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It is 1862 and you have arrived in Dallas, Texas. You just couldnât stand New England and its big crowded cities and bitter cold winters. Sometimes you didnât even have enough money and food to keep going on. One day you decided to sell your store and move to the Old West to make something of yourself. You didnât know what; you just wanted to be something. When you finally got to Dallas it finally hit you! You said,â Forget being a store keeper, I want to fight!â Which means to you that you could be one of two things an Outlaw or a Sheriff, but first you would have to prove it to the people. Would you be the Sheriff protecting the citizens, cleaning the streets of evil, or would you be the Outlaw striking fear and hate into the people? It all begins here. All you brought with you is what you packed and that is $200.00 dollars, the clothes youâre wearing, and a Map of Texas.
The nickname is not mandatory.
Character Sheet
Name: First name ânicknameâ last name
Age: 19-30
Appearance: At least four things
Bio: 3-6 sentences I gave you some of it now just add on
Perk: You can make your own
Traits: One good and one bad*
-----------------------------
Gun:
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: Map of Texas
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $200.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 100%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 0
Reputation is very simple; basically if you want to be a Sheriff you need your Rep to have a positive Rep. If you want to be an Outlaw you want your Rep to be negative. You can raise it or lower it by doing certain good/bad deeds. There is also going to be a neutral deed sometimes. The neutral deed gives you neither positive/negative Rep. You can change from being an Outlaw to a Sheriff or a Sheriff to an Outlaw at anytime by lowering/raising your Reputation.
* You will have to overcome your bad trait and then you can change it to a good trait.
Hope you like it. This is my first one.
- 283 Replies
Name: Jack "Wide Eye" Northrup
Age: 63
Appearance: Thin build, a short 5'3, long grey beard, balding head
Bio: An old prospector who tried to strike it rich when he was in his 40s. When he was 58 he was an unlucky bystander in a bar fight, which injured his left leg and now he limps. He spends his money traveling to where people tell him gold was recently found.
Perk: Keen Eye/ Dead Eye(Good for spotting gold and keeping an eye on potential thieves)
Traits: Greedy, will do almost anything for money, this is also his downside.
-----------------------------
Gun: Dragoon 1st Model Black Powder Pistol
Melee Weapon: Shovel
Equipment: Map of Texas, Shovel, Pickaxe
Ammo: 43 (bullets)
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: Pieces of Jerky (6), Pieces of Chicken (3), Sliced Pork (6), Corn (10), Bottles of Milk (2), Satchels of Water (3), Bottle of Whiskey (3)
Money: $57.55
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 71%
Stamina: 52%
Reputation: 36
The man says," Thanks here is your room key."
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Name: Marcus "No Face" Smith
Age: 28
Appearance: Mustache. Scars all over body from a fire when i was 15. Never Smiles. Strong as hell
Bio: My face took a bad hit in the fire there for the name No face.
My father was a banker and my mom a gunshop owner.
I killed a man when i was 18 with a knife
Perk: I am very good money
Traits: I stand insults. If someone is mean to someone else I HAVE to beat the crap out of em
-----------------------------
Gun: 1873 Colt Peacemaker Pistol(2), Stagecoach Shotgun
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: Map of Texas
Ammo: 120 bullets, 30 shotgun shells
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: Malt
Money: $108.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 96%
Stamina: 89%
Reputation: 5
Well you need to buy a horse or take the train to get to a different town.
Name: Jack "Wide Eye" Northrup
Age: 63
Appearance: Thin build, a short 5'3, long grey beard, balding head
Bio: An old prospector who tried to strike it rich when he was in his 40s. When he was 58 he was an unlucky bystander in a bar fight, which injured his left leg and now he limps. He spends his money traveling to where people tell him gold was recently found.
Perk: Keen Eye/ Dead Eye(Good for spotting gold and keeping an eye on potential thieves)
Traits: Greedy, will do almost anything for money, this is also his downside.
-----------------------------
Gun: Dragoon 1st Model Black Powder Pistol
Melee Weapon: Shovel
Equipment: Map of Texas, Shovel, Pickaxe
Ammo: 43 (bullets)
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: Pieces of Jerky (6), Pieces of Chicken (3), Sliced Pork (6), Corn (10), Bottles of Milk (2), Satchels of Water (3), Bottle of Whiskey (3)
Money: $57.55
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 71%
Stamina: 52%
Reputation: 36
I go to the room and rest for the night.
