Forums → WEPR → The R Word

Never heard of the "R word." What is it? Retard?

i was wondering the same thing.

Anyway, stopping the use of the "R" word is good. It is used in a demeaning way against others (just like the word gay).

Basically.

Using the word "retard" in a hearty manner (such as banter) I've not a problem with - I don't prefer to use the word but the general conception of the word isn't usually its actual meaning, and construing it as such is pretty silly.

Again it has the potential to create a negative connotation for the group as a whole; however, the word retard is generally applied to someone who has acted mentally impaired in some way relating it to it's medical meaning. As for the word gay it's used as a general negative and in a country here homosexuality is already grossly misunderstood it has the potential to cause more xenophobia towards the gay community.

Again, and for hopefully the last time, I am in no way arguing for censorship; I'm simply saying the use of these words should be curbed on a strictly individual level.

What would the appropriate way to use the word retard?

The real question is, what isn't.

I'm pretty sure you can use 'retard' in any way, as long as it's not intended to be hurtful.
Saying "He is mentally retarded, but excels in music."
Is not hurtful, and is the proper way to use the word.
But Saying "Dude, you're retarded." Is obviously an insult and is not the proper way to use the word.

Also, a mentally challenged person isn't the only definition of 'retard'.
"To delay or hold back in terms of progress, development, or accomplishment."
EX: "His progress was retarded by his limp."

When someone calls another "retarded", it's because the person did something stupid, not because it's offensive to be an actual retard. So the way i see it, calling one "gay" is offensive to homosexuals, calling someone "retarded" is not using the term in an offensive way.

I disagree. If calling someone 'gay' is offensive to homosexuals, then why isn't calling someone a 'retard' offensive to mentally challenged folks?

You could be using the word 'gay' as stupid, but does that still count as offensive to gays? Of course. You are still using a group of people (like mentally challenged people) to express your feelings slanderously.

Not sure if this has been said yet or not, but when someone calls another person "gay", they are using it as insult and not because the person is actually gay (usually), but because it could be seen as offensive to be gay.

It's what I've been trying to say but you summed it up nicer than I did [:

Although I still don't find using retard as a slang term intelligent at least it isn't creating a negative connotation in the way that the word gay does when used as an insult.

Moreover, I'm not arguing against the use of slang but rather slang that is harmful to a group and serve no constructive purpose.

Also, a mentally challenged person isn't the only definition of 'retard'.
"To delay or hold back in terms of progress, development, or accomplishment."
EX: "His progress was retarded by his limp."

That's kind of what I'm getting at, using the word even as an insult is to denote something slow or stunted. With gay we are artificially imposing a negative connotation to directly imply that being gay is something negative.

With gay we are artificially imposing a negative connotation to directly imply that being gay is something negative.

It was already established with negative connotations a long time ago, though the "that's gay" meaning did start fairly recently. In the 1700s calling a lady a gay woman meant she was a prostitute, which were frowned upon by society. In most of the 1900s (up to the '60s) it could mean a man who would be with many women (usually married ones), or conversely a woman who would be with many men (again usually married ones), which was also frowned upon by society. Depending on its usage, it could simply mean frivilous, where as straight meant serious and conventional. In the 1960s, it slowly transitioned to mean homosexual, but the old meaning (frivilous) was still used up until the early '70s (like in the Flintstones theme song "have a gay old time&quot. The artificial version ("that's gay" where gay = lame) was created/used since the mid-70s.

Lame was also altered from its original meaning of as was stated earlier in this thread. Cretin was another widely used pejorative term for insulting people from the 1800s until the 1970s when it was basically replaced by gay.

The "R word" being abolished and replaced by Mentally Challenged won't do us any good. I guess in the near future, people will be saying "that's MC" like an insult too.

Changing the language so people aren't offended is impossible. Kind of like how the phrase "he died" is being replaced by "he passed on" or "he's in a better place" doesn't change the fact that he died. For now it seems better, but later on it will also seem just as "bitter" as what it originally meant and that future generation will need to find something more suitable.

I disagree. If calling someone 'gay' is offensive to homosexuals, then why isn't calling someone a 'retard' offensive to mentally challenged folks?

Because I just explained that in my post.

So if I start using a random word as an insult (How about dictionary.com's word of the day &quotolemic"?) it should no longer be used?

I think the moral of the story they're trying to tell is for you to try and not insult people to begin with.

If standard people are offended by the word Retard, then they need some serious attitude heightening, for that word cannot apply to them

I would think that most everyone out there either has a family member or a friend who is retarded. If not that, I'd say people know some mentally disabled people as acquaintances... or they have at least seen one at some point in their life. To evoke the title "retard" is to not only connote that the receiver of the insult is lower than low, but to say that infers all of the mentally retarded people out there are on that same **** tier. For those people who hold witness to your slurs, insults, and "BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU'RE RETARD's" you are insulting every family member, friend, or acquaintance who is handicapped that they know and have ever associated with. It is the view of some that it is not their place to care about the slandering of people they know for it is those people who should stand their own ground regardless of level of capability... But, it is also the view of a lot of people that your slandering of a people who aren't able to properly defend themselves should not be allowed to go unabated. To call into question the intelligence of an individual through the usage of the word retard is to refer to the mentally handicapped b/c that is their general label. It isn't the formalized definitions/denotations that matter. It is the thoughts and ideas you are communicating through your arbitrarily ascribed words that matter. so... if you have conditioned someone into thinking that some word like... polemic or floogleflorp has a different or new meaning that is offensive, then unless you have a decent reason to offend them then you shouldn't be using it.

