"I'm the most recognized and loved man that ever lived cuz there weren't no satellites when Jesus and Moses were around, so people far away in the villages didn't know about them."
Momma always said life is like a box of chocolates,you never know what you get
"My Mama always said, 'Life is like a box of chocolates; you never know what you're gonna get.'" -Forrest Gump
And I said that on the first page.
Here are some more that I like: A man should look for what is, and not for what he thinks should be. -Albert Einstein
We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them. -Albert Einstein
Any intelligent fool can make things bigger and more complex... It takes a touch of genius - and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction. -Albert Einstein
"People fear death even more than pain. It's strange that they fear death. Life hurts a lot more than death. At the point of death, the pain is over. Yeah, I guess it is a friend."
- Jim Morrison
"I don't understand people who hide from their past."
-Sophia Loren
"Welcome to my nightmare. I think you're going to like it. There'll be some more when you come down."
-Alice Cooper
"The opposite of love is not hate; it's indifference."
-Elie Wiesel
"Hate leaves ugly scars; love leaves beautiful ones."
-Mignon McLaughlin
"If something is truly important to you... even if it's heart-breaking, even if it's sorrowful... you keep on trying and trying, even if you lose your life, you keep on protecting it with these two arms! Then, even if you die, you leave behind the proof that you are a man... forever..."
-Kaiza
I can say Chinichanga in seven languajes.
Zippty do dah, zippty-ay, Iâm gonna blow all you dirtbags away. Plenty of bullets Iâm gonna spray, Zippty do dah, zippty-ay
You look familiar, did I spin you like a beanie propeller and leave you in a motel room in Dubuque?
So I look up, and who is standing over me but Captain America? So he throws his shield at me and I duck and it hits a tank of a viral diarrehic agent. Brother, let me tell you, you havenât seen anything until youâve seen Captain America leave the scene of a fight because heâs gotta â" and I do mean GOTTA â" empty his bowels.
my haiku, I hate broccoli, it is disgusting, why canât it be meat?
Sorry, I use humor to deflect my insecurities. Plus, Iâm hilarious, so donât hate.
Who dares summon the master of glib, the deliverer of one-liners and the shogun of sarcasm?
Look, Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow! Itâs going to be an early winter!
Are you talking to yourself or do you see little yellow boxes too?
He inventer rubber? Well I owe grandpa one, thats for sure.
Sâmatter Buddy? You look a little â" whatâs the word Iâm looking for here â" Stupid.
I love a sturdy woman like me beloved Beaâ¦
Not enough to justify what's about to happen to my pedicure. And I paid extra for the little Blackest Night symbols, too. My feets is a rainbow of power...
Duh! Paper or plastic? Hellooo? You have any idea what plastic bags do to the environment? I'm Al Gore's message of death, bee-yotch!
No--wait-- do you have any idea how many STD's I could have?
Can you send me forward to the time when I was mowing my lawn and my next door neighbor, Mrs. Nowicki, asked if I could rub lotion on her back and I ran and locked myself in the Bathroom? I'd really like a do-over on that one, please.
UGH! That was awful...all my thoughts strung together so dreadfully dull and plodding...like some glacially moving freight train of suck! My God...that must be what it's like...to be a total loser like you!
I've been besmirched! This besmirchment will not stand!
Yeah. That is a gun in my pants. But that doesn't mean I'm not happy to see you...
Oh, no! He's beating our meat!
You're looking at the chihuahua, right? Sometimes I go too far, I'm the first to admit it.
Bring me more Pop Rocks and Dr. Pepper. Prepare to bathe my monkeys.
You have any idea how hard it is to find a joint that'll serve a guy in a mask and bandolier? They won't even let me into Taco Bell!
You should talk. Your costume's so tight you can tell what religion you are. Ever hear of a cup?
That a giant fiberglass weenie or are you just happy to see me?
Dude, I had to hack that off to save you from zombie germs. You should totally put me on your Christmas card list.
Come ta think of it -- I've seen tougher KEN dolls than you! An' I mean take yer pick here -- mod-hair Ken -- disco Ken -- summer fun Ken -- I let Barbie whip me 'cos I'm a wuss Ken -- Any o' you guys lissenin' t'me?
"Did some say, "Chimichanga"? Never mind. That was just the sound of my skull and brains healing."
Deadpool 1
If you don't let me go, I'm gonna lick your hand.
"Pwangg?" Trees don't go "Pwangg--" Llamas don't go "Pwangg--" Nothing found in nature goes "Pwangg", which means -- we're officially hip deep in the smelly stuff.
Deadpool 2
"II eat the uncertainty principle for breakfast. I was born the original loose cannon. -- and I am one unpredicitible feather-pluckin' walrus! Koo-koo-ka-freakin'-choo!"
Deadpool 3
Hairy Zeus on a traffic light!
Shenanigans? Did you just curse me out in Irish?
Deadpool 4
You mean.. Iâm losing my uncanny knack to tell the Olsen twins apart?
Excuse me, sir? I represent the Canadian Ex-boy scouts Association, and it's time or our annual blood drive!
Deadpool 6
There's this problem, Weas... I sort of gave up Killing for Lent...
Yeah? Well you have a big head. No backsies.
Daredevil/Deadpool Annual
The sweet kiss of vengeance in teh hands of the proletariat at last... NOOGIE!
Okay, Daddy... After this can we go to Central Park and watch the bums scare tourists? Huh? Can we?
Okay, Campers! Everyone line up single file... it's polka time!
Deadpool 1 (1994)
You have any idea how hard it is to find a joint that'll serve a guy in a mask and bandolier? They won't even let me into Taco Bell!
These good looks, my friend, were a present of the Canadian Gummint. -DeadPool
"The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone else to blame it on." -Robert Bloch. "Common sense is not so common."-Voltaire "There are no rewards or punishments; only consequences."-Dean William R. Inge "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." -Albert Einstein.