Name: Brandon Thomason
Age: 19
Appearance: black Trench coat, black jeans, black rawhide cowboy hat, Pale skin, blue eyes, black hair
Bio: Brandon wanted something new when he came to the west. He always thought that the cities were boring and hard to traverse. He decided to head west and be somebody.
Perk: Watch your step - footsteps are silent even when running.
Traits: Easily-angered, charming
-----------------------------
Gun:
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: Map of Texas
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $200.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 100%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 0
Can I still join?
Name: Drix "Devshot" Winterfield
Age: 21
Appearance: Tall, 6' feet flat, royal blue eyes, well built and normal skin tone
Bio: Drix was a very smart guy. Even though with his well-built body, he's personality is quite silent. His mother and father left him while he was young, he was left in an orphanage and attempted to escape. Living now, with his store down, he finds himself to make a name of his own.
Perk: Good Survivability
Traits: Determined, Pessimistic
-----------------------------
Gun:
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: Map of Texas
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $200.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 100%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 0
Name: Brandon Thomason
Age: 19
Appearance: black Trench coat, black jeans, black rawhide cowboy hat, Pale skin, blue eyes, black hair
Bio: Brandon wanted something new when he came to the west. He always thought that the cities were boring and hard to traverse. He decided to head west and be somebody.
Perk: Watch your step - footsteps are silent even when running.
Traits: Easily-angered, charming
-----------------------------
Gun:
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: Map of Texas
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $200.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 100%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 0
You arrived in Dallas,Texas as so as you got off the train you saw a welcome sign saying,"Welcome to Dallas,Texas the friendliest place around!" population 100. When you look down at the small town you recognized a some of the buildings: A Bar,Genral Store, An Inn, and a Sheriff Office. When you start to walk foward you see a man. He says to you," Welcome, to Dallas, Texas"
Here is your first chance to gain some Rep; you could be a friendly person and say,"Hello" or you can tell him something heart-breaking. It's up to you.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Name: Drix "Devshot" Winterfield
Age: 21
Appearance: Tall, 6' feet flat, royal blue eyes, well built and normal skin tone
Bio: Drix was a very smart guy. Even though with his well-built body, he's personality is quite silent. His mother and father left him while he was young, he was left in an orphanage and attempted to escape. Living now, with his store down, he finds himself to make a name of his own.
Perk: Good Survivability
Traits: Determined, Pessimistic
-----------------------------
Gun:
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: Map of Texas
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $200.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 100%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 0
Sure, it's always nice to have new players.
You arrived in Dallas,Texas as so as you got off the train you saw a welcome sign saying,"Welcome to Dallas,Texas the friendliest place around!" population 100. When you look down at the small town you recognized a some of the buildings: A Bar,Genral Store, An Inn, and a Sheriff Office. When you start to walk foward you see a man. He says to you," Welcome, to Dallas, Texas"
Here is your first chance to gain some Rep; you could be a friendly person and say,"Hello" or you can tell him something heart-breaking. It's up to you.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Name: Jack "Wide Eye" Northrup
Age: 63
Appearance: Thin build, a short 5'3, long grey beard, balding head
Bio: An old prospector who tried to strike it rich when he was in his 40s. When he was 58 he was an unlucky bystander in a bar fight, which injured his left leg and now he limps. He spends his money traveling to where people tell him gold was recently found.
Perk: Keen Eye/ Dead Eye(Good for spotting gold and keeping an eye on potential thieves)
Traits: Greedy, will do almost anything for money, this is also his downside.
-----------------------------
Gun: Dragoon 1st Model Black Powder Pistol
Melee Weapon: Shovel
Equipment: Map of Texas, Shovel, Pickaxe
Ammo: 43 (bullets)
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: Pieces of Jerky (6), Pieces of Chicken (3), Sliced Pork (6), Corn (10), Bottles of Milk (2), Satchels of Water (3), Bottle of Whiskey (3)
Money: $57.55
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 62%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 36
You go to the room and as soon as you open the door a stench flows right into your face. You look in the bathroom and see that it probably hasn't been cleaned for years. Even though the whole room smells of death you manage to sleep through it. Then you wake up.
