Forums → WEPR → Affection, love, desire?

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Zophia

9,434 posts

Scribe

Posted July 3, '10 3:21pm UTC

This thread is created due to a conversation in this thread, to stop that one from going too off topic.
So here goes my badly constructed OP.

The opinion that "if she loves you, she will want to have sex with you - if she doesn't want to have sex with you (yet), she doesn't love you (yet)".
Love = desire.
Nonsexual love (for one's family and friends, or even pets) is then only affection?

That might be a matter of semantics, but the opinion that sexual desire always accompanies genuine feelings of love is what got brought up.

Compare Strop's opinion of "Love = Care and commitment" - also catch up on this page and the preceding to know exactly where this came from and find the stuff I possibly should have mentioned.

Also see the Triangular Theory of Love for an (in my opinion) rather plausible way of "sorting" types of love (the Wikipedia article currently covers it well, and I can't find the place I heard of it first, so my apologies if you distrust that wiki).

Do you not love someone if you do not desire sexual contact with them?

[i]This thread is created due to a conversation in [url=http://armorgames.com/community/thread/5812863/wrong/page/1]this thread[/url], to stop that one from going too off topic.\r\nSo here goes my badly constructed OP.[/i]\r\n\r\nThe opinion that [b]"if she loves you, she will want to have sex with you - if she doesn't want to have sex with you (yet), she doesn't love you (yet)"[/b].\r\n  Love = desire.\r\nNonsexual love (for one's family and friends, or even pets) is then only affection?\r\n\r\nThat might be a matter of semantics, but the opinion that sexual desire always accompanies genuine feelings of love is what got brought up.\r\n\r\nCompare Strop's opinion of "Love = Care and commitment" - also catch up on [url=http://armorgames.com/community/thread/5812863/wrong/page/3]this page and the preceding[/url] to know exactly where this came from and find the stuff I possibly should have mentioned.\r\n\r\nAlso see [url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Triangular_theory_of_love]the Triangular Theory of Love[/url]  for an (in my opinion) rather plausible way of "sorting" types of love [i](the Wikipedia article currently covers it well, and I can't find the place I heard of it first, so my apologies if you distrust that wiki)[/i].\r\n\r\nDo you not love someone if you do not desire sexual contact with them?

37 Replies

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Kevin4762

2,420 posts

Nomad

Posted July 4, '10 12:38am UTC

Kaboni, you just explained why lust is underlying love. You have sexual desire for Megan Fox, but you don't love her just because you want to fuck her. You want to have sex with her because you love her. You care about her. You are affectionate towards her.

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MoonFairy

3,386 posts

Shepherd

Posted July 4, '10 12:54am UTC

Kaboni's above post = Sex
Kevin's above post = making love.
Having sex is when you don't give a crap about the other person, just satisfying your desire.
Making love is when you have affetion for the person. Not just wanting to screw them.

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Kevin4762

2,420 posts

Nomad

Posted July 4, '10 12:54am UTC

Exactly. You are lustful towards her, but you don't love her.

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Kevin4762

2,420 posts

Nomad

Posted July 4, '10 12:57am UTC

Kaboni's above post = Sex
Kevin's above post = making love.
Having sex is when you don't give a crap about the other person, just satisfying your desire.
Making love is when you have affetion for the person. Not just wanting to screw them.

Yes! Finally, somebody understands what I'm saying. I just wish Strop had a dog in this fight.

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Motorheadbanger

279 posts

Nomad

Posted July 4, '10 1:21am UTC

I love girls that put out.

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Secretmapper

1,747 posts

Nomad

Posted July 4, '10 12:21pm UTC

Do you not love someone if you do not desire sexual contact with them?

I would say no. That means if you have kids you want to have eh* with them and act as a silly pedophile just to show them you *love* them.

Some people do think though that doing it is the greatest evidence that you love a person (intimate *sex* rather than for pleasure)

But if you really love someone, its going to feel a LOT weirder than that. Something like you will risk your life for her, or something like that. As if your willing to give up anything for her (as long as it doesn't get stupid)

This is of course, my opinion only

Let me go to an excerpt of a novel and say what you think is more preferable to you:

"I believe you," she stated and stared at me, who wore an expression of disbelief. "I do believe you Li. How do I convince you of that?"

She started unbuttoning her school blouse and I panicked, blushed and tried to stop her, "What are you doing?"

"Make love to me. This is the only way for you to be convinced that I do believe you"

"Naomi" I interrupted. "Things don't work this way."

"They don't?" She asked, tears blinding her eyes.

"No"

"Then how am I supposed to convince you?" She wailed.
I said nothing but continued to look at her.

"You don't understand what I feel!" Naomi burst out suddenly, catching me by surprise.

"Naomi?"

------------

"I believe you," she stated and stared at me, who wore an expression of disbelief. "I do believe you Li. How do I convince you of that?"

She started unbuttoning her school blouse and I panicked, but I liked it. "Okay lets make love" *spurt*spurt*

[quote]Do you not love someone if you do not desire sexual contact with them?[/quote]\r\n\r\nI would say no. That means if you have kids you want to have eh* with them and act as a silly pedophile just to show them you *love* them.\r\n\r\nSome people do think though that doing it is the greatest evidence that you love a person (intimate *sex* rather than for pleasure)\r\n\r\nBut if you really love someone, its going to feel a LOT weirder than that. Something like you will risk your life for her, or something like that. As if your willing to give up anything for her (as long as it doesn't get stupid)\r\n\r\nThis is of course, my opinion only\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\nLet me go to an excerpt of a novel and say what you think is more preferable to you:\r\n\r\n"I believe you," she stated and stared at me, who wore an expression of disbelief. "I do believe you Li. How do I convince you of that?"\r\n\r\nShe started unbuttoning her school blouse and I panicked, blushed and tried to stop her, "What are you doing?"\r\n\r\n"Make love to me. This is the only way for you to be convinced that I do believe you"\r\n\r\n"Naomi" I interrupted. "Things don't work this way."\r\n\r\n"They don't?" She asked, tears blinding her eyes.\r\n\r\n"No"\r\n\r\n"Then how am I supposed to convince you?" She wailed.\r\nI said nothing but continued to look at her.\r\n\r\n"You don't understand what I feel!" Naomi burst out suddenly, catching me by surprise.\r\n\r\n"Naomi?"\r\n\r\n\r\n------------\r\n\r\n"I believe you," she stated and stared at me, who wore an expression of disbelief. "I do believe you Li. How do I convince you of that?"\r\n\r\nShe started unbuttoning her school blouse and I panicked, but I liked it. "Okay lets make love" *spurt*spurt*

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Kevin4762

2,420 posts

Nomad

Posted July 4, '10 6:03pm UTC

Secretmapper, I suggest you read all of my previous posts because I don't want to keep repeating myself.

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