Forums → The Tavern → Eliminate Vegetables and Initiate Liberty!
| 59 | 16881 |
My dearest comrades,
Look out upon this world of ours and realize as I have realized that we live in an endless salad buffet of lies! I too have been tempted by the siren song of spinach, the enticing eggplant, the alluring avocado. But be tempted no longer! Consider the noble rabbit: once a ferocious predator feared by even mightiest lion, now it must scavenge suburban lettuce like a strung out garden junkie. The cow, the deer, the antelope; all have fallen from greatness into the compost heaps of history.
For now, thanks to our diet supplemented by such nourishment as coca-cola, bologna, and American "cheese", we have been spared our herbivorous doom. BUT FOR HOW MUCH LONGER??! Even as I type these words, children around the world are being forced to consume broccoli. Mere children! I realize that this might be shocking to some, but the truth must be known. I have seen the root of all evil and it is a radish.
AND SO. I propose we form a league of like minded peoples in order to fight back against the tyranny of turnips! Join me, if you carrot all! Lettuce shed our leafy shackles! Beet down the oppressors! Toss the salad of evil back into the fires of hell from whence it came!
- 59 Replies
What about things that contain plants, like cookies, cakes, pizzas etc.?
Bread is made out of wheat grains, and thats made out of wheat which is plant. So therefore, we cannot eat bread or anything made out of dough.
Exactly. Worse still, I just figured it also includes Nutella, and chocolate in general. After all, chocolate is a product made from the seeds of the cacao tree.
Nah, thats only like, dark chocolate or whatever. Nowadays, most choco is fake and made out of 99.9999% sugar (yum) I think, I dunno actually, this is just my edumacated guess.
But still, regardless of the original post, the title of this thread is clear: Eliminate Vegetables!
So I'll just assume that herbivorous doom was a metaphor.
Don't forget people, @HahiHa is an agent of the enemy! He was sent to divide and distract us! To turn us against each other and make us doubt ourselves! Do not fall for his lies!
But still, regardless of the original post, the title of this thread is clear: Eliminate Vegetables!
Would you really ignore the clear message of the OP in favour of a linguistically hazy word in the title? Let's look at the word, then:
-
vegetable:
noun
1. any plant whose fruit, seeds, roots, tubers, bulbs, stems, leaves, or flower parts are used as food, as the tomato, bean, beet, potato, onion, asparagus, spinach, or cauliflower.
2. the edible part of such a plant, as the tuber of the potato.
3. any member of the vegetable kingdom; plant.
-
Do you see anything in that definition that would contradict my arguments? I don't.
Don't forget people, HahiHa is an agent of the enemy! He was sent to divide and distract us! To turn us against each other and make us doubt ourselves! Do not fall for his lies!
Yeah, don't listen to the malignant omnivore that I am! Forgo your chocolate and give it to me!
Never! We're using our veggies that we dont eat to get rabbits and deer n ****e to come to us so we can have some meat. Yum, Rabbit-on-a-stick
That would include mushrooms too in a way (I don't like them but other veggie haters may).
Mushrooms are not plants. Therefore, they are not vegetables.
Nah, thats only like, dark chocolate or whatever. Nowadays, most choco is fake and made out of 99.9999% sugar (yum) I think, I dunno actually, this is just my edumacated guess.
Um, no. Even fake chocolate (carob) is a plant product, and Nutella is right out due to hazelnuts, anyway.
But still, regardless of the original post, the title of this thread is clear: Eliminate Vegetables!
Any part of a plant is a vegetable, including all fruits. Excuse me while I laugh at all of you between bites of a delicious blueberry pie.
@FishPreferred Have it your way I suppose. True veggie haters know what our leader meant with the word vegetables. If any part of a plant is a vegetable, then how do we call the "vegetables" we are talking about?
So, as @HahiHa graciously provided a link about the definition of a vegetable, this link provides 3 definitions. One of them defines vegetable as any type of plant but the others do not and I think we all know what kind of "vegetables" was our leader talking about.
So, as HahiHa graciously provided a link about the definition of a vegetable, this link provides 3 definitions. One of them defines vegetable as any type of plant but the others do not and I think we all know what kind of "vegetables" was our leader talking about.