Name: Jack "Wide Eye" Northrup
Age: 63
Appearance: Thin build, a short 5'3, long grey beard, balding head
Bio: An old prospector who tried to strike it rich when he was in his 40s. When he was 58 he was an unlucky bystander in a bar fight, which injured his left leg and now he limps. He spends his money traveling to where people tell him gold was recently found.
Perk: Keen Eye/ Dead Eye(Good for spotting gold and keeping an eye on potential thieves)
Traits: Greedy, will do almost anything for money, this is also his downside.
-----------------------------
Gun: Dragoon 1st Model Black Powder Pistol
Melee Weapon: Shovel
Equipment: Map of Texas, Shovel, Pickaxe
Ammo: 43 (bullets)
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: Pieces of Jerky (6), Pieces of Chicken (3), Sliced Pork (6), Corn (10), Bottles of Milk (2), Satchels of Water (3), Bottle of Whiskey (3)
Money: $57.55
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 62%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 36
I make sure I didn't leave anything behind, and leave the hotel.
Name: Brandon Thomason
Age: 19
Appearance: black Trench coat, black jeans, black rawhide cowboy hat, Pale skin, blue eyes, black hair
Bio: Brandon wanted something new when he came to the west. He always thought that the cities were boring and hard to traverse. He decided to head west and be somebody.
Perk: Watch your step - footsteps are silent even when running.
Traits: Easily-angered, charming
-----------------------------
Gun:
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: Map of Texas
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $200.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 100%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 0
"Hello." Head to the general store.
Name: Stavi Gerini
Age: 26
Appearance: Handlebar Stache, Top Hat, Slicked back hair, Brown Eyes
Bio: I was born the youngest of 6 boys. I learned to fend for my self and decided to leave home at 18. I got a job as a butcher making extra cash at nights doing trick shots. I got a job as a bartender but left after I got involved in some gangs and banditos.
Perk: Quick Draw: I can shoot and draw a pistol faster
Traits: Fast, Not a good shot with rifles
-----------------------------
Gun: .45 Cavalry Revolver
Melee Weapon: Shovel
Equipment: Map of Texas, Golden Watch, 1862 Pocket Navy Revolver, rifle scope
Ammo: 59 (bullets)
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $373.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 84%
Stamina: 81%
Reputation: -35
"Yessir, two to three maybe for or five max. Can I go now? Also, I wasn't just randomly wandering through the desert. I'm new to town and I was looking about."
Name: Drix "Devshot" Winterfield
Age: 21
Appearance: Tall, 6' feet flat, royal blue eyes, well built and normal skin tone
Bio: Drix was a very smart guy. Even though with his well-built body, he's personality is quite silent. His mother and father left him while he was young, he was left in an orphanage and attempted to escape. Living now, with his store down, he finds himself to make a name of his own.
Perk: Good Survivability
Traits: Determined, Pessimistic
-----------------------------
Gun:
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: Map of Texas
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $200.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 100%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 0
I say "Hello. Since I'm new here, maybe you can kindly show me around?"
And give him a smile.
Name: Thom van der Huizen
Age: 22
Appearance: Tall guy, Blond hair and blue eyes.
Bio: Thom is a dutchman and he want to get out of Texas. He is well build, but a little scared in the great wild west. He bought already a boatticket to Europe. Back to his roots.
Perk: Run
Traits: Nerd
-----------------------------
Gun:
Melee Weapon: Swiss Knife
Equipment: Map of Texas, ticket home
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: Bread and cheese
Money: $150.00
Horse: none
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 100%
Stamina: 65%
Reputation: -10
Name: Jack "Wide Eye" Northrup
Age: 63
Appearance: Thin build, a short 5'3, long grey beard, balding head
Bio: An old prospector who tried to strike it rich when he was in his 40s. When he was 58 he was an unlucky bystander in a bar fight, which injured his left leg and now he limps. He spends his money traveling to where people tell him gold was recently found.
