ForumsArt, Music, and WritingPeriodic Poetry Contest - Theme: Touch of Truth (Page 390, due Jan. 28)

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DragonMistress
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DragonMistress
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Blacksmith

First, I will post the overall rules, and then I will post the specifics about this week.

Original rules, as stated by Ubertuna:

It must fit the week's theme.
It must be submitted by the deadline.
It cannot have inappropriate language in it.
It cannot be stolen (if you plagiarize, we will find you).


Also:

The poem must be created for this contest
A user cannot win two weeks in a row (though everyone is welcome to submit every week!)
Only one submission per user will be accepted

As we all know, the winner will recieve a merit, and their poem will be featured on the _Poetry_ page.


OK, on to this week's topic...Again, we are having a style instead of a theme. Also, this week we are having TWO WEEKS to do it, instead of the usual one. Why? Because this will be an EPIC poem. Or, rather, a parody of an epic poem. Generally, epic poetry is very long, and tells the serious story of a heroic figure. Well, this week, the epic figure is YOU! Write a long poem (I'll leave the definition of 'long' up to you, but give it a good go) about the heroic story of you! It can be silly, serious, whatever... just have fun with it. You have two weeks, so have a great time!
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Quirinus1
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Quirinus1
157 posts
Shepherd

stupid banned-from-writing.

How comes that?
ug5151
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ug5151
587 posts
Nomad

The results were never posted. ._.

wolf1991
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wolf1991
3,437 posts
Farmer

>.> No they weren't, keen observation. Unfortuneatly circumstances beyond my control have made me unable to get sufficient time to judge, review and post. So, since today is finally my free day you shall have your results, I apologize.

However, a note to those of you who are new, or just unable to comprehend the time it takes to judge these things; it isn't as easy as you would expect. Also, the former judge, Parsat, was fantastic, so I try to match that.

wolf1991
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wolf1991
3,437 posts
Farmer

Third Place: Maverick4

Politics As Usual

Our Politicians control us;
The Scientist, they guide us through;
The Ignorant just lead us on,
The Ignorant just lead us on.

Sheep; we're lead down to the slaughter,
Invisible Hands help us through.
How Ignorant! We lead ourselves.
How Ignorant! We lead ourselves.

Can't you see as we bleed here,
The Stars that shine within our eyes?
Juxtaposed; Hallowed policy,
Juxtaposed; Hallowed policy.

You cast up dust to hide behind,
Atleast we'll know one certain fact:
That we know Death will take us home,
Look! Death has come to take us home.


I really enjoyed the repetitive lines in this one. I also enjoyed the fact that you didn't outright state the theme within the poem. It makes digging for it part of the experience, however, it wasn't hard. The title and subject gave it away. The thing unfound? The Truth.

Second Place: Quirinus1

Existentialism

Step by step, closer I come,
touching the rocks, rugged.
I feel the moist, the ages,
reminding my brief existence.

There I seek my refuge,
it is somewhat grey, dark.
Not foul, with smell, but cleansing,
as if it all was artificial, a fraud.

I find a rock to sit, to think,
clean water drips down from above,
it fills a pond, erodes the stone,
steels his precious metals. Thief!

Yelling at water. Then silence:
Darkness looks at me, the intruder.
Almost cursing me, for breaking the spell:
almost blaming me, for my pure existence.

His point made clear, I give in,
one solution remains, the eternal one.
I seek for a means to end this,
this lingering, between death and life.

Does it matter? That I was here?
Did it make a difference? And you?
What is your purpose of being?
Existing for the sake of existing?

That will not suffice.


A great title for a great poem. I particularly enjoyed this poem, because it reflected the title perfectly. The flow and rhythm was also top notch. I like how you incorporated the philosophical questioning with the metaphorical descriptions within your poem. The finishing touch, actually answering your own rhetoric was nicely done as well.

First Place and Merit Winner: Hypermnestra

Carpe Diem


Carpe diem! Or so we're told
It means to seize the day
They say "risks pay a hundredfold,
Don't throw your life away"

A thing unfound might just as well
Be gone, it's not enough
To live, for the world you must tell
You've diamonds* in the rough

A treasure, if it's left unfound
Will crumble into dust
And riches, though they may abound
Eventually** will rust.

A thing unfound is not the worst:
The thing that truly appalls
Is when, in blindness, you're immersed
And you do not look at all


This one may take some explaining... Right. So this was a real toss up between first and second place. I picked this poem because even though there doesn't seem to be a lot on the surface it has a lot of depth. This one focussed on the theme in a different manner that appealed to me, instead of looking for something, or even questioning after this unfound thing, subject of this poem was not to look. In fact, to find the unfound one must look away. The subtlety within this poem is exquisit, and while there may be technical errors I found this poem echoing a truth. All things will fade in time, thus to look is to never find.
wolf1991
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wolf1991
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Farmer

Right, so the next theme is: You

The deadline is July 21, 2011.

