Gantic

Gantic

6,842 posts

Moderator

My wordplay is too advanced for you. :P Not entirely witty though.

Reaching Out to Touch No One

"That's bull, man," the keeper said. He was right. It was bull. Not even I would believe what I said. "There's no space, cowboy, and you know it." That I did. Strange how it was though. The stranger thing was that I was usually keen on such things. "Are you even listening to me? There's no room for your stallion, man."
I mounted and called out, "Hey, Star! Straddle ready to go?"
"Yeah."
After we rode out a fee paces I said, "Must be bad luck. Bronco busters filled up the place."
"Yeah," she replied.
"Well I wasn't going to eat crow. Man! Did you hear him say man?"
"Yeah," she said.
"I will never admit to anything, let alone lying."
"Yeah. I know."

 

Posted Jan 30, '09 at 11:13pm

Strop

Strop

10,823 posts

Moderator

I could never finish more than half those bloody cryptic crosswords anyway...here's my notes so far:

Ado about nothing- possibly related to Much Ado About Nothing?

OMO is a brand of washing powder.

Red motor makes me think of a much ruder, definitely offensive to several people, I-can't-possibly-explain-myself-here joke.

And that's what throws me off so hard that I can't start.

 

Posted Jan 31, '09 at 3:27am

kingryan

kingryan

4,165 posts

I am completely confused.

And so I ate a chicken pie and walked across the street in a tutu.

 

Posted Jan 31, '09 at 8:59pm

Gantic

Gantic

6,842 posts

Moderator

It's not incredibly hard or that well thought out, not as well though out as my last post. Overthinking is what it is.
It takes me a day to almost complete half of a New York Times crossword and those are the hard ones. It takes three to solve a simpler problem.

I am completely confused.

And so I ate a chicken pie and walked across the street in a tutu.

The answer to a joke! Marvelous joke too. LOL

 

Posted Jan 31, '09 at 11:27pm

Strop

Strop

10,823 posts

Moderator

Oh, so you are getting in on this cross-dressing business, Kingryan! :D

 

Posted Jan 31, '09 at 11:35pm

Destor

Destor

504 posts

"That's bull, man," the keeper said. He was right. It was bull. Not even I would believe what I said. "There's no space, cowboy, and you know it." That I did. Strange how it was though. The stranger thing was that I was usually keen on such things. "Are you even listening to me? There's no room for your stallion, man."
I mounted and called out, "Hey, Star! Straddle ready to go?"
"Yeah."
After we rode out a fee paces I said, "Must be bad luck. Bronco busters filled up the place."
"Yeah," she replied.
"Well I wasn't going to eat crow. Man! Did you hear him say man?"
"Yeah," she said.
"I will never admit to anything, let alone lying."
"Yeah. I know."

If I had read your other writings, I would understand this. But I don't.

I found a few things: the "space cowboy" part, but I don't know what that is.

You used the word Stranger a lot, and I saw you "reaching out and touching no one" story, or at least 1 chapter of it, and I think one of the character was called the Stranger.

I can't figure it out, is this a thread of riddles? I don't know if you are just writing, or if there is something else. If you don't tell me, by ignoring or saying you won't tell me, I will know it is a riddle. So you can't win. Unless you lie, in which case I will just try harder.

 

Posted Feb 1, '09 at 2:14pm

Gantic

Gantic

6,842 posts

Moderator

If you don't tell me, by ignoring or saying you won't tell me, I will know it is a riddle. So you can't win.

Doublespeak gives wonderment to the user and bemusement to the end. Answers would not be so readily apparent if answers were such. Especially when people end thoughts and sentences with conjunctions therefore! You know? Would I assume such? No. Not entirely. But how does anyone? Could whomever would cut off their sentences at but know? Or is it not that because?

If I had read your other writings, I would understand this. But I don't.

Not entirely necessary. Well, maybe. Just need the character names. The second post I made explains everything of this thread somewhat. But to further: Interpretation may not be my entire intent, a report I would assume presents a puzzle of sorts? Riddle? Maybe. Or perhaps I said: Interpretation may not be. My entire interpretation, I would assume, presents a puzzle of sorts.

Confusing though how it is.

Of course, hidden elements of plots and assumption also flow into this, where not everything is needed to necessarily understand. But not everything is something. I can be more confusing than this without talking in circles but indirectly at no one with no meaning and without entering into doublespeak, although it is confusing enough to seem so and might be. Was that even intelligible?

"A Red Motor" and "Reaching Out to Touch No One" are the only "puzzles" here, so far, and not entirely puzzles more than amusing wordplay. Punctuation presents meaning and boxes the mind sometimes, so does spelling. I once looked at a poetry writing exercise that asked to "punctuate this poem". It was ambiguous enough to present different readings from the persons involved.

"Cranberry and Coffee" is a joke. The punchline not entirely obvious, but a joke on readers who get lost in detail. It's like so totally awesome!

"The biggest n00b" was a poke in several directions. I mean like filler words and vowels, like um, are so inflationary that like precipitous is totally incomparable. I mean you can't even say that it isn't. And no one should ever say "so totally awesome" or "so", "totally", and "awesome", you know? Like that isn't bad enough, using like every like few words is like so much worse than like saying "um" in a speech or like presentation. It's like involuntary mental pause (No, this is not like a wordplay on you know what!) but your mouth (or the word center of the brain) just can't stop moving.  I notice I type with filler words (and I'm not sure what the correct word is here) sometimes and have to go back to correct them. Not "like" but the others (i.e. "I mean" and "you know" and "Well").

"The Raptor Survival Club" was a poke, too, in various directions.

Now, Destor, I have answered your question.

 
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