A man walks into a bar at the top of a high building. He sees a man go up to the counter, order a beer, and jump out the window. 5 minutes later, the same man comes back, orders another beer, and jumps out again. He comes back a third time, and this time the first man asks him how he does it. The man replied, "It's easy. The air bubbles in the beer make you float down gently do the ground." So the first man orders a beer, jumps out the window, and lands with a splat on the sidewalk. The bartender says to the other man, "You know, Superman, you're a real jerk when you're drunk."
My Girlfriend asked me tease her; I said "Alright Fatty". She sat me down for one of those important relationshippy talks the other week, she said "Adam we're at a crossroads in our relationship; down one road is love and happiness and the other..... well the other is a dead end" I said "That's not a crossroads that's a T-Junction Love". Nut I had too dump her she was such a hypocrite. She said she liked surprises but when shw found out I was sleeping with her sister >_>
person 1: knock knock! person 2: who der??? person 1: check you lazy person! person 2: what?! im not lazy!! person 1: yesh you iz!! person 2: nu uh!!! person 3: shutup.
now that was a pointless, and stupi joke that i heard between two conversing penguins...
A man walks into a bar at the top of a high building. He sees a man go up to the counter, order a beer, and jump out the window. 5 minutes later, the same man comes back, orders another beer, and jumps out again. He comes back a third time, and this time the first man asks him how he does it. The man replied, "It's easy. The air bubbles in the beer make you float down gently do the ground." So the first man orders a beer, jumps out the window, and lands with a splat on the sidewalk. The bartender says to the other man, "You know, Superman, you're a real jerk when you're drunk."
HAHAHAHAHA Nice one!
[quote]5 guys walk into a bar. the 6th one ducked
Ohhhh I get it now! Lol i was like... what? Lol these are hilarious!
Dang that last post didn't work at all for some reason (0_o) but I have one:
Two men and an under-age girl walk into court. The judge says "what are you accused of?" to the first man. He replies "I was caught blowing bubbles in the pond." Confused, the judge asks the second man what he was accused of. Again, the man replies "I was caught blowing bubbles in the pond." The judge was about to let them leave, until he asked the girl "what's your name?" And the girl replies "i'm bubbles"
You should have jumped up when she sat down to enforce her fatness.
Ny coincidense I worked out recently that the worst thing you can say when a woman says "does my bum lok big in this?" isn't "yes".... it's "Let me step back and get it all in"
These following 2 jokes aren't necesarily the best just the shortest I know (try and beat me):
Venisons dear isn't it. (doesn't really work written down so read it aloud of you don't get it)
Dwarf Shortage.
I saw a newspaper headline it said "BRITAIN FACES CRISIS" I thoguht 'what? we're running out of faces?!?!"
The next day the front page said "MAN HELD AFTER RAPE" I thought 'What? He cuddled?!?!" (sorry for that one)