So calling someone the similarity to "A little slow" is worse than calling them "The slowest of them all"? I don't see why retard should be any worse then any other insult.

That is no longer the popular interpretation of the word, idiot, nor is it the way in which it is used. It is no longer used to refer to the most retarded of retarded people... but the word retarded still encompasses that. The informal definition of idiot is the one most popularly used by people. Most people I know crook their hand, beat on their chest, and go "duurrrrr you're a retard"... not "you're an idiot." Most people don't learn most of their vocabulary from a dictionary. Mr. Webster doesn't teach the majority of the content in one's lexicon to them... at least not to normal people. Most of us learn most of what we know vocabulary wise from how it is popularly used in our culture. Stating the formalized definitions of these words and then asking "how is that offensive???" is a laughable practice. It isn't all of the things it CAN mean... it's how it is used in context with our culture. The word retard could have a thousand different meanings, but the one that is used when insulting someone in this day and age is the one that refers to the mentally handicapped. You don't say "you're a retard" and expect people to think they're a non mentally handicapped person who is just carrying a lot of weight and thus whose speed is also severely slowed. ...which in turn would make them someone who is slowed... a retard.

Everyone who learned from the dictionary as their primary source, please make your presence known now. Please tell me (without looking it up) how many definitions there are of the word "run."

Definitions of words change. Whether they are official and in a dictionary or unofficial and not in a dictionary, I don't think it matters. The word GAY has changed in meaning before. Other words have changed in meaning. Take GENDER for example. Classically, GENder was based solely off of your GENitalia. That definition is still in the books. Nowadays, people have defined gender as being a mental state (some of you here have advocated that you don't even know what gender you are, but need to be evaluated psychologically to know (what?)). Those two clashing definitions can be found side by side in a dictionary. ...As Gender has changed, so has the word gay. Who is to say that the word GAY can't have a 3rd new current day meaning? Maybe people just mean that someone is stupid and not even homosexual when they say "gay." ...like the kid off of the cartoon, The Boondocks, who uses it every other sentence... sometimes he means it as homosexual, while other times he's calling his brother stupid. I do not believe that retard has gone through any such evolution.

Never have I ever heard it said by someone to someone else "You are retarded" and them mean that they were running slower than normal. If that was the context, then I've only seen it said in a manner like "the excessive heat is retarding your normal pace"....maybe not that exact sentence, but in a similar such structuring and fashion. When people say "You're retarded" or "you're a retard" they're almost always (or always in the cases I've witnessed) trying to say that you are stupid and akin to the mentally disabled.

"To delay or hold back in terms of progress, development, or accomplishment."

by that, a "retard" is anyone who fits that bill regardless of their type of hindered progression. ...but in all practical usage, people don't use "you're retarded" unless they're exclusively talking about mental capability. Other terms are used just about all the time for the other types of impairments. ...like being impaired, hindered, impeded,inhibited,etc ...at least in the areas where I've been and witnessed the verbal interactions of the people.

As I said before, what these people are most likely trying to do is to get people to refrain from insulting people through insults that use the label of a person or group of people as their message... because you are insulting people who have never insulted you by doing so. Although I think trying to limit a word is a little extreme, I see their side of the argument quite clear.

I'm sorry, Master565, but I disagree with your position. I am of the opinion that it is saying someone is or is equivalent to being mentally handicapped. People get offended if you think or imply that they are mentally handicapped. They are seen as sub human by many. Common variations of the usage of the insult include, "Are you retarded?" , "Are you a retard?", "Look everybody, I'm (insert your name here), and I'm a retard! DURRRR!!" Observed instances of these being used entailed them being questions of someone's mental capability, not whether or not they were physically resisted by something enough so as to be hindered in their movements. ...and let me remind you of the impersonation of the mentally handicapped when calling people retarded. How is that not saying that someone is of the mentally handicapped? How is that not implying that being mentally handicapped is a very bad and laughable thing?

-"you mean I gotta pick and choose my insults around which ones hurt people least?"

...how about trying to not insult in general. Or, show a little more control with them... like idk... if someone gets drunk and tries to drive but backs into a fence or tree, then you call them an idiot and take their keys... I would try and not call someone a retard or an idiot just for promoting the thought that people need to hold themselves to a higher standard when having a conversation than just expressing your liberty by saying, "BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!! I have the right to say whatever I want, thus I'll gladly do so however I want, YOU RETARD!!!!"

That is no longer the popular interpretation of the word, idiot, nor is it the way in which it is used.

It's kind of ironic that the inclusion of a comma before the word idiot in that sentence means you called him an idiot for not knowing that it is no longer the popular interpretaton of the word.

How is that not saying that someone is of the mentally handicapped? How is that not implying that being mentally handicapped is a very bad and laughable thing?

People are immature and will always insult each other. They'll use whatever acceptable term is available. "The first record of retarded in relation to being mentally slow was in 1895. The term retarded was used to replace terms like idiot, moron, and imbecile because retarded was not (then) a derogatory term. By the 1960s, however, the term had taken on a partially derogatory meaning as well." Here

Or, show a little more control with them... like idk... if someone gets drunk and tries to drive but backs into a fence or tree, then you call them an idiot and take their keys

So it's only acceptable if they're being really stupid?