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Forums → Art, Music, and Writing → Periodic Poetry Contest - Theme: Touch of Truth (Page 390, due Jan. 28)

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DragonMistress
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DragonMistress
1,058 posts
Blacksmith

First, I will post the overall rules, and then I will post the specifics about this week.

Original rules, as stated by Ubertuna:

It must fit the week's theme.
It must be submitted by the deadline.
It cannot have inappropriate language in it.
It cannot be stolen (if you plagiarize, we will find you).


Also:

The poem must be created for this contest
A user cannot win two weeks in a row (though everyone is welcome to submit every week!)
Only one submission per user will be accepted

As we all know, the winner will recieve a merit, and their poem will be featured on the _Poetry_ page.


OK, on to this week's topic...Again, we are having a style instead of a theme. Also, this week we are having TWO WEEKS to do it, instead of the usual one. Why? Because this will be an EPIC poem. Or, rather, a parody of an epic poem. Generally, epic poetry is very long, and tells the serious story of a heroic figure. Well, this week, the epic figure is YOU! Write a long poem (I'll leave the definition of 'long' up to you, but give it a good go) about the heroic story of you! It can be silly, serious, whatever... just have fun with it. You have two weeks, so have a great time!
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Kyouzou
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Kyouzou
5,061 posts
Jester

Sorry Zaky, old boy, but the vote's been carried, you may consider yourself to be persona non grata. I suggest you start running right about now... *insert evil grin*

Maverick4
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Maverick4
6,800 posts
Peasant

Can I filibuster this bill?


*gavels you down*

You failed to gain recoqnition from the Senate Chair (me!). Please take your seat.

And besides, you can't get away with a fillibuster any more. Or atleast, you're not supposed to. If you have a Democratic chair, and a Democrat fillibuster's, they'd get away with it. And vice versa.
zakyman
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zakyman
1,627 posts
Peasant

You failed to gain recoqnition from the Senate Chair (me!). Please take your seat.


*sigh* Would the Chair please recognize my right to make a speech?

you may consider yourself to be persona non grata. I suggest you start running right about now...


But I can't run very fast...may I drive instead?
Maverick4
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Maverick4
6,800 posts
Peasant

*sigh* Would the Chair please recognize my right to make a speech?


The Chair recognizes the right of zakyman to speak at the well.

The Chair declines zakyman to speak.
zakyman
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zakyman
1,627 posts
Peasant

Would the Chair please allow me to say a few words? It is in the Senatoral Proceedings to allow those who wish to speak, speak if they have followed all of the necessary motions...

zakyman
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zakyman
1,627 posts
Peasant

Also I object to my labeling as a persona non grata. I have committed no crimes to be labeled as such, and I demand that my accuser be rebuked in an open session.

Maverick4
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Maverick4
6,800 posts
Peasant

The Chair denies zakyman the right to approach the well.

The Chair upholds the labeling of zakyman as a persona non grata. The Chair recognizes that zakyman attempted a coup d'etat, and ask that the Baliff removes zakyman from the chambers and has him charged with treason.

*gavel gavel*

zakyman
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zakyman
1,627 posts
Peasant

The Chair upholds the labeling of zakyman as a persona non grata. The Chair recognizes that zakyman attempted a coup d'etat, and ask that the Baliff removes zakyman from the chambers and has him charged with treason.


I object to the charges presented against me. I had only attempted a filibuster, which is standard Senatoral procedure.
Kyouzou
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Kyouzou
5,061 posts
Jester

It's called a militarized overthrow of the current government. If we win you will be labeled enemy of the state. I suggest you join, or die


You were saying?

The Chair finds Zakyman guilty of High Treason, the punishment is death by firing squad.

You will be given one week to make a suitable appeal and prove your innocence, execution is scheduled for October 2, 2011.
Parsat
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Parsat
2,180 posts
Blacksmith

Sorry guys for the delay. Got caught all of a sudden in the flow when I was in the ebb a moment ago. I've asked Kyouzou to judge, because I trust him. If he doesn't take it, then wolf should step up again.

zakyman
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zakyman
1,627 posts
Peasant

Parsat, I am immediately appealing my sentence of death handed down by this kangaroo court, and are requesting a full pardon. Sarcasm written over the internet is not to be taken as an actual act of violence. Plus, I was not allowed to say anything in my defense, or present mitigating evidence to possibly lessen the sentence. I request that my sentence be reversed and rendered.

IcyIndia
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IcyIndia
1,344 posts
Nomad

*jumps up and down in anticipation for the judging*

I wanna write for the next theeeeeeeeeme!

zakyman
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zakyman
1,627 posts
Peasant

The Chair finds Zakyman guilty of High Treason, the punishment is death by firing squad.


I object to the sentence presented to me on the grounds that you are not the Senatoral Chair, and that no evidence was presented by either the prosecution or my defense council. I also object to the fact that I am required to prove innocence, as the presumtion is that I am innocent. As I have not had a fair trial, I protest this sentence, the court, and its related verdicts. I will file a habeus corpus petition in the next few days to get a trial.
Maverick4
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Maverick4
6,800 posts
Peasant

you are not the Senatoral Chair


I am the Chair. And its 'Senatorial'.

Spell Safe.

no evidence was presented by either the prosecution


You yourself confessed to a militarized usurptation of the government in place. Thats plenty of evidence.

I also object to the fact that I am required to prove innocence, as the presumtion is that I am innocent.


The evidence that has been put forth clearly points to a verdict of guilty. Also: See below.

As I have not had a fair trial


By attempting a coup of the inplaced government, you have hereby forfeited your rights as a citizen of this government. Therefor, you are labeled as a terrorist, and have no rights as such.

I will file a habeus corpus petition


Dismissed. You are here, are you not? 'Habeas Corpus' means you must have the body, and the fact that you are attempting to appeal this descision by this tribunal further supports that fact.

I hereby declare the defendant, zakyman, guilty on charges of Treason, Terrorism, perjury, lieing under oath, and inhibitation of a Senatorial Investigation. The punishment for such crimes is death. You will be hung by the neck until dead in five days time, at 6:00 PM on Friday, September 30th. May God have mercy on your soul.

*gavel gavel*
zakyman
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zakyman
1,627 posts
Peasant

I hereby declare the defendant, zakyman, guilty on charges of Treason, Terrorism, perjury, lieing under oath, and inhibitation of a Senatorial Investigation. The punishment for such crimes is death. You will be hung by the neck until dead in five days time, at 6:00 PM on Friday, September 30th. May God have mercy on your soul.


Again, I protest the proceedings as unfair, biased, and outrageous. I was not given an attorney, either a civilian or military lawyer, and no court proceedings were undertaken. I respectfully request a stay of execution until my lawyers are able to present mitigating evidence. As I am not a threat to society, and will not commit future crimes, I also request that my sentence be vacated, or reduced.
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