ForumsThe TavernThe Zombie Survival Club! (basic rules on page 144)

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thoadthetoad
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thoadthetoad
5,642 posts
Peasant

This is a completely serious club, people who make a decent enough plan will be able to comment and review other plans. Here is some zombie info.

run/walk: they walk

scream/groan: they groan

day/night: All da time babey!

what they attack: EVERYTHING THEY HEAR, OR THAT MOVES!

survivors: very very little, like near 100-1000 people on EARTH

guns: This is real time, being your neighboorhood and everything, you have all the resources you have in your house.

cure: there is none.

where to go: so long as you have a plan to get their, go for it.

how much you can carry: AGAIN, THIS IS REAL TIME

family members: theres a high chance they are zombehs too.
able to join: if you didn't read, just make a good plan.

durability: they can take ALOT of damage, worse than playing last stand 2 with just a pistol for the entire game when the zombies have twice as much life.

doors: they can't work a doorhandle for the mostpart of their brain is already rotted
I am still making my plan right now, but I think some of you can do it. Let the zombie surviving begin!

  • 5,049 Replies
Bjiscuit
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Bjiscuit
610 posts
Nomad

Normally I'd take my turn and tell you about all the things in there you said wrong, but I'm going to leave you for the more uh, cruel, members.

But I would like to point out though

Feel like you need to know anything else about me, then just ask, but please refrain from being a douchebag, making accusations & assumptions on subjects that you know nothing about.


Aren't you being a 'douchebag' just by trying (and failling) to call out the members? You make a stupid plan, you get critized for it. Life's tough, just get your head out of your a** and get used to it, or i guess you can go cry to daddy, what ever floats your boat.
skater_kid_who_pwns
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skater_kid_who_pwns
4,375 posts
Blacksmith

Wow. Some of you guys are seriously underfuct. And a**holes to boot. Not to mention there are far too many "zombie specialists" on here with far too much free time to be pointing fingers at anyone else for lack of a life. Face it, ur a nerd behind a keyboard with nothing better to do than try and talk down to people over a fictional topic. But since it`s obvious that we both have the time, allow me to point out a few defining factors you may have overlooked in this plan that you so persistently hacked at.


I spy with my little eyes, a hypocrite.

And yes! Someone brings up plans from page 1-5! I have been waiting for that for AGES! Those where our firsts plans, yea they blew big ones, but from that we built on them and made them better.

Look dude. Don't get mad, calm your self down, and learn something. Your not gonna be going 60 off road, even 20 is a stretch. As for your guns, we already went over this.

Just to clear something.

We never said the world would be infected in less then two seconds. But your plan should be worse case scenario. Your plan should be as if it spread around you without you noticing. Not that it would happen, but you get my point.
ComradeWolf
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ComradeWolf
358 posts
Nomad

Mhm. Prepare for the worst, hope for the best. And honestly, you don't troll people. We are bad in habit of it, but only because we get people who come in, advertise sites we really don't care for, and have no relevance for any of the topics.

So, eithier you contribute to this thread, or get out.
We are all tired of whiny people who refuse to be positive with their plans.

Plus, be realistic, with your plans. I highly doubt you have that many weapons, even if your in country with pathetic gun licensing, I HIGHLY doubt you could've afforded all those weapons, and manage to license all of them.

So eithier your sporting illegal arms, or your sticking out your tongue and lying to us.

Be realistic with yuor next plan. And we'll reveiw it, focus on the survival tactics you used, what things you did, and so on. And remember, its not JUST zombie's out to kill you. You have other normal disease's, such as infections, food, water, and other uninfected humans will all be hindrances, and possibly kill you.

Because, i'll give you a scenario actually.

Your in a house, in a dry Desert like climate, and your in a small South Western Untied States town. There is a GAs station, 45 houses, all in main streets, and your right smack dab in the middle. There is also a small little conveineince store, a inn, a Clinic, and water treatment plants, and Solar panels with a inn in the town.

The outbreak has started inside the Inn, and it spreaded quickyl without notice. You are at least 700 KM from another town (which is close to 350 M)

And your town has a population of 2000. Now then, you only own one gun, a Makarov, and you only have about 1 clip.

You have a kitchen in your house, and 2 floors. A basement, and a ground level floor. You have a refridgerator full of about 4 days worth of food, and about mabye 40 canned Items, and a microwave. You also have a TV in your house, and outside, in your garage, you have a saw, a claw hammer, Nails and Screws, and screwdrivers, and also a Dirtbike, with about a half a tank full of gas, which will not make it alone to the next town.


Now, over 1400 people in your town are infected. And there is at least 5 groups of Looters now in your town, that are known for killign people for supplies. The Looters don't have vehicles, but are armed with firemens axes, crowbars, and small pistols, and some have Shotguns and hunting rifles.


