ForumsArt, Music, and WritingHaiku Contest - Broken Bond (page 531, due: Feb 2)

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Maverick4
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Maverick4
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Peasant

A Haiku is a Japanese lyric verse form having three unrhymed lines of five, seven, and five syllables, traditionally invoking an aspect of nature or the seasons.

Well, that said, heres the rules:

1) The Haiku must be original (no plagarizing)!
2) It must fit the weeks theme
3) It must be submitted before the deadline
4) It must be submitted for the contest (no using works previously written)
5) One Submission per user
6) The Same User cannot win twice in a row (but there welcome to submit!)

Hopefully oneday the winner could get a merit...

The Deadline will always be a Wednsday, so the deadline for the first theme will be Wednsday, September 2. The theme is The Pond

(special thanks to 'thisisnotanalt'

  • 5,299 Replies
FallenSky
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FallenSky
1,813 posts
Peasant

Well anyhow, I guess it IS kind of funny but still, it's very innapropriate! Get me Dan?

MoonFairy
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MoonFairy
3,386 posts
Shepherd

Judging.... judging.... JUDGING?! Pressure people pressure.
I really need judging done BEFORE the 28th! i am leaving then, and i wont have interent connection for like 2 weeks. so HURRY.

FallenSky
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FallenSky
1,813 posts
Peasant

Bhahaha, don't hold your breath Moon!

thepossum
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thepossum
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Nomad

So the deadline was on Monday. When's the judging? I figured it would have been Tuesday. Maybe samy just can't get on... Anyone else for voting for temporary judge for this round?

EnterOrion
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EnterOrion
4,220 posts
Nomad

Judging now.

Good thing there weren't 50 entries this time. Those ones actually give me a good reason to procrastinate.

Anyways, here you go.

Running Away Award - Dazpiece

Twilight in the park
Desperately she glided
Through the bamboo trees.

I got an image of this person running away. The second line made the entire haiku. 'Desperately' and glided normally don't go together, but in this instance it does. Well done.

My Haiku!

A bolt of lightning
As fast as the speed of light
Hypersonic death

What's there to judge? It's so amazingly awesome it pwns the competition. I'm joking, of course. Take this one as you (people reading the judging) wish. I just thought I'd put it.

Bullet Train Award - FallenSky


A radiant blur
Rolling on winding railways
An angel of steel

The word 'radiant' seemed a little out of place on the first line, but otherwise the rest is perfect. It meets the flow perfectly, just the word itself seems off. That does let it down a little, sadly. Good haiku though.

Mathematical Love Award - aknerd

The integral of
all my life's velocity
brought me here, to you

Quoting you:

...I miss calculus.


The comment you put at the bottom totally made the entire haiku make sense, so I had to put it, lol. Anyways, once again you confused me. I had to look up what an integral is, and any time you make the judge learn something, it's pure win.

I See a Car Award - thepossum

A car passing by
Is a blur on the highway
Going ninety-five

It's good, but just really generic. It's more or less a straightforward sentence.

I Think this is About Marriage . . . Award - Devoidless

Meet, cherish, propose
One could not commit to it
Fleeing, tears, remorse

Is it? I really couldn't decipher 100% the meaning out of this one even after reading it a dozen times. I couldn't quite get it. But it's good, just I'm not sure what the meaning is.

Sprinting Award - Beastahayes

Speeding to the end
Sprinting past competition
Breaking all records

It's rather obviously about running. Its flow is good, but it seems repetitive. I can't fault you for it though, we've all done it. Well done.

Adrenaline Award - 1337Player

Running is my thing
I feel the adrenaline
When I am losing...

After the last one the running theme kinda lost the creativity, something I place heavy emphasis. The critiquing is pretty simple. Good rhythm, doesn't have a stop and start vocabulary and seems good with usage of words. Well done.

Ninja Award - MoonFairy

Goin by so fast
You won't see a single thing
Cuz ima ninja

Meh. It's okay. The grammar sorta killed it. Good try though.

Hallucination Award - Parsat

Pop a pill or two
Feelings of pink elephants
Daaaaammmnn, that's the good stuff

Taking too much LSD if you're starting to see pink elephants. xD

Very creative use of the speed theme, definitely unexpected. The rhythm is perfect. Well done.

Meth Award - DDX

My vision is blurred
my heartbeat jumps out my chest
It's amphetamines

Something tells me you weren't even trying on this one to do anything except be funny. Well done, you succeeded. xD

That's the individual awards. Hopefully no one screams at me.

============================================================

Now for the placement. I'll set three runnerups and a winner, which will as always receive a merit from a mod of their choice. I may also add an honorable mention.

Fourth, Bronze - aknerd

The integral of
all my life's velocity
brought me here, to you

You made me learn something. Win upon itself. That and a good haiku equal placing for you.

Third, Silver - Dazpiece

Twilight in the park
Desperately she glided
Through the bamboo trees.

That was good, quite good. Imagery was flawless, even perfect. Well done.

Second, Gold - Parsat

Pop a pill or two
Feelings of pink elephants
Daaaaammmnn, that's the good stuff

I gotta give the creative spin and the imagery to this one. It's very very very, very good. Well done.

First, Platinum and the Merit Winner - Devoidless

Meet, cherish, propose
One could not commit to it
Fleeing, tears, remorse

It's almost a good thing for the other contestants that you don't enter very often, lol. Every time you do it's awesome. While I can't be 100% sure my interpretation was correct, if it was, that makes it an almost perfect win. Awesome job.

Now go give yourself a merit. Because you can.

As for the honorable mention, that goes to DDX with the lulz haiku. It would've placed had Parsat not beat you to the kick. That and I literally laughed out loud.

As for the next theme, that shall be

Monsoon (inspired by this sudden rainstorm I just had today)

The deadline will be Saturday, June 5th, and 11:53pm.

Now, my little tribute to Dudeguy, Happy Haiku'ing!
FallenSky
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FallenSky
1,813 posts
Peasant

Hmm, I'm sad about the judging, I thought that I had nailed it so perfectly...Technology has speeded up life so much it's actually ridiculous, and yet we hail it as a god.
*sob* Well, good job everyone and as always, good luck for the next round!

Avorne
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Avorne
3,085 posts
Nomad

Pure drops upon stone
Howling winds crash through the street
Onyx clouds encroach

thepossum
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thepossum
3,035 posts
Nomad

In southern Asia,
The seasonal wind does blow,
Bringing rain with it.

This was based off the monsoon definition I found online.

samdawghomie
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samdawghomie
3,550 posts
Peasant

I look forth in wait
For the annual monsoon
To help my crops grow

Well, it's been along time since I last entered this contest in the darkness theme. I guess I could go at it again.

MoonFairy
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MoonFairy
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Shepherd

Ah I failed at that last one.
here goes another failure...

Went through the monsoon
Into the eye of the storm
Finally, there is peace


XD Epic fail

thepossum
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thepossum
3,035 posts
Nomad

It is a fail. The last line has six syllables. It's not even a Haiku.

Nater
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Nater
1,296 posts
Nomad

wait is the theme still speed??

thepossum
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thepossum
3,035 posts
Nomad

No, it is monsoon.

1337Player
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1337Player
1,766 posts
Peasant

Lol Yeah about my haiku, I realized it sounded horrible.

Okay... monsoon here we go,

The rain patters down,
The wind makes my clothes fly up,
People saw me nude.

thepossum
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thepossum
3,035 posts
Nomad

People saw me nude.


0.o Is this based on a real story? Because then I would classify it as a tragedy. The victim: People.
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