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Chryosten
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Chryosten
17,384 posts
Herald

You are the butler of the above person and you are asked to do an impossible task. You have to do it, so tell us how you did it.

Example:
P1: Butler! Cut my milk!
P2:I freeze it and then cut it with my knife. Butler! Bathe in lava and come out unscathed.
P3: I put on a heat suit and bathe in lava. Butler! Go get me a real dinosaur!
and so on...

Now let's begin:

Butler! Go fly without using any modes of transport!

  • 353 Replies
Snag618
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Snag618
6,704 posts
Blacksmith

Ok, I'll put on a very thick glove and let it bite that.

Butler, don't breathe for 5 hours.

(Rip, I'm surprised that you could read that.)

anewbeginning
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anewbeginning
379 posts
Nomad

I use one of those techniques invented by an Indian guy in which you go into a coma-like state and only breath once per every five hours.

Butler! Construct a wooden model of a four-dimensional square,

Nerdsoft
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Nerdsoft
1,266 posts
Peasant

Okay... fourth dimension is time (according to some people), so I can do that easily.
Butter! Spread yourself on my toast!

anewbeginning
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anewbeginning
379 posts
Nomad

*Four dimensional SQUARE. A square, by definition, is two dimensional. Therefore, you are wrong.*

I do that easily by hopping on your toast and spreading myself out.

Butler! Create an anagram out of this message!

Chryosten
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Chryosten
17,384 posts
Herald

Easily done sir! Games Heists!

Butler! Stand outside in the cold with minimal clothing and don't get sick!

bingu77788
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bingu77788
464 posts
Peasant

I hire Unleashed to stay beside me.

Butler! Cut your hand out!

ItalianSuperBoy
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ItalianSuperBoy
295 posts
Peasant

Elementary, sir! I trace my hand on paper and then cut it out.

Butler! Make every game on Steam free for me!

Chryosten
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Chryosten
17,384 posts
Herald

I ask a couple programmers to make every single game on Steam have 'Free' as the price while leaving the price as normal.

Butler! Jump up and down until you reach space!

anewbeginning
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anewbeginning
379 posts
Nomad

Simple! I jump up, and reach the space above my head!

Butler! Disprove athiesm and religion at the same time!

Chryosten
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Chryosten
17,384 posts
Herald

But I'm Agnostic sir. Therefore gods don't and never will exist.

Butler! Get me the Mona Lisa!

Devoidless
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Devoidless
3,675 posts
Jester

But I'm Agnostic sir. Therefore gods don't and never will exist.
That's not agnosticism...at all. Learn your terms before tossing them around willy-nilly. It does not even 'solve' the situation posed given the meaning you tied to agnosticism, nor does the actual meaning solve it.
Back to the game:

Well, sir. You are filthy rich. As such, I took the liberty to 'urchase' you the Louvre. By 'urchase' I mean 'bribed and bought-out all the people required in order to make you the curator of the Louvre'. You now 'own' the Mona Lisa.

Butler! Show me pertinent international news on a mainstream news channel!
GandalftheGrey666
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GandalftheGrey666
1,859 posts
Peasant

I buy a mainstream news channel for you and tell the crew to show pertinent international news.

Butler! Create a robot without using any hands!

Jacen96
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Jacen96
3,087 posts
Bard

I use psionics (read: Starcraft)

Butler! Build a holodeck.

~~~Darth Caedus

UnleashedUponMankind
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UnleashedUponMankind
7,043 posts
Grand Duke

I hire Data, so he can teach me how to build one.

Bulter! Walk to the moon on your bare foots.

Azywng
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Azywng
373 posts
Shepherd

I turn myself into an alien from mars, then walk.

Butler! Punch a sentry gun to death! (From Team Fortress 2)

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