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HEY PEOPLE WATCH ME PROCRASTINATING!!
Anyway, as this seems to be the time of exams for most people, let's talk about assignments. Or rather, that wonderful feeling that keeps you from making your assignments.
Perfectionism, the bane of people that actually tries to make their assignment instead of procrastinating, but ends up procrastinating because why bother when you can't make your assignment perfect?
So, people, how are you getting past this, should you be a perfectionist like yours truly, and more importantly, do you manage to do so in time?
How does it affect you besides making you want to stab yourself from reading cracked instead of reading?
Advice, tutorials and experiences welcome, discussion on procrastination as a whole, not so much.
People going "I'm not like this", please go smack yourself in the face with a wet newspaper.
Also, does anyone know where I can get "Aim for 80%" printed on a big poster?
- 29 Replies
Perfectionism, the bane of people that actually tries to make their assignment instead of procrastinating, but ends up procrastinating because why bother when you can't make your assignment perfect?
I procrastinate from time to time. Usually though I am on top of my work, even when I am home sick. It just makes more sense to do it and get it out of the way. Then you don't have it looming over your head and you can sit back and relax.
Another thing you can do if you just cannot help procrastinating is work really hard the first half of the grading period or whatever. Then you have a good grade and you can relax and when it drops down a bit you are not worried. If you start low then you become stressed and it is not fun at all. It is much less work to go from an A to a C then from a F to a C, but you get the same result.
Also, does anyone know where I can get "Aim for 80%" printed on a big poster?
I always assume that I will get 10% lower then I want. That way if I get what I wanted I am really happy, but if I am slightly below what I wanted I just think, "Eh, that is what I thought I got."
I procrastinate from time to time. Usually though I am on top of my work, even when I am home sick. It just makes more sense to do it and get it out of the way. Then you don't have it looming over your head and you can sit back and relax.
I have started several assignments two months in advance, and only got done a few hours before the deadline anyway. The "Better get it done" mentality is quite clear with me, but then comes "You need to make it perfect, precious, peeerfect, gollumgollum." and then I sit at four in the morning on the day of the deadline, exhausted and trying to cram six pages out of ten minutes.
Another thing you can do if you just cannot help procrastinating is work really hard the first half of the grading period or whatever. Then you have a good grade and you can relax and when it drops down a bit you are not worried. If you start low then you become stressed and it is not fun at all. It is much less work to go from an A to a C then from a F to a C, but you get the same result.
Same as above, also, university work, only the assignments count, and they are exams in themselves. If I cram for the first half of the semester, I still have to deal with writing the assignment to get a grade.
I always assume that I will get 10% lower then I want. That way if I get what I wanted I am really happy, but if I am slightly below what I wanted I just think, "Eh, that is what I thought I got."
I aim for perfect, hope I pass and assume I will need to make time for re-examination. If I pass, I am ecstatic. If I get an average grade, I am feeling awesome.
My aim is too high, my expectations way low.
"You need to make it perfect, precious, peeerfect, gollumgollum." and then I sit at four in the morning on the day of the deadline, exhausted and trying to cram six pages out of ten minutes.
Then you are not getting it done ahead of time, if I am understanding. Get it finished and then stare at it for the rest of the time trying to tweek it to get it the way you want it.
university work, only the assignments count, and they are exams in themselves. If I cram for the first half of the semester, I still have to deal with writing the assignment to get a grade.
Ya, I know. But it helps for the people not at college yet.
Then you are not getting it done ahead of time, if I am understanding. Get it finished and then stare at it for the rest of the time trying to tweek it to get it the way you want it.
Well, if I could do that, I would not have an issue, really... Instead I will stare at the blank paper for two hours while having this crippling, paralysing anxiety that is based in me wanting to make something that would potentially make my teachers make a new grade, just so they can reward me for all the awesome and awe inspiring work I have done.
Perfectionism, real perfectionism, and not just wanting it to be great, is about as useful as having a phobia and as easy to get out of. You can tell yourself that you are going to start right now and just write and it will be okay and if you don't do it, you will be doing just as crappy as last time, and three hours later your eyes are watering from staring at that blank piece of digital white paper. And it just sits there, mocking you with its... blankness.
Not to mention I am a doubly lost cause, since I am notoriously bad at asking for help from my professors or from my classmates or anything. This here is actually a step up, even though it was done as a makeshift procrastination. Because the procrastination is not the issue. It is what causes the procrastination.
Ya, I know. But it helps for the people not at college yet.
