ForumsArt, Music, and WritingA man with a heart, shows no hate

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drago9292
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drago9292
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Jason is a loving, caring man who loves to share his heart with the world. Everyday he shows his compasion by saving a wild animal in the alley next to his house. Except for the animals he only loves one person. His best friend from high school, Carmon Bennedict. He had loved her since the first day he met her but he never managed to show it. Until today, Jason was already on his way to Carmon's house in his new Pickup truck he had bought the week before.

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drago9292
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drago9292
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leave comments if you want more of the series

killersup10
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killersup10
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sounds ok.wish ya would have posted more though.hard to tell how cool it would be by only reading a paragragh

HahiHa
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HahiHa
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Jason is a loving, caring man who loves to share his heart with the world.

Except for the animals he only loves one person.

I think you should formulate one or both of those sentences differently so as to avoid contradictions, or people might get confused about the exact personality of that Jason.
drago9292
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drago9292
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Jason rolls down the window as he drives towards Carmon's house. The fresh smell of barbecued ribs fills Jason's nostrils.
"mmmm Carmon's house is close" said Jason as he took a sharp right onto Carmon's street. Jason sticks his head out the window to see if Carmon is outside. He spots her standing on her front porch eating freshly barbecued ribs.
"Hey Carmon!" yelled Jason as he pulled into Carmon's driveway.
"Hey you" replied Carmon in her angelic voice.

drago9292
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drago9292
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Meanwhile...

drago9292
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drago9292
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In the underground sewers of the city, lurked Captain. Obliteration, A evil villain who only enjoys fighting with kids on the playground. Even though he is 45 he still enjoys acting like a little kid from time to time. Anyway, Captain. Obliteration was working on a device he called the Screemo. The Screemo does what you would think kind of stupid at first. The Screemo, Shreiks in an impossibly high pitched voice, shattering all glass within a 10 mile radius of it and then it launches into the air (about 1000 feet) and it sucks up all the broken glass.Then here comes the weird part, It completely opens from top to bottom (except the big hole which sucks up the glass) and a control panel and a recliner rise out. Then Captain. Obliteration will sit in the recliner and use the controls to launch all the broken glass at innacint civilians, killing them in a matter of seconds.

drago9292
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drago9292
90 posts
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In the underground sewers of the city, lurked Captain. Obliteration, A evil villain who only enjoys fighting with kids on the playground. Even though he is 45 he still enjoys acting like a little kid from time to time. Anyway, Captain. Obliteration was working on a device he called the Screemo. The Screemo does what you would think kind of stupid at first. The Screemo, Shreiks in an impossibly high pitched voice, shattering all glass within a 10 mile radius of it and then it launches into the air (about 1000 feet) and it sucks up all the broken glass.Then here comes the weird part, It completely opens from top to bottom (except the big hole which sucks up the glass) and a control panel and a recliner rise out. Then Captain. Obliteration will sit in the recliner and use the controls to launch all the broken glass at innacint civilians, killing them in a matter of seconds.

drago9292
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drago9292
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:O

drago9292
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drago9292
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sorry guys... My browser glitched, i did not mean to double post...

MetalHeart
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Nice story

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