This is a wonderful strawman you've planted here. While only one of the definition includes literally every plant, the other two still include any plant and any part of a plant that is edible, which is in line with our argument and refutes your shady linguistical machinations. As I have already demonstrated, you are deliberately ignoring what your leader was actually talking about, all to the benefit of your inconsistent interpretation of his radical ideals. Admit it, you are unable to forgo all that tasty vegetal food.
@HahiHa we will never know if our leader doesn't show up to clarify this. But it is you who dwells on the details in my opinion. You, demon!
Besides, you seem to like vegetables. So why bother at what other people think? If we want to hate any part of a plant, even if it is an integral part of our diet, then what's your problem?
But it is you who dwells on the details in my opinion. You, demon!
This comes as no surprise, coming from someone who throws plants and fungi together
Besides, you seem to like vegetables. So why bother at what other people think? If we want to hate any part of a plant, even if it is an integral part of our diet, then what's your problem?
A smart-*** needs no reason to be a smart-***. Also, it's fun. And a good argument is a good argument no matter whether the topic argued about is serious or not. But maybe I'll leave you in peace... for now.
This is a wonderful strawman you've planted here. While only one of the definition includes literally every plant, the other two still include any plant and any part of a plant that is edible, which is in line with our argument and refutes your shady linguistical machinations. As I have already demonstrated, you are deliberately ignoring what your leader was actually talking about, all to the benefit of your inconsistent interpretation of his radical ideals. Admit it, you are unable to forgo all that tasty vegetal food.
Surely, you people misunderstand our leader's intentions! It's not that anything that contains ingredients of vegetables in inherently bad, it's simple the end product of it all, namely the taste and healthiness of such foods!
Take this, for an example! Our leader has clearly stated in his prophetic message,
For now, thanks to our diet supplemented by such nourishment as coca-cola, bologna, and American "cheese"
Now, you of all people should know what coca cola is made of, yes? Cane sugar, Corn syrup, vanilla and other extracts... tell me, what are the sources of these ingredients? Indeed, though the source is evil, the end product is a visually enticing and palatable pungent mix of what vegetable heathens might call 'unhealthy'. Did he, at any time, reject the endless culinary uses of what vegetables might offer? No! To be able to use the bad for the good is one of the many talents that humans have an apt for!
And let's go back to your avocado-eggplant argument... Sure, they're fruits. Technically. But culinary speaking, they're vegetables, through and through. Tell me, at any point in time had you enjoyed a bowl of fruit salad (salad being a word I despise, by the way), there was an assortment of eggplants and tomatoes along with your apple slices and strawberries? I THINK NOT! Perhaps we shouldn't delve into the intrinsic technicalities of what something is, and look at a much more 'spiritual' level in the fine art of dining. If we're discussing the exclusion of things from our diet that is unrealistically in almost every confectionery, shouldn't we instead take a measurement of taste rather than chemical? I, for one, am all for removing tomatoes, eggplants, avocados, and even potatoes, but ketchup, potato chips, and french fries must stay. After all, how can you continue to call something that has been deep fried and oiled as well as salted a vegetable? Might as well call a mummified corpse a living human as well! Do you dishonor the name of what is 'junk food'??
And of course, this argument applies to cakes, baked goods, chocolates, and other things as well, friends, so don't lose heart against these nay sayers!
After all, one who pulls up definitions of vegetables just to prove an argument to convert us surely has to be a stick in a mud. Believe in our leader's words, for he is all present and omniscient, all powerful and omnipotent!
I DECLARE WE PASS THE 1ST AMENDMENT TO OUR DECLARATION OF ANTI-VEGITARIANISM!
1st. Any Plants that are deep-friend, such as okra, shall be excluded from our destruction of vegetables. The same shall be said for any veggies that 3rd or 2nd world countries need to survive, I.E. Potatoes, Rice, and Wheat. Any plants that are used to make alcoholic beverages are also excluded. Any Veggies that can be used to make deserts, such as Cocoa, Sweet Potatoes (Yams) and Sugar.
This is my proposal. If we can get at least 5 people to sign this, im sure we can add it to our document.
SIGNS:
1. Evilsweetblock
You must be logged in to post a reply!