Perhaps. But, well, if you are a true perfectionist, every little assignment and test is difficult. We make mountains out of ant hills, and not the big kind of ant hill either, no more like the little hole with two pebbles newt to it that is formed in the cracks of pavement.
Still nice to see you try to help, though, much appreciated, so don't take my objections to heart.
I am not in glorious college yet and i deal with a mix of both. I am utteraly lazy and won't deal with a problem or assignment until it's beating my face. Then I try really hard to get a really good grade and if i get below 90% on something it makes me sort of mad and a bit of dissapointment. And it is a never ending cycle because after try really hard I really don't feel like doing anything else then something gets thrown in my face.
Instead I will stare at the blank paper for two hours while having this crippling, paralysing anxiety that is based in me wanting to make something that would potentially make my teachers make a new grade, just so they can reward me for all the awesome and awe inspiring work I have done.
Sadly though they will never make a new grade for you, but I see what you are saying.
Maybe you could try doing parts of it at a time. Do a paragraph, look at it, see if you can improve it. If you can improve it then do, if you cannot pat yourself on the back ,give yourself a cookie, and tell yourself that you will start the next paragraph in X time and that it will be just as good as the one you just did.
I have a bad habit of procrastinating. Well, only on long term assignments. I think, "well i have a good 2 weeks to do this. i'll get a bit done today the tommorow.." next day: "I have a good amount of time left. I think i'll play a game for a little while..." **3 hours later** "crap it noght time tommorow then..." and so on. but i dont know about perfectionism. im happpy to just get a C sometimes. thats how hard some things are in my class...
Sadly though they will never make a new grade for you, but I see what you are saying
Nope. In high school, our English teacher did make up a new grade for another student. Basically she got the highest mark possible, with an added plus. Apparently this teacher thought it possible to get something more than a hundred percent correct.
Maybe you could try doing parts of it at a time. Do a paragraph, look at it, see if you can improve it. If you can improve it then do, if you cannot pat yourself on the back ,give yourself a cookie, and tell yourself that you will start the next paragraph in X time and that it will be just as good as the one you just did.
Might be it. That linked site also suggests reward yourself for writing and so forth, lowering expectations... Getting professional help...
Considering I will have to deal with a thesis/final thesis for my degree this time next year, it really ought to get fixed soon.
Also, derp, somehow misspelled "erfectionism" into "rocrastination" in my OP. Explains the "I procrastinate" stuff above.
Oh well. Would be nice to see some true perfectionists' experiences rather than the usual "I'm lazy, lol".
lowering expectations
I have never been a big an of this. If your expectations are way to high then yes lowering them might help. I have a feeling though that people that would do this would just keep lowering them until it was so low that it didn't really matter.
Getting professional help...
I was going to say this but then it seemed sorta mean so I didn't.
Considering I will have to deal with a thesis/final thesis for my degree this time next year
Can I ask what your degree is in? Well I guess I did ask so the better question would be, will you tell me what your degree is in?
I have never been a big an of this. If your expectations are way to high then yes lowering them might help. I have a feeling though that people that would do this would just keep lowering them until it was so low that it didn't really matter.
Well, let's take it from my site, because it will explain this pretty well (also why wikipedia considers perfectionism a mental disorder in some cases): I have barely any feeling of self worth, as you might be aware. Sometimes it's alright, but other times it is rather devastating, which is when I start talking myself down more than usually, denying compliments if they aren't made as small essays and basically... just suck at thinking I can function like a normal human being. Now, in spite of that, or maybe because of that, I want my school work to be perfect. Every sentence I write has to be correct to every extend, and it needs to be like this in the first try, because I think if I re-read it or have to change something, it will just get worse and worse from there.
Everything. And considering we are talking assignments of 20-30 pages in length, you might see where the issue starts. Because there is no "I will start this, and then when I get going, I can go back and change and add stuff", there is only "I need to write 20 pages of utter perfection right now".
Some websites (since I got curious...) define it as an all-or-nothing mentality, where it either has to be perfect, or it is simply useless to the perfectionist. It is correct from my point of view. The only reason I get stuff done is because I start working the night before the deadline, and at the time where I finally manage to start writing, I am so exhausted I just want to get it over with, even if it is going to suck butt (oh, and it will).
Yeah. I kinda lack the other parts of the scale between the two extremes of perfection.
I was going to say this but then it seemed sorta mean so I didn't.
I should probably consider it, but the people I have talked to about it before were rather incompetent in that regard.