So, with your things, what do you do now? You have not gone out of your house since you heard of the outbreak, you were still in shock, but now you regained consciousness, and there is at least 9 zombies outside your house, and they still haven't smelt you. You have no family in this town.

Now under these circumstances, and geussing on population of zombies, and looter groups, what would you do first?

EnterOrion
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EnterOrion
4,220 posts
Nomad

Wow. Some of you guys are seriously underfuct. And a**holes to boot. Not to mention there are far too many "zombie specialists" on here with far too much free time to be pointing fingers at anyone else for lack of a life. Face it, ur a nerd behind a keyboard with nothing better to do than try and talk down to people over a fictional topic. But since it`s obvious that we both have the time, allow me to point out a few defining factors you may have overlooked in this plan that you so persistently hacked at.


Apologize. Now.

Or you're never getting in. Actually, that is pretty close to the current situation.

I'll critique your plan once you do this, and until someone does, you're not getting in.
thoadthetoad
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thoadthetoad
5,642 posts
Peasant

What outside world? I'm pretty sure the zombies don't give a flying f*ck what you have to say.


Ruuuuuh Ruuuuh. Ruhruuuuh. Ruuuuuuuuuh. Moooooooaaaaaaan. Ruuuuuuuuuh.

...Ruh.

*prays for sticky*

It's about as likely as a half-decent plan on this god forsaken club :|
thoadthetoad
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thoadthetoad
5,642 posts
Peasant

Face it, ur a nerd behind a keyboard with nothing better to do than try and talk down to people over a fictional topic.

Oh god I'm going to have fun with this.

Well first off, bud, I'd just like to point out that you're the one trying to start up a flame war by doing this. Not to mention you make yourself out to be a hotshot who seems to know absolutely everything about the topic, when you didn't really know squat. Besides that zombies are zombies.

Also, on a extremely important side note:
PEOPLE, STOP CUSSING. I LOVE HOW YOU HAVE ADOPTED MY WAY OF CENSORSHIP, BUT THIS SORT OF THING IS WHAT MAKES US NEARLY LOCKED. SO PLEASE, LAY OFF THE DARN CURSE WORDS? USE EUPHAMISMS. LIKE TOOKIS. INSTEAD OF ARSE. OR JUST ARSE INSTEAD OF THE NORMALLY USED WORDS. I USE BOLD IN ORDER TO MAKE SURE YOU READ THIS BTW SO DON'T START YELLING AT ME.

Also, how many people did you think do the duck and cover strategy during the cold war just because the media told them to? How many people do you think go into brace position on a plane just because the plane's media told them to? F*ckn*ts none of them! They'd rather panic and yell "OMG WE'RE ALL GUNNA DIIIIEEEE!!1!one!!!111!1!!!eleven". People will panic. Also, keep in mind that people will probably be very gun-ho if they are redneck guntoters. Therefore there will be bites. It may not be too concentrated in your area, but I'm pretty sure that not many guys will take the initiative to shoot the thing in the head. They'll probably fuck with the zombies.

Also, full decimation would be in ~ two weeks, so you will be doing good in barricading yourself. In order to prevent general arseness against you I'd reccomend you provide an explanation for any weapon of sorts you have. Such as why you chose it, and how long you would keep it (temp weapon, perm weapon, etc.).

Also, it depends on what media you're talking about when it comes to the whole "lock your doors and hide in the crawlspace" idea. if it's like that fake left4dead corporation CEDA, then it wouldn't really prove to be effective. The zombies would break in with willpower alone and end up biting someone. Chain reactions can indeed be bad for the human populace!

I have a problem with smiling. Especially ones with goatee's. or is that a nose or some shat?

Oh god, I just realized that this is trollbait entirely! Or maybe just a bunch of matches that are lit under some gunpowder with a bunch of newspaper on top.

Everyone refrain from talking or criticizing this guy. If he can't take a few typed up words than he shouldn't be retorting back in anger. I'll get a mod to handle him.

Also, I have a lot of stern words for you guys. You are meant to criticize, not make fun of. Though it is totally fun, it is uncalled for and against the rules, as it would be considered flaming. Try to provide helpful advice as far as the plans go.
EnterOrion
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EnterOrion
4,220 posts
Nomad

Also, I have a lot of stern words for you guys. You are meant to criticize, not make fun of. Though it is totally fun, it is uncalled for and against the rules, as it would be considered flaming. Try to provide helpful advice as far as the plans go.


Wasn't me.

*whistles innocently*

Everyone refrain from talking or criticizing this guy. If he can't take a few typed up words than he shouldn't be retorting back in anger. I'll get a mod to handle him.