Take a good look at that theme writers. While it may look very simple I am hoping to challenge your creativity and subtlety once again. You see, the theme not only reflects a person, but an idea. And it doesn't have to reflect yourself at all. Keep that in mind.

Also, I apologize once more for the severely late judging

Ernie15
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Ernie15
13,344 posts
Bard

Finally, a theme that isn't too abstract for me to write about.

I'll write something once somebody else writes something first.

FloydTC
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FloydTC
2,906 posts
Nomad

you. not I, but you.
not anyone else. just you.
you are the lone wolf.

Maverick4
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Maverick4
6,800 posts
Peasant

Lifetime Serenity

How proud I march! On down the rows.
Brisling with buttons,
As the crowd cheers me homeward.

Simple facades; what could go wrong?
Look in my mirror
But I don't know who I am.

The gilded halls, and marble floors.
Reflect my pashion,
But they always feel so cold.

No one to blame except myself.
May be its too late,
And everything is all lost.

Oh cur'sed road! That I went down.
As blind as I was,
How eagerly I went there.

Now here I am; Its all in vain.
Serrepticiousness,
I can't let anyone know.

That fatal blow, that final strike.
The void consumes me,
And I collapse to the ground.

Now here I lie, inside my tomb.
I chose my own fate;
I got just what I deserve.

Maverick4
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Maverick4
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Peasant

In the third stanza, 'ashion' should be 'assion'.

In the sixth stanza, 'serrepticiousness' should be 'surreptitiousness'.

Kudos to Kyuozou for pointing that out.

wolf1991
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wolf1991
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Farmer

CONTEST DEADLINE IS IN 3 DAYS!

Quirinus1
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Quirinus1
157 posts
Shepherd

CONTEST DEADLINE IS IN 3 DAYS!

Relax, dont be rash.
No reason to be hasty,
life is a tortoise.
Quirinus1
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Quirinus1
157 posts
Shepherd

Dad

The moment of my joyous birth,
when I came to the cruel earth,
you say golden tears you cried,
for your son, your heir, your pride.

There you stand, your arms now fold,
you just look, your attitude is bold,
the man that defends, he who protects,
is brave, still nothing he expects.

The most bright I never was,
in music and song I was apt,
just another kid in class,
a thing you must accept.

There you sit, hair almost white.
So gentle and so kind, simple and outright.
Such pain as this, who had ever thought,
the torments that you sought.

I did not what you wanted me,
the things that I do best,
though you just can't see,
I do better than the rest.

There you lie, your face wearied,
all the suffering that you carried,
is all relieved utmost quick,
the tumors die that you made sick.

invisibleninjagirl
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invisibleninjagirl
29 posts
Nomad

Remember

Remember being young, spirited and care-free?
Not a worry in the world, just being happy.
Going out of your way to blow a dandilion,
Making selfish wishes, having heard none's crying.

Remember turning five, they shipped you away?
But you did not care, for you came home everyday.
Or maybe they kept you at home to learn,
To wonder of the world, of what you could earn.

Remember graduating, from the first state of learning?
Were you 11, or 12, or did you stay and keep earning?
It was a beautiful time, full of new hopes, new dreams,
But there was soon a new place, full of gloom and greed.

Remember attending the all new school?
Full of mean girls and bullies, you learn people are cruel
But, yet, you kept bright, on the right path.
For that, I am proud, of your chosen track.

Think of what's ahead, a whole other world!
Finished learning, a passion, growing more bold.
Someday, getting married, having kids of your own,
Turning a cold house into your warm home.

And yes, someday, you will grow old.
Someday, you'll be through, and become cold.
But, child, worry not, about when your time will pass,
For today, and forever, you have a world to attack.

Ernie15
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Ernie15
13,344 posts
Bard

I hope I'm not too late...

The universe cares not that you are here,
What are you but a lonely speck of dust?
Existence, less than what it may appear.

You need not shout, for you they will not hear.
And if they do, they'll cry out in disgust.
The universe cares not that you are here.

Your purpose in this world is not so clear.
It's neither beneficial nor unjust.
Existence, less than what it may appear.

Continuing to fade away each year,
You realize you barely cease to rust.
The universe cares not that you are here.

The story of your life is insincere.
There's nobody alive who you can trust.
Existence, less than what it may appear.

Let go of everything you've ever feared.
Make all your goals and wisdom more robust.
The universe cares not that you are here.
Existence, less than what it may appear.

thecattygrl
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thecattygrl
230 posts
Nomad

[No background this time guys... Srry ]

The World In A Card

She couldn't imagine
The world in a card
She couldn't pretend
She knew of that world

She tried to be open
But was that enough?
She wasn't really open
Because of... You know, well... Stuff

She thought not a soul
Can end my dismay
But unbenouced to her
It just seemed to happen that way

It was a soul
That let her see
But only a soul
A soul within she

He wouldn't except it
It was child's play
He became the best
With each passing day

A rival was one
A friend deep inside
But when she came along
It was on her he relied

A puzzle
A ponder
A question
A wonder

The would in her hands
In her hands is a card
She wouldn't believe it
The world in a card.

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