Perk: Keen Eye/ Dead Eye(Good for spotting gold and keeping an eye on potential thieves)
Traits: Greedy, will do almost anything for money, this is also his downside.
-----------------------------
Gun: Dragoon 1st Model Black Powder Pistol
Melee Weapon: Shovel
Equipment: Map of Texas, Shovel, Pickaxe
Ammo: 43 (bullets)
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: Pieces of Jerky (6), Pieces of Chicken (3), Sliced Pork (6), Corn (10), Bottles of Milk (2), Satchels of Water (3), Bottle of Whiskey (3)
Money: $57.55
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 60%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 36
You make sure the room is cleared and you leave nothing behind. Then you walk into the lobby, but no one is there.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Name: Brandon Thomason
Age: 19
Appearance: black Trench coat, black jeans, black rawhide cowboy hat, Pale skin, blue eyes, black hair
Bio: Brandon wanted something new when he came to the west. He always thought that the cities were boring and hard to traverse. He decided to head west and be somebody.
Perk: Watch your step - footsteps are silent even when running.
Traits: Easily-angered, charming
-----------------------------
Gun:
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: Map of Texas
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $200.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 100%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 10
You gain positive rep!
You head to the general store where a man greets you.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Name: Stavi Gerini
Age: 26
Appearance: Handlebar Stache, Top Hat, Slicked back hair, Brown Eyes
Bio: I was born the youngest of 6 boys. I learned to fend for my self and decided to leave home at 18. I got a job as a butcher making extra cash at nights doing trick shots. I got a job as a bartender but left after I got involved in some gangs and banditos.
Perk: Quick Draw: I can shoot and draw a pistol faster
Traits: Fast, Not a good shot with rifles
-----------------------------
Gun: .45 Cavalry Revolver
Melee Weapon: Shovel
Equipment: Map of Texas, Golden Watch, 1862 Pocket Navy Revolver, rifle scope
Ammo: 59 (bullets)
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $373.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 82%
Stamina: 79%%
Reputation: -35
The officer says," I'm sorry sir, but you are under arrest. The two other men have guns pointed at you."
A) Tell them you have done nothing wrong, but accept the arrest. Positive Rep
B) Say nothing. Neutral Rep
C) Resist arrest.(Kill them all) Negative Rep
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Name: Drix "Devshot" Winterfield
Age: 21
Appearance: Tall, 6' feet flat, royal blue eyes, well built and normal skin tone
Bio: Drix was a very smart guy. Even though with his well-built body, he's personality is quite silent. His mother and father left him while he was young, he was left in an orphanage and attempted to escape. Living now, with his store down, he finds himself to make a name of his own.
Perk: Good Survivability
Traits: Determined, Pessimistic
-----------------------------
Gun:
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: Map of Texas
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $200.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 100%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 0
The greeter says," Hello, I can tell you where to find things, but I cannot move from this spot. I have to greet others that come here."
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Name: Thom van der Huizen
Age: 22
Appearance: Tall guy, Blond hair and blue eyes.
Bio: Thom is a dutchman and he want to get out of Texas. He is well build, but a little scared in the great wild west. He already bought a boatticket to Europe. Back to his roots.
Perk: Run
Traits: Nerd
-----------------------------
Gun: None
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: Map of Texas
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $200.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 100%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 0
You will have to redo this whole character sheet because it is not right. Also you moved from New England (A section of America) to Texas. You cannot go to England. You don't start with -10 rep, unless you choose a bad choice then you have to tell me what choice you choose. All of your stats start at 100% and your stamina was at 65%. You don't start with any food or weapons, because you gave away all you had. You need to buy food and weapons first. You can't buy a boat ticket. You need one more trait and a name for your perk. You also have to tell me which trait is bad or good, because Nerd can be taken either way. Please redo the bio also.
Name: Brandon Thomason
Age: 19
Appearance: black Trench coat, black jeans, black rawhide cowboy hat, Pale skin, blue eyes, black hair
Bio: Brandon wanted something new when he came to the west. He always thought that the cities were boring and hard to traverse. He decided to head west and be somebody.
Perk: Watch your step - footsteps are silent even when running.
Traits: Easily-angered, charming
-----------------------------
Gun:
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: Map of Texas
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $200.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 100%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 10
Look around for the weapons section.