Yessir.
TrayDogenzaka
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TrayDogenzaka
386 posts
Nomad

Hey guys. Sorry that I haven't been on in... what, 20 pages or so? The flu hit my area hard (onou zombie flu!), and I've been sick as a dog. Though, as of today, I'm feeling a whole lot better, so I'll be rejoining the discussions.

I skimmed through the pages I missed, saw the plan everyone hates, and the smiley. (I hate the smiley. It reminds me of this old doll my sister use to have that's eyes followed me.) I can't quote the plan since it'd take too long and I have to go soon, but some of you guys aren't thinking clearly. I can't remember how many guns he said he had, but I have an uncle up in Mississippi that can top it. He has a whole side of his house dedicated to guns. (Pretty decent sized house, too.) All of them are licensed. He has old M1 Garands, He has some Russian bolt action rifles, PLENTY of WWI/II sub machine guns and machine guns. I don't know of any modern machine guns he has other than 2 AK-47s (one auto/semi, one semi/single shot). It was VERY hard for him the license all of those guns, but he did it. Tis possible, friends. Sorry of I ranted and didn't really help at all to any relevant topics. I'd talk more, but I'm supposed to be sleeping right now, since I'm not fully better.

Bjiscuit
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Bjiscuit
610 posts
Nomad

Your in a house, in a dry Desert like climate, and your in a small South Western Untied States town. There is a GAs station, 45 houses, all in main streets, and your right smack dab in the middle. There is also a small little conveineince store, a inn, a Clinic, and water treatment plants, and Solar panels with a inn in the town.

The outbreak has started inside the Inn, and it spreaded quickyl without notice. You are at least 700 KM from another town (which is close to 350 M)

And your town has a population of 2000. Now then, you only own one gun, a Makarov, and you only have about 1 clip.

You have a kitchen in your house, and 2 floors. A basement, and a ground level floor. You have a refridgerator full of about 4 days worth of food, and about mabye 40 canned Items, and a microwave. You also have a TV in your house, and outside, in your garage, you have a saw, a claw hammer, Nails and Screws, and screwdrivers, and also a Dirtbike, with about a half a tank full of gas, which will not make it alone to the next town.

Now, over 1400 people in your town are infected. And there is at least 5 groups of Looters now in your town, that are known for killign people for supplies. The Looters don't have vehicles, but are armed with firemens axes, crowbars, and small pistols, and some have Shotguns and hunting rifles.

So, with your things, what do you do now? You have not gone out of your house since you heard of the outbreak, you were still in shock, but now you regained consciousness, and there is at least 9 zombies outside your house, and they still haven't smelt you. You have no family in this town.

Now under these circumstances, and geussing on population of zombies, and looter groups, what would you do first?


Mmk, I bet its safe to assume that the looters would have secured the water and Solar pannels and most likely the inn. I think the best choice of action would be to get rid of all perishables, I.E. eat them/ m,aybe barter with the raiders, but thats risky as they like to kill people. And camp at home for a bit, as if i just recoverd from shock my thinking wouldnt be to straight at the moment. The next choice ofaction would be to either, 1. Find the looters and hope that they let me join them, seeing as i dont have much to take they might spare me and let me join said group. Or 2. Go rogue, as the looters wont likely be able to stay together all the time, it woul dbe possible to find one off by himself, kill him and take his wepons and equipment, this would be done without using the fire arm as it would alert any others and thus minimizing my chances of survival.

So really this scenario is basicly about surviving more then just zombies, but looters aswell as they seem to be hostile. I think my main objective would be to get water, somehow i am going to have to figure out how to aquire some, as i can go on for awhile without food, but water is a must, it will keep me going longer than food. after water, then find some place that might have items like, A-packs, MRE's etc. although i would like dried meat, s it is lighter and takes less space.
DefinitelyCrazy
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DefinitelyCrazy
344 posts
Nomad

You are meant to criticize, not make fun of. Though it is totally fun, it is uncalled for and against the rules, as it would be considered flaming.


Aye aye, Lieutenant Killjoy.
LiL_GaNgSta_BlAzE
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LiL_GaNgSta_BlAzE
2,269 posts
Jester

*Cough*

What's going on? My computer had been fried, had to get a new one. So.... what the hell?

So, I see DC is still demolishing post's.... hahahaha!

IEatZombieBrains
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IEatZombieBrains
3 posts
Nomad

first off i flamed noone & will be apologizing for nothing. I stated my completely relevant although somewhat arrogant plan(still better than anything I have read here) & was called everything from a liar to a d*psh*t to a 30 year old bum. I am undeniably in the right for what I said. So if you don`t like problems then don`t start them. But clearly many of you who chose to criticize didn`t choose to read what you were criticizing. First off, noone said anything about driving 60, or even 20 offroad. 60 is the speed I average in normal traffic & 20 would be my minimum average on/off road speed, although you would know that if you took more time reading & less time blindly hating. Also people are still trying to burn me saying things like I highly doubt you have that many weapons, even if your in country with pathetic gun licensing, I HIGHLY doubt you could've afforded all those weapons, and manage to license all of them.
Your ignorance shines brilliantly here. I own one pistol grip, 12 gauge, mossberg shotgun. Never claimed to own any other firearms. It cost me a grand total of just under $300 with 2 boxes of shells, a cleaning kit, a high viz magnetic sight(in red and green) & a shoulder strap. If it is that hard for you to believe that a man would have an extra $300 then you obviously have your own financial problems & probably shouldn`t be ribbing anyone about their income. Secondly, you don`t need a license to own a gun. The state merely requires that you be 18 years old & not convicted of any felonies or violent crimes. & for the third time, It isn`t meant to kill zombies, it is meant to kill people & would serve this purpose admirably. It is what I carry because people are real & zombies are not. I even mentioned switching to a more practical weapon in my original plan (but you wouldn`t have noticed because you were too busy trying to rip people to know what you were talking about).
I do however appreciate you reminding your friends that flaming people is inappropriate & immature. It is in no way conducive to a friendly, productive information sharing environment. I`m no longer interested in joining this "club" as I have challenged all who criticize to point out a better plan & yet here I sit on a site dedicated to the subject & containing almost 500 pages of submissions with the only plan not involving needlessly putting yourself in danger for limited benefit or cowering in a place that will eventually be overrun belonging to me. If you really think that you have something important to share then share it, but don`t come on here calling names & acting surprised when someone tells you to go f*** yourself. If anyone is going to try & reprimand anyone else at least make it the responsible parties.

DefinitelyCrazy
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DefinitelyCrazy
344 posts
Nomad

I even mentioned switching to a more practical weapon in my original plan (but you wouldn`t have noticed because you were too busy trying to rip people to know what you were talking about).


Now, if YOU read the responses you would have noticed that both me and Orion agreed with your new choice of weapon.

to point out a better plan


Once again, if you read my entire post you would notice that I in fact did point out a better plan.
skater_kid_who_pwns
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skater_kid_who_pwns
4,375 posts
Blacksmith

Alright. Due to people being arrogant (that's every one here, not just one person) I am going to post my plan. Feel free to pick it apart. Becuse honestly...there will be flaws. Nothings perfect.

I'm going to assume I am in my home when news of the outbreak reaches me.

I live in a trailer in Pennsylvania, about 50 out of pittsuurgh. Wehn news reached me, I would start filling sinks, bathtubs, and any contaners I can find with water. This will give me some water while I am in my home, and once the water is shut off.

Next would be to push couches, cahirs, ect. Against the doors. The windows will not be a problem, seeing as how there about....10-ish feet from the ground. I have tools to barricade windows if need be.

I do not own a gun, so I would grab the tire iron out of the car, and use that as my main weapon. It is basically a crow bar on one end, and a socket wrench on the other. Very solid, would crack skulls easy.

Once I was forced to leave, meaning i was out of food, and water, I would head next door. there are alot of homes in the trailer park, so finding none parishable food would be easy. HOw ever, I would have to be extremly cautious. My neiborghs, have a .33, a .22 pistol, and some other gun i can't remeber. I would take the two guns I mentioned, as I fired them before. Not the best, but better then nothing.

Once I had the guns (or failed at getting them) I would return home, and start filling a backpack with cloths. (jeans, jackets, gloves, ect.) And slid my boots on.

There is a lake no more then 10 miles from my house. It is man made, but well stocked with fish. There aer small islands through out it. I would get in one of the small row boats there, and head out to one of the lager islands. There I would attempt to make a small shelter. It wouldn't be the nicest shelter, but It would hold out some of the elements. It would most likely be made of Branches, and covered in mud. Again, not the best, but better then nothing.

there are homes close by I could ransake for food, assuming There wasn't tons of zombies around/inside them.

there is a town about 15 miles away, as well as ALOT of farm land. If it was summer, food would be easy to come by (livestock, and crops) But once that died/was used up, fishing hunting, and pillaging would be my only option.

My shelter is in the middle of a lake, so if zombies were to find me, they would be on the banks. I could go out in my boat, and shoot them from there.


Alrighty, there is my short term plan. Pick it apart.

TrayDogenzaka
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TrayDogenzaka
386 posts
Nomad

I don't like your plan, Skater! I can't find anything wrong with it!

The only problem I saw that would be significant would be your island shelter. If it rains too hard, your shelter would be flooded and you'd have to either sit on top, or go back to the mainland and rebuilt it later. Other than that, it was pretty good.

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