Can I ask what your degree is in? Well I guess I did ask so the better question would be, will you tell me what your degree is in?
I will be Cenny, cand.scient.bibl. Or, well, have a master in library and information science.
define it as an all-or-nothing mentality
I think this is where I differ from you. Most of the time if it is a paper I care about I always think to myself that it could be better. I will write it and it will be good but then I will make corrections and even when it looks perfect I always think that there could be something I could do that would make it better. I have never had the problem of wanting to do it all perfectly the first time.
I think if I re-read it or have to change something, it will just get worse and worse from there.
I sometimes feel that way. Usually I am stuck keeping it the way it is even if I hate it. Or, even worse, I change it and then cannot remember what I had before.
The main problem for you right now is the all or nothing. If you could get over that I think you would be fine, or I could help more. I don't know how you would fix that though without going to a psychologist or something. Sorry that I cannot be more help.
I think this is where I differ from you. Most of the time if it is a paper I care about I always think to myself that it could be better. I will write it and it will be good but then I will make corrections and even when it looks perfect I always think that there could be something I could do that would make it better. I have never had the problem of wanting to do it all perfectly the first time.
Healthy perfectionist, thou are. The "There could be something I could do better" thing is the same for me. Except it happens during my thoughts about what I need to write, instead of after I have written something down. Which is what leads to that paralysing anxiety.
I sometimes feel that way. Usually I am stuck keeping it the way it is even if I hate it. Or, even worse, I change it and then cannot remember what I had before.
This is actually pretty much how I feel when someone mentions a flaw in my drawings, when I am in that self esteem hell. I can look at it, and because it is flawed, I will hate it, and I will try to fix it, but it will never feel as nice as it did before the flaw was pointed out.
... No wonder people don't like giving me critiques...
The main problem for you right now is the all or nothing. If you could get over that I think you would be fine, or I could help more. I don't know how you would fix that though without going to a psychologist or something. Sorry that I cannot be more help.
Well, as they say, you have to realise you have a problem before you can fix it. Talking/writing about it is helpful, and seeing people with the same problems, or at least a bit of it also humanises it a bit.
Everything else is pretty much my own decision, as I am not one to seek out actual help on the internet. Enlightenment and advice, other people's experiences, but not help, because, well, if you realise you need help, you need proper help, I guess.
Not to mention that writing about this is a perfectly soothing procrastination, which, while not helping in the long run, is better than sitting about in paralysed terror that I have a deadline to keep to and stuff to read and other stuff to write...
So, it does help.
Healthy perfectionist, thou are.
Ya, but if it on something I don't care about then it just comes out as a bunch of sh*t. I should really start caring about more things.
it will never feel as nice as it did before the flaw was pointed out.
That is why I hate critiquing people. I am the exact same way. I will think that my pic is great and then someone will mention something and it will bug me until I just hate the picture. So that is why when I do critique I don't say that something looks off, I say that it might look better if you did this so they can try it but not feel as if they have to change it.
and other stuff to write...
So does this happen to you for WoM and drawing or just papers for school?
That is why I hate critiquing people. I am the exact same way. I will think that my pic is great and then someone will mention something and it will bug me until I just hate the picture. So that is why when I do critique I don't say that something looks off, I say that it might look better if you did this so they can try it but not feel as if they have to change it.
I am a bit ambiguous about it, because I really want to improve, and the lack of crits make me rather frustrated. But I can't blame people, because the crits tend to hit at the worst possible time, which makes me sound like a whiny brat instead of just a regular brat.
Then at least it works out better for you, since you can take a firm stand and tell people not to give you critiques.
So does this happen to you for WoM and drawing or just papers for school?
Fiction comes a lot more naturally. I only hate it after getting done, instead of before I start. Which would be the reason for the hundred rewrites, if the real reason wasn't Strop changing the plot...
But it is a dominant feature in my academic work, and the reason I do a lot worse than I realistically should.
Because, and this will come off as completely narcissistic, I am intelligent, I know a lot, I work my butt out of my trousers, I want to know, I want to learn... But I can't communicate any of this into an academic setting... which in turn, instead of making me a misunderstood genius, makes me a failure.
That was a lot of me talk...
Ya, but if it on something I don't care about then it just comes out as a bunch of sh*t. I should really start caring about more things.
From my PoV, I would say not caring enough is better than caring too little... But I have actually tried simply not caring at all, and it is an even worse motivator than caring too much. So, I know that feel, bro.
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