Name: Drix "Devshot" Winterfield
Age: 21
Appearance: Tall, 6' feet flat, royal blue eyes, well built and normal skin tone
Bio: Drix was a very smart guy. Even though with his well-built body, he's personality is quite silent. His mother and father left him while he was young, he was left in an orphanage and attempted to escape. Living now, with his store down, he finds himself to make a name of his own.
Perk: Good Survivability
Traits: Determined, Pessimistic
-----------------------------
Gun:
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: Map of Texas
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $200.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 100%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 0
Learn the ropes from him.
Name: Stavi Gerini
Age: 26
Appearance: Handlebar Stache, Top Hat, Slicked back hair, Brown Eyes
Bio: I was born the youngest of 6 boys. I learned to fend for my self and decided to leave home at 18. I got a job as a butcher making extra cash at nights doing trick shots. I got a job as a bartender but left after I got involved in some gangs and banditos.
Perk: Quick Draw: I can shoot and draw a pistol faster
Traits: Fast, Not a good shot with rifles
-----------------------------
Gun: .45 Cavalry Revolver
Melee Weapon: Shovel
Equipment: Map of Texas, Golden Watch, 1862 Pocket Navy Revolver, rifle scope
Ammo: 59 (bullets)
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $373.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 82%
Stamina: 79%%
Reputation: -35
I kick dirt thin their faces and whip out my pistol and unload a bunch of rounds into them. (remember my perk.)
Name: Brandon Thomason
Age: 19
Appearance: black Trench coat, black jeans, black rawhide cowboy hat, Pale skin, blue eyes, black hair
Bio: Brandon wanted something new when he came to the west. He always thought that the cities were boring and hard to traverse. He decided to head west and be somebody.
Perk: Watch your step - footsteps are silent even when running.
Traits: Easily-angered, charming
-----------------------------
Gun:
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: Map of Texas
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $200.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 100%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 10
The man sees you are looking for something and asks what.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Name: Drix "Devshot" Winterfield
Age: 21
Appearance: Tall, 6' feet flat, royal blue eyes, well built and normal skin tone
Bio: Drix was a very smart guy. Even though with his well-built body, he's personality is quite silent. His mother and father left him while he was young, he was left in an orphanage and attempted to escape. Living now, with his store down, he finds himself to make a name of his own.
Perk: Good Survivability
Traits: Determined, Pessimistic
-----------------------------
Gun:
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: Map of Texas
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $200.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 100%
Hunger: 100%
Stamina: 100%
Reputation: 0
The Gunsmith, General Store, Inn, and Bar are all next to each other and the stables is at the far side of town. I would advise you buy a gun and learn how to use it, there are a lot of gangs out there that would love to take what you have.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Name: Stavi Gerini
Age: 26
Appearance: Handlebar Stache, Top Hat, Slicked back hair, Brown Eyes
Bio: I was born the youngest of 6 boys. I learned to fend for my self and decided to leave home at 18. I got a job as a butcher making extra cash at nights doing trick shots. I got a job as a bartender but left after I got involved in some gangs and banditos.
Perk: Quick Draw: I can shoot and draw a pistol faster
Traits: Fast, Not a good shot with rifles
-----------------------------
Gun: None
Melee Weapon: None
Equipment: None
Ammo: None
Squad(Sheriff only): None
Gang(Outlaw only): None
Food: None
Money: $373.00
Horse: None
-----------------------------
Health: 85%
Hunger: 24%
Stamina: 34%
Reputation: -40
You kick dust into the sheriff's eyes and he falls to the ground then you are able to unload on one of the officers, but not the sheriff. The man falls dead, but you are hit in the back of the head and fall to the ground knocked out. You then wake up in a jail cell with none of your items besides your money. You look around the jail cell and there is a bed, a toilet and a sink. You noticed a pain in your arm and you realize that you have been shot there. A sheriff enters the room and throws you a piece of bread and some water. Then he says," You have a visitor and a man in a black suit walks in and sits down in the cell with you. He says," You have got a pretty bad case here Mr. Gerini. It's going to be hard, but I believe I can help you. Are you going to help me help